Chapter 1: Here's Zelgadis


"Oh dear how exciting. I must inform the girls..."

Getting up from the position near a small table filled with toys and trinkets, a small boy with raven hair walked toward a small kitchen. His clothes 5 sizes to big for him, the boy stumbled as he made his way forward.

"Syphiel?"

A young lady with long, dark, blue hair turned and smiled widely. "Yes, father? Oh, ... I mean Phibrizzo?"

Phibrizzo smiled as he heard her correct herself. These girls were so silly. They kept calling him fa-fath-A-CHOO!

Rubbing his nose, a much taller man sniffed and looked at Syphiel, shrugging in his now fitting clothes. "Ah... sorry about that dear. I know that must be annoying. I'm sorry. Now... ," he paused, a finger to his chin, dark hair hanging around his face, "What was I talking about? ... Ah yes! We will soon be having some guest arriving! Good friends of mine. Please set up two spare futons for them in the guest room."

"Of course -- "

A-CHOO.

"Fa-Eh... Phibrizzo-chan."

"Thank you... eh... for whatever. Can you bring me some cookies Syphiel?"

Syphiel smiled. "Yes, I will."

"Thanks," exclaimed an excited Phibrizzo.

Then he began walking back to his table of toys when... A-CHOO!

Rubbing his nose, older Phibrizzo quickly strolled over to the steps. "I better inform the other girls before I forget."


In the streets, everyone was peacefully shopping...

"What in the world is wrong with you Uncle Rezo?!"

Hearing the slightly rough voice, the two men turned. Looking at them first glance, you wouldn't notice anything, but glancing at them again, most people would stop and stare. For you see, looking at them, you would notice.... they were exactly the same. The only difference between the two was one was blind while the other had bright green eyes.

"Zelgadis," both said in unison, "Honor and duty command you to do this. Both as a martial artist, and as a Saotome."

As the lavender haired youth turned toward the two "uncles," a gloved hand pulled the hood further down over the spiky hair. "Stupid idiot... I'm going back to China. Screw you both."

As the youth started heading down the road, the two twin uncles looked at each other with a worried frown on their faces. "We have to stop him!" They yelled.

The green-eyed Rezo ran pulled out a bat, as did blind Rezo. They both ran toward Zelgadis...

CRACK!

Looking at the splintered bat end in his hands, the twin smiled nervously as Zelgadis turned around, a dark frown on his face, growl forming in his throat.

SMASH!

Both stopped for a moment and turned as they heard the loud crash. Zelgadis raised a weary hand to his forehead and Rezo bright green eyes widened. There, lying on top of a broken fruit stand, floundered blind Rezo, smacking the fruit with his wooden bat shouting small cries of "Take this!" and "Take that, you disobedient boy!"

"Rezo! Stop! No, that's not Z -- OW! Don't hit ME!"

Zelgadis regarded them with half amusement and half disgust. "How stupid can those two get? I mean really, trying to knock me o-mmf!"

"Sorry, Zelly, my boy," rasped both Rezo's as they forced a sweetly smelling towel over his mouth and nostrils, "It's for your own good."

When Zelgadis gave away to unconsciousness, blind Rezo grabbed his feet and his twin grabbed the boy's arms. The quickly hefted him up and began carrying his prone form.

"Good thing you kept that stash of chloroform with you, Rezo."

"Yes, it does come in handy for things like this."

They then began carrying him off down the street.


"Filia?"

"Yes, daddy?"

Phibrizzo peeked his head in his middle daughters room, checking to see if she was there. When he saw the blonde haired girl, lying on her bed reading comic books, he sighed.

"Could you gather your sister and tell her to come in. I have an important message for you all. Please do this quic -- "

A-CHOO!

Filia's blue eyes regarded the smaller boy with only slight interest. "Phibrizzo-chan, please get out before you annoy me. Go find some pepper and breath it in or something."

Phibrizzo looked at her oddly. "What's wrong with you, Filia?"

"You. Go play with your toys."

Looking confused for a moment, Phibrizzo's face suddenly grew with revelation. Smacking his fist into a small palm, he looked at her. "I bet you're just still mad that I drew in your comic books. Right?"

Filia's expression darkened severely. "AND for cutting my hair, AND putting frogs in my room, AND breaking my cameras, AND for giving my underwear to the boys from school, AND for leaving ants in my bed, AND FOR BEING A PEST!"

SLAM!

"Wow," Phibrizzo mumbled, stunned, "I guess it's her time of the month."

With that finished, he reached into his long pants and pulled out a snake. Smiling, he let it twist around his hands before setting it down on the floor near the closed door. His grin grew as it slid underneath the door.

"A-A-A-A-A-A-A-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H!"

With that, he began whistling "What a Wonderful World," hopping down the stairs.


"HI-YAH!"

Suddenly, the granite block fell to pieces, breaking onto the floor. The resounding echo filled the silent dojo hall. Raising a hand to her forehead the girl pushed back a few matted strands of her red hair. Blinking her ruby eyes, she smiled to herself in admiration.

"That felt nice."

Rubbing the back of her neck, she began to relax into a kata.

"There you go again, Lina. No wonder all the boys think you're so weird."

Lina frowned as she heard her older sister's voice resonate in her ears. Turning she narrowed her eyes. Seeing the long, straight golden hair of her sisters, blowing with some unnatural wind, she sighed. Filia's blue eyes were filled with merriment at making her younger sister frustrated.

"Why should I care what they think? Not _everyone_ cares about boys, Filia."

Seeing that her remark didn't have the desired affect, Filia's azure eyes narrowed. Crossing her arms, she watched Lina through thin slits. "Fine then. I guess you don't care much about anything, do you? Especially what dad wants to talk to us about."

That perked Lina's interest. "What? What is it?"

Filia smiled. She got her. "I'll tell you if you give me 200 yen."

Lina frowned. "Geeze Filia! Can't you ever just help your family without needing to be paid?"

"No."

"Fine then," Lina spat, "I'll find out myself."

"Your choice."

As she began to walk away, Lina called out to her with a smile. "I bet you're just pissed because Phibrizzo pulled another trick on you. Aren't you?"

Filia stopped and flinched for a second before straightening and walking into the house stiffly. Lina blew a stray strand out of her face. "Yep, that was it."

Quickly she ran to the house.


"WhAt?!"

Adult Phibrizzo watched as Lina exploded, her eyes wide and furious, face as red as her hair. "It's exactly as I said. One of you will be engaged to my friend's nephew. We made a pact a long time ago to have our kin would marry so our dojos could join."

"Bu... But...But. ." Lina sputtered, grasping for some kind of word.

"No. You girls will go through this. Whichever one he picks, will be his fiancée."

All three girls looked at each other. Then, with a smile of knowing, they all withdrew from their pockets small peppershakers. Leaping to their feet they threw some toward their father. His green eyes widened for a moment before he sneezed.

A-CHOO!

Wiping his nose with a long sleeve, little Phibrizzo wagged a finger at the girls. "Not today, girls. I've got it figured out this time. I wrote myself a message."

Looking down at his hand, Phibrizzo read, "No, girls, you cannot con... conv... convince...convince me to not let you ma... mar. . marry the boy."

With a confident smile, Phibrizzo looked at them, his face beaming. "Now hand me some pepper so I can change back. I don't want them to show up with me like this..."

BANG!

"What was that?" Syphiel looked around, bewildered.

"Someone asking for trouble, I bet," Lina replied, rolling up her sleeves.

Filia put a hand out to stop Lina. "Oh Lina, don't jump to conclusions. Let's just go find out."

Phibrizzo scuffling behind them, dragging his long clothes, the three girls walked to the door and slid it open.

"Oh my," replied Syphiel, hand over her mouth.

Standing outside the door were two men carrying an unconscious person. But the strange thing about them was that... well... they were exactly the same. Except perhaps that one could see and one could not. The blind one kept bumping into the door.

Phibrizzo squeezed his way past the girl's legs and looked at the strangers. Grabbing a peppershaker from Filia's limp hands, he quickly inhaled some and sneezed. No one seemed to notice the shift as his adult form shook and smiled.

"Rezo! How are you?! It's been so long! But... uh... who's your friend...er... twin?"

The blind man laughed. "This isn't my twin. His name is Koppi. He's. . eh... well you'll see. Can you let us in?"

Doubtful grin on his face, Phibrizzo let them in. They stepped a few more feet before letting the youth fall to the ground.

CLUNK.

Everyone whirled around. "What was that," Filia asked, surprised.

Both Rezo and Koppi smiled nervously and reached a hand behind their head in unison. "Sorry," they spoke as one, "I didn't mean to be loud."

"Uh. . yeah," Filia sighed, eying them carefully.


"Wh... Where am I?"

As Zelgadis opened heavy eyes, the youth saw sets of eyes staring down. With surprise, he jumped to his feet, looking around warily. Six people stared back at him, all sitting around a table.

Spotting his uncles, he yelled, "Where am I, Rezo?!"

Both Rezo and Koppi turned to him and tried to calm him down, "Zelgadis, calm down, me boy. Were here at my friend's place."

Turning to the man with black hair, they spoke, "This is my friend Phibrizzo. Phibrizzo, this is Zelgadis. And these three ladies are his daughters."

Phibrizzo coughed and announced the three out loud. Pointing to the oldest one with dark purple hair he said, "This is Syphiel, my oldest daughter. She is nineteen."

Pointing to the blond he replied, "This is my second daughter, Filia. She is seventeen."

Finally, he pointed to the red head. As Zelgadis laid eyes on her, he could see that she wasn't too happy. With her arms across her chest, she stared at him coldly. "This is Lina, my youngest daughter. She is sixteen."

Phibrizzo got up and stood behind Zelgadis. "So boy, take your pick."

Zelgadis stared at him as if he were insane. "What the heck do you mean 'take your pick?!'"

Phibrizzo slapped him on the back with a smile. But as his hand hit his back, Phibrizzo cringed in pain. "OW! I felt like I hit a rock!"

"Uh... ah...Well..."

As the two twins tried to think of an explanation, Phibrizzo reached behind Zelgadis head and pulled back his hood. All the Tendos gasped as they saw him. His skin, a dark blue, covered his face. In fact, he had little stones imbedded in his face under his eyes. His hair was thick and stiff, almost like metal. And his eyes, in them he had thin slits of pupils, almost like a cat.

"You're a chimera?!"

As he heard them yell in surprise, Zelgadis jerked his hood back on. Filia looked at Phibrizzo with anger in her face. "There's no way I'm marrying that stone freak! You can count me out!"

Zelgadis growled as he heard her comment.

"That's not nice. Shut up, Filia!" With new appreciation, Zelgadis turned his eyes toward the petite red head. She had defended him.

"That's not all," Filia mumbled, ignoring Lina's chastising.

Walking up to the chimera, Filia poked at the youth's chest. It wasn't flat, as she had suspected. Turning toward her father, she angrily faced him. "Father," she muttered, "You expected us to marry a girl?!"

"wHaT?!"

Phibrizzo fainted. Rezo and Koppi cast worried glances toward each other. "Oops. Forgot to mention that."

Seeing her sister screaming at her fainted father about not bringing a boy here, but a girl, Lina walked over to the chimera girl and put a hand on her shoulder.

Looking up, Zelgadis saw her smile. "Hey. Join me in the practice hall. As you know, I'm Lina. You want to be friends?"

Zelgadis smiled back. "Eh... Sure."

They walked off as Filia steamed at her father. Syphiel continued to pour tea for the others. But wait... Where was Rezo and Koppi?


Near the open door of the dojo hall, a bush quivered. Suddenly two violet haired heads poked out from the bush.

"Koppi, do you have the camera?"

Pulling out a small hand held camera, Koppi gave a thumbs up and then realized his mistake, blushing. "Uh... yeah. Right here."

"Good, let's see if we get anything to happen here. Start recording!"

"Right!"


The sight of the dojo impressed Zelgadis as she walked in. It was too large, but it was nice. Still wearing her black gi, Lina led her out to the hall. "You know karate right?"

Zelgadis kept looking around. She mumbled back to her, "A little."

Flipping her hair to the side, Lina looked at Zelgadis with new interest. "Well, how about we have a little match? Just for fun."

Zelgadis shot her a wary glance. "Um..."

"Don't worry, I wont hurt you."

In her mind Zelgadis simply though to herself, yeah...

After pausing to bow for a moment. Lina straightened and looked to her opponent. She was simply standing there, hands behind her back. Taking the advantage, she charged toward Zelgadis and threw a punch toward the girl's head. She dodged it. Lina threw another. And the girl dodged it again.

What is up with this girl, Lina thought, is she reading my moves? Kicking her legs out toward Zelgadis' feet, Lina watched as she simply jumped up in the air and dodged it. Lina continued a flurry of attacks that ended with Zelgadis dodging or jumping around them.

"What's wrong with you," she yelled, throwing a punch toward her shoulder, "Swing at me!"

As she continued to dodge, Lina was getting angrier by the minute. Okay, she thought, now I'm getting serious. Charging toward her quickly, she threw a mighty punch toward her.

CRACK.

Lina looked in surprise as she struck the wall, the wood splintering beneath her fist. Suddenly she felt a soft tap at the back of her head. Turning she glanced around nervously and found Zelgadis smiling back at her. Smiling back she broke into tense laughter. Zelgadis followed her method.

"Well, she said, "You're pretty good. I'm just glad you're not a boy. I would have really hated to lose to a boy."

Zelgadis regarded her stiffly and nervously as she walked out. What am I going to do when she finds out, Zelgadis thought.


Notes

So... What'd ya'll think? I tried to put it as closely to Ranma 1/2's story as I could. Well instead of just having a curse of being a girl, it's a chimera girl. Who would want to leave out Zel's chimera side? :P

Anywho, if you bothered to read this piece of crap, thanx. I would even be more thankful if you were nice enough to review. I don't know if I'll continue this or not. I guess it's up to the readers. I may, I may not. Who knows? I don't. ^_^

Oh and about Phibrizzo's little changing... you'll see where that's coming from in the next chapter.

In the next chapter: Well... Zel takes a bath... and well, if you've read the Ranma 1/2 story, you'll know what happens next. BWAHAHAHAHA! ^o^

Ahem... Anyways.

P.S. If you don't know who's who, here's the run down:

Zelgadis-Ranma
Lina-Akane
Rezo/Koppi-Genma
Phibrizzo-Soun
Filia-Nabiki
Syphiel-Kasumi

I'm not even sure if I should continue with this one. The results... they just aren't that satisfying. I don't know.

I hoped you guys enjoyed it a bit, even if only a bit.

Thanx for reading.

Ciao. ^_~


Chapter 2   |   Fanfiction