Chapter 3


Lina stood infront of a crowd of the towns unwed(and some wed) men. A stage had been set up in the middle of this melee for Lina to stand on. Behind her was a small tent that was usually reserved for the use of fortune telling and had seen much better days.

"Lina-san?" Amelia called. Lina waved her off. She called again and got a fist planted into her face. That caused gravity to finish off what Lina started. Amelia fell onto her back, taking the heavy picture of Filia down with her. Oddly enough, it looked like it had been painted by a monkey.

"Not helping you know," Lina groused, a dangerously impatient look marked her face. You know, the one before people resulted in the receiving end of a fireballed?

"Sorry," Amelia weezed back, the oppressive force of the painting cutting off circulation to vital organs. Lina shrugged and turned her attention back to the crowd of men.

"For one night only, some lucky guy in the crowd can have a date with this girl right here!" Lina announced in the most grandest voice she could. Most of the towns folk in the crowd just stared dumbly up at her.

"That girl on the ground?" someone from the crowd asked. Lina's face turned a nasty shade of red and her eyebrow twitched in annoyance.

"NO YOU MORON! The girl in the picture. A date with the girl in the picture!"

"You know," someone whispered, "that's a really ugly painting." Unfortunately, Lina overheard that comment and flare arrowed the guy.

"I'll have you know that I was the one who drew that picture." Lina stated with her hands on her hips. The unfortunate one didn't say anything, he just tipped over, burnt through.

A sob cut through the air. The crowd turned to their left to see a long, blond haired girl come running past. The crowd parted like some kinda sea, letting the crying girl run past and away. A silence fell on the crowd.

That's Filia thought Lina, scratching her head in confusion. Oh, well, can't let the opertunaty go to waste, now what sort of buisness woman would I be?

"There's the lucky girl right now!" she cried, pointing to the retreating dragon maiden's back. A brief hesitation ensued. Just one more little push!

"Now, if you'd just take a number, and line up in a straight line, well get to you soon."

The crowd of guys surged up the step to form a line next to the tent. Along with the sounds of foots stomping, the sound of heavy objects hitting skulls as some of the men's wives and girl friends hit them up side the head for being an incensitive, callous, chauvinistic, egotistical jerk. I digress... ^_^;

Lina and Amelia gave themselves one moment to sweat drop at the sight before attending to buisness.


Zelgadiss felt like pulling out his needle sharp hair. He couldn't believe - wouldn't believe - the scene infront of him. He checked his temperature. Normal for him. Also his pulse. He rubbed his eyes and pinched as hard as he could at his stone skin, wondering if he was coming down with something.

Nope, reality. Not a dream, thought I certainly wish it were so he thought. I wonder if that bashing with Filia's mace was the one that caused this?

Xelloss took this moment to run into the lounge room which was more or less empty except for Gourry and Zelgadiss. He glanced at the Trickster-Priest and noted that he was holding Filia's mace in one hand and he had come running in instead of just popping up.

For once, the Trickster Priest seemed a bit pre-occupied. He did have impecable timing, however, and always up to tease Zelgadiss as much as possible, he ambled over.

"Who's winning?" he asked, more out of curiousity. He didn't actually care who won or not, it's was just what any person would say. That was before he heard who was winning.

Zelgadiss tensed, then slumped down in defeat. Using a wooden arrow, he pointed it at a goofily grinning Gourry.

"What?!" Xelloss choaked. His throat was still a bit sore from having laughed himself silly a few minutes ago but this was too good to pass up. Thus, Xelloss-hyena he be. Again.

Zelgadiss was more or less expecting this from the stupid Mazoku and defenestrated him free of charge.

"It's your move Zelgadiss," Gourry called out, as always, oblivious to his friend's mood or the quick cameo made by Xelloss. Zelgadiss stiffened and clenched his fist. The need to punch something becomeing almost overwhelming.

He stalked back to the table and sat down stiffly. He moved one of his pieces. Gourry topped him. And so it continued -

Yes, this was going to be a long day indead...


"Filia! Filia-chan!" Xelloss called. He had taken to air using the force of Zelgadiss' throw, thinking that'd be the way to spot her. He had been hoping to follow a path of distruction that was usually associated with the Golden Dragon after getting mad at him. Nothing.

This time frame being mid-morning, Xelloss had pretty much the rest of the day ahead of him to search. This convienently being the longest day of the year was also helpful.

How couldn't I miss spotting that selfish dragon? With her snotty Ryuzoku ways. Why should I even care about her? I served her tea and tried to be nice to her, heck, I'm even returning the mace she uses to pummel me He shifted the said mace to his other shoulder.

She did confind in me though, she should know better than to trust a Mazoku he added with a little venom. At any given moment, I could finish what I started and kill her like I did to the rest of her kind He dipped lower when he though he saw her and recoiled in the air. It wasn't her, but whoever it was just ran into a crowd of maybe a five hundred blonds. Half with long hair.

"Yare, yare," Xelloss sighed. He snapped his fingers, realizing that he could just do some sort of finding spell or something. A moment later, he sped off towards the forest, mace and staff weighing him down.

"Baka. BAka. BAka. BAKA!!!" Filia screamed. All around, the forest fell silent to the sound of the golden dragon's screaming. A chicken popped up from the bushes, took one look at her and ran. [1] Filia was emitting a very scarry amount of blue aura. She looked like a mess. She felt like a mess. She wanted to mess Xelloss up.

She settled for crying her eyes out by a near by stream she had stopped by when she got tired of running. What she needed right now was some major alone time after what happened this morning.

"Stupid, stupid namagomi!" she vented. Then more quietly, "Stupid, stupid ryuzoku... Should of known better..."

She knew better. She should of known better. You've become too trusting of him after he saved you from that explosion [2] she berrating herself. This journey-ing wasn't all it was cracked up to be. She gets jailed - twice - was called a thief, almost had a coronary when Lina destroyed a part of the Dragon Shrine, had to travel with a shudder Mazoku and said Mazoku knew her deepest, darkest fear.

She sighed at her bad luck.

A snapping sound marked the entrance of someone/something. Filia sprang up, berrating herself even more for leaving her mace next to hyena-Xelloss. This left her vulnerable to any attacks that might come. She doubted that she would have enough time to build up any powerful spell.

This is all your fault, Namagomi! she though bitterly.

A familiar fox like man appeared, slightly stunning the Ryuzoku.

"Jirasu?" asked a bewildered dragon maiden, she got into what she hoped was a menacing stance that she had seen some people do in the last town that Lina and crew had visited. Nervana? Ner-somethingorother.

"Filia-san? Can I ask you something important?" he asked shyly, slightly fidgiting. Filia relaxed slightly. At the moment, the fox man wasn't after the Sword of Light and didn't really impose any threat to her. At the moment.


Xelloss flew towards the woods on the outskirts of town. His altitude was starting to get lower and lower as time passed. A bead of sweat that wasn't from stress appeared on his forehead.

"I'm getting too old," he grimanced, pushing out a burst of energy to maintain some altitude.

How does Filia-chan carry this thing all the time? he pondered incuriously. I wonder why I should care so much about returning this stupid mace to that - BIRD! His flying suffered the distraction and he tilted off to the side to avoid getting impailed by a bird. He shook his head violently, deciding that the bird wasn't worth the energy to flip it the 'bird'. (Author groans and hits her head on the desk repeatedly.)

I know I'm getting too soft when I start to - WHAM!!!

At first he thought that Filia had snuck up and hit him with Mace-Sama until he realized that 1)Mace-Sama was with him and 2)All his daydreaming had caused him to fly into a tree. Thus, Mazoku meets ground.

"Itai," he sighed, hitting the ground from about fifteen stories up. Just his luck that he had been able to hit the tallest tree in the forest.

That wasn't the worst of it, gravity took hold of Mace-Sama and it landed on his stomach. He might of been able to with stand, even love, great amounts of pain but this was rediculous and neither the best time nor the greatest place.

Nighty, night to the Mazoku.


Amelia was having second doubts about Lina-sans plans for Filia's date. After about seeing fifty guys come in, they couldn't seem to agree or narrow down the field of contestants.

Amelia wanted some one dashing and brave, someone who'll defend the world with justice and a loving heart. A silhouette of a figure not unlike Zelgadiss appeared...

...Lina wanted someone who'd listen to what Filia says and does. Basicly good fighter, good looking, smart, rich beyond belief - and if he hurts her, then Lina will Dragu Slave his butt. She left out the last part, no need to clutter up expectations.

"I say that Filia-san needs someone with a good heart!" said Amelia. Lina scowled. Amelia scowled back. A blue spark of competative energy shot between them. The last interviewee managed to crawl away with his life before things got really, really ugly.

"A fighter has a good heart! It's running isn't it? I still say that Filia needs someone who's a good fighter!" she countered back, hands on hips.

"Heart!"

"Fighter!"

"Heart!"

"Fighter!"

"HEART!"

"FIRE BALL!"

A frazzled looking Lina came out of the tent she was using for the interviews. Tossing her hair to the side with a slightly burnt gloved hand, she smiled smugly.

"Next please!" she chirped. Inside the tent, Amelia sighed.

"You're are so mean Lina-san," she whimpered, struggling at the rope bonds that held her arms and legs together.


"Ugghh - stop the ride, I wanna get off," Xelloss groaned, smacking his head to stop the world from spinning. [3] He settled for closing his slitted purple eyes from the blurred images. He placed a gloved hand against a tree, more acurately the one that he crashed into, to steady himself. From what little luck he had, the tree didn't tip over.

Xelloss streached, feeling his joints pop in five different places. He was snapping his wrist back into place when he heard the sound of voices nearby. One was very familiar and it played at the edge of his mind before he could recognize it.

"Filia." He breathed a sigh of relief. She sounded close enough so that he wouldn't have to fly again with her stupid mace. Hopefully, never again. He cast the big spiked iron ball a glare, he'd come back fore it later.

Brushing himself off, he followed to where the voices seemed to be coming from. Come to think of it, the second voice was also familiar.

Filia and Jirasu turned to look at him. Both had a scornful look on their faces at the sight of the Mazoku general-priest. Filia turned up her nose at him. Which wasn't all that unusual.

"Filia-chan!" Xelloss called out brightly, lopping towards them. He stopped at about a meter away, his hand scratching the back of his head in that half embarrassed way of his.

"What do you want Mazoku," she said bittingly. Jirasu moved infront of her as if he was going to protect her from him Mazoku.

"Don't worry, Fi-chan, dear. I will get rid of this awful Mazoku for you," Jirasu said in what Xelloss comprehended as a brave voice. It was comical until what Filia did a moment later.

Her eyes turned to hearts and she clasped her hands infront of her and... squealed. Xelloss jaw hit the ground and he stared, feeling an on-coming twitch.

Not once, even when he was out of her sight range did he ever hear her squeal. It was extreamly high pitched and just radiated shudder cuteness. Something that maybe Amelia would do when she thought of justice or maybe more along the lines of Martina when she had that obsessive crush on him.

"Are you okay, Filia-chan?" he asked, his disarming smile turning to one of bewildered concern.

"Don't Filia-chan her," snipped Jirasu, drawing out a bomb.

"Go get that awful, awful Namagomi!" Filia cheered, golden dragon's tail sticking out with big, cute eyes that had stars in them. She went SD and began jumping around.

"Awful, awful, Namagomi..." Xelloss muttered, twitching a bit. He jumped back in a mixture of disgust and fright. Oh, my. I think I broke her brain.

"What's wrong with you lizard lips?!" he demanded in a panicky voice. She drew back in shock. Tears gushing from her eyes like a waterfall, a crushed look lining her face. Jirasu turned an interresting shade of red even though he was a red fox.

"No one talks to my fiancée like that!" he cried dramaticly, stricking a dramatic pose. What else?

"Yeah!!" Filia cheered, popping up with two fans with chibi-Jirasu's in the middle. All remnants of tears gone or forgotten. Mostly the latter.

"Fi-fi-fiancée?" Xelloss choaked. "When did this happen?!" He jumped in alarm when Filia popped up and grabbed his arm and shook it in excitement.

"Just right now, isn't he so sweet. He declaired his love for me right just before you came. He's the one who sent me that very sweet love letter, tee-hee."

Tee-hee? Xelloss grimanced inwardly, feeling something like an ulcer form and his teeth begining to rot.

"Nani?! I thought you hated love letters?!"

Filia pouted and turned away. "That was before dear, sweet Jirasu-chan asked to marry me. And you're not invited to the wedding, so there!"

"What did you do to her?" the now angry Trickster Priest demanded, not sure if he could take anymore of the emotional rush that was eminating from the Dragon Priestess.

"I admited that I love her, which is more to say than you've ever done." Then for good measure. "Jerk."

"What the hell is that suppose to mean?!" Xelloss cried in frustration.

"Language!" Filia scolded to both of them. Jirasu looked down at his feet in shame. Xelloss shook his head. This is too weird he thought. Even for me He turned around and grabbed Filia's shoulders, much to her chagrin. She screamed, flipped up her skirt and brandished Mace-Sama.

Xelloss jumped back in exhuberance, hitting his palm with something close to inspiration.

"I get it! This isn't real. I left Mace-Sama back at that really big tree! This is just some twisted dream in my mind!" he cried.

"This isn't Mace-Sama!" cried Filia, tears streaming down her face in rivers. Again. That stopped Xelloss cold.

"This is Mace-Sama II!"

With the introductions finish, she swung Mace-Sama II. It connect with Xelloss' skull, sending flying into darkness.

Thus, the Priest of Zelas went night, night. Again.


"Does this mean I win?" Gourry asked in a dazed voice. (i.e. regular voice) Zelgadiss twitched, trying not to hit the other man. With all his will power he nodded a yes, feeling the stones grind against each other. Gourry grinned.

"Wow, wait till I tell Lina!" he cried excitedly. The other patrons smiled in congratulations as they passed by.

I can't believe I lost Zelgadiss griped, his hand twitching where it lay next to the shogi board. To GOURRY! Of all people, Gourry! Sumoning all his strength, he looked up.

"How. About. Another. Game. Gourry?" he asked through gritted teeth. The blond swordsman smiled, setting up the board again, compleately oblivious to his companions discomfort.

This time I know I'll win


Notes

1 - Not to be disrespectfull or anything but if you say it four times fast like that, you're bound to get some chickens. Too bad for her that the chicken got scared away. Mace comes out of a plot hole and hits author

2 - I'm reffering to the one in episode 10. You know? The kids with the Madoki?

3 - He wasn't hitting himself hard enough to wake himself up from his nightmare- ano, would that be considered more of a delusion?


Chapter 4   |   Fanfiction