Zelgadis stood out in the pouring rain, time and again looking at the small house near the lake. He was soaked, he was sick, and he was sure if he asked he could get shelter. But his feet just wouldn't move.
It's been so long. How can I go back after all this time? I was such a fool before, believe pretty lies. How... how will he react? What will he think of me?
The shaman sneezed, pulling the soggy cloak closer around his shoulders. A part of him said he should leave. Whatever befell him now, he deserved it. But his heart was tugging him in another direction; he hadn't realized he'd knocked on the door until he heard the echo of it whispering into the howling storm. There was nothing to it, so he waited, surprised that he didn't bolt when the door was flung open.
Always it was the eyes Zel saw first. But there was no judgement in those depths. No condemnation for his past. Only shock, surprise, and... could it be? Hope...?
"Zel?!"
The chimera lowered his eyes, sniffling a little before he spoke.
"'allo, Gourry..."
Before he knew it, Zel was ushered into the swordsman's home, his soaking cloak taken from him as Gourry all but pushed Zel towards the fire.
"Gourry..."
"You're drenched. You'll get sick if you don't try and warm up. I know swords and stuff don't hurt you, but I'm betting you can still get sick."
"I'm not... I..." Zel tried to stifle it, but there was no mistaking the almost delicate sneeze.
"No arguments, Zel. You're already sick. How long where
you out there anyway?" Gourry sat Zel close to the fire,
running out to grab a few towels and blankets. He brings it back
to Zel, along with a change of clothes. "You know, you
shouldn't travel when you're sick, Zel. What happens if you got
attacked or something? And you're probably traveling alone, too,
aren't
you?"
Zel lowered his head, unable to meet Gourry's concerned eyes. When he didn't answer, Gourry just shrugged at began helping Zel out of his wet clothes. All his clothes were too big for the chimera, so Gourry had simply given him a tunic and wrapped him in several blankets to try and get the chill from him.
"Just stay there for awhile. I'll go see what I have to cook..."
"Gourry." Zel finally lifted his eyes, causing Gourry to nearly flinch from the pain he saw. "...why are you doing this? I... I left. Why do this?"
"You really have to ask, Zel?" Gourry kneeled down, touching the tip of Zel's nose as he smiled. "I never thought you went on your own. I figured he was manipulating you. It's what Xelloss does. But I knew eventually you'd see the truth. I was just waiting for you to get back."
"But still... why?"
Gourry cocked his head. "Why? Because I care, Zel." With that, he walked to the kitchen, leaving Zel to ponder the new twist of fate.
Zel stared at the fire, his hands curled around a mug of coffee. Gourry had been attending him hand and foot, never letting him move from the comfort of the fireplace. And he had to admit, he was feeling better. Still sick, but better. But the last thing he wanted to do was bring more work to his friend...
Friend. Did he even deserve to think of Gourry as that anymore? He didn't feel he should, but Gourry had other ideas.
Because I care, Zel.
But why, Gourry? Why do you care? I... I left. Why do you still care?
"Zel?"
Zel jumped, nearly spilling his coffee. He looked up into the concerned gaze of the blond, fighting back the sudden burn of tears. Stop that. You've done enough of that to last three lifetimes. No more, Greywers, you hear?
"You seemed like you were somewhere else."
"I was."
"Ah." Gourry shrugged and sat down next to Zel. Before he could collect his equilibrium, Gourry shifted to rest his head on the startled chimera's shoulder.
"Gourry..."
"Did you love him, Zel?"
That was not a question he ever expected to hear. Zel swallowed, taking a large gulp of coffee to buy him time and perhaps courage. In truth, he'd rather face Zanaffar stark naked with a table knife than answer that question. But this was Gourry asking, and if he owed anybody answers it was him.
"I... I thought it was love. If... if I'm honest with myself, I think it was for me. Or perhaps just blind infatuation. I didn't think..."
"I did."
"I thought you should have... that you deserved better."
"Don't know if I deserve it or not, but I want you."
Zel went quiet again. He wasn't sure want to do or say. Then it dawned on him. "Want...?"
"Want. I knew you'd come back. I knew he couldn't keep fooling you forever. He didn't love you. I'm sorry he hurt you, though."
"It's... it's my own fault..."
"Shh..." Gourry reached up, placing a finger to Zel's lips. He smiled, brushing away the single tear Zel didn't know was trailing over his cheek. "Don't worry about blaming anyone. You're here now. That's all that matters. Just try and warm up and I'll get dinner for you as soon as it's done." Gourry settled back, his head once again on Zel's shoulder. The chimera closed his eyes, slowly moving until his cheek lay against the soft gold mane. He didn't see the faint smile that played across Gourry's lips.
Xelloss lost you, and now that you're back, I'm not letting him take you, ever.
Zel sat there, pondering the turns his life seemed to be taking. Unconsciously, his hand rose up to stroke Gourry's hair. He took a deep breath, admiring the scent clinging to the gold strands.
He smells like a forest right after the rain; everything clean and new...
He felt Gourry move closer, nearly causing Zel's brain to shut down from the proximity. Gourry...
"Zel? What happened? How did you come back here?"
At first Zel didn't understand the question. A moment later, he sighed and looked at the fire. He tried to find away around answering, but Gourry himself provided a temporary escape.
"Oops! Forgot about dinner. Don't move, you're still sick, I think." Gourry jumped up, running to the kitchen. Zel sat with a slight emptiness at the lose of contact.
Like you should even have it in the first place. You are an eternal fool, Greywers.
Gourry came back, balancing two bowls as he knelt back down to Zel's level. Zel quickly took them both, letting Gourry take a seat before handing one back.
"It's not much, just a stew. I'm not the best cook around, but I get by."
"It's okay, Gourry. I'm sure it will be fine." Zel took a few spoonfuls, thinking it was rather good. Unfortunately, he found he didn't have much of an appetite. He set the bowl aside, much to Gourry's concern.
"Was it that bad?"
"Nono! Wasn't that..." Zel shook his head quickly, and instantly regretted it. The room spun around him in lazy spirals. He fell against Gourry, who placed a hand on Zel's forehead.
"Not good. This feels warm, even for you, I think. To bed, Zel."
Any other time, that last statement would either make Zel blush or chuckle. Right now he thought it was the best idea he'd heard in a while. He didn't protest as Gourry slid an arm around his waist and guided the chimera to his bedroom.
"Where you going to sleep..."
"Don't worry about me, you just need some rest." Gourry pulled the blankets back, lowering the rapidly drifting Zel to the bed. He put only a very light blanket over Zelgadis, checking to make sure he was comfortable. "Need anything?"
"Uh-uh..." Zel's eyes were half closed already, his illness taxing the last of his strength. "Thanks..."
"Sleep Zel. I'll be here."
Zel didn't need any more coaxing. He turned to his side, asleep in moments. Gourry watched him before grabbing a couple of blankets and lying on the floor.
First things first, have to get you well. Then we'll see how he hurt you, so maybe we can fix that, too. It will be okay, Zel. You'll see.
Dawn broke, casting a single ray of light directly on Zel's eyes. He blinked, turning over with a muffled curse. His head was killing him, and he felt like his brain was floating around on the Demon's Sea.
"ugh..."
"Zel? Zelgadis?"
"unh..."
Swearing, Gourry got up quickly to check on the chimera. His hand told him the fever was even worse. Gourry had to fight back a surge of panic. While he knew what to do if a human were catching a cold, he didn't have the foggiest idea if any of that would work for Zel. And he didn't want to leave him alone to go look for a mage who might know.
And I don't use magic. Time to do this the old fashion way. Gods, I hate this...
Gourry first went to get a cold washcloth, coming back to lay it on Zel's forehead. "Zel, I need you to turn over..."
"Light.. hurts..."
"Wha...?" Gourry looked, watching the sun rising over the mountains in the distance. "Oh, sorry. I'm use to it, I guess." He quickly drew a curtain over it, dimming the room. "Better?"
Silently, Zel turned over, feeling too awful to answer unless needed. Gourry helped him to a slight reclining position before placing the washcloth on Zel. The blond couldn't help running his fingers through Zel's bangs, moving them away so he could see both eyes.
Funny, I never noticed how we both kept that eye covered...
"S-sorry."
"What?" Gourry frowned, wondering if Zel was worse off than he thought. "Sorry about what, Zel?"
"Didn't mean... cause more trouble..."
"Oh, Zel." Sighing, Gourry covered Zel's hand with his own. "Don't think like that. Just concentrate on getting better, okay? I'll be right back." He gave Zel's hand a reassuring squeeze before getting up. He went outside and around back to where a pair of messenger birds were kept.
Knew these would come in handy. Gourry wrote a short note, then secured it to one of the birds, sending it off to Seyruun. I don't care if I have to deal with Amelia again, just hurry.
A few miles down the road Zel traveled, a figure suddenly appeared.
Finally. I'm surprised, Zel-kun. I didn't think you could hide your presence so easily. But now that I've found your trail, what do I say? One thing's for sure, I'm not going to just let you go after all I did to get you. You're mine, little chimera, as you should be.
Gourry replaced the washcloth for the umpteenth time. Zel's fever had gotten worse and it was the only thing he could do short of just dunking the chimera to try and keep it under control.
Don't want to do that. It might throw him into shock.
He stayed by Zel's side as much as he could, leaving only when he had to. He tried getting Zel to eat, but Zel refused. He tossed and turned violently on the bed for a while, until his strength left him whimpering softly. Gourry sighed and helps to strip Zel down to bare necessities. The shaman's skin was hot and clammy to the touch, causing Gourry's concern to triple.
I've seen him get sick before, but it was always mild. Nothing like this. What happened to you, Zel?
Zel shifted on the bed again, echoing a sound caught halfway between a sob and a moan. Gourry leaned closer, trying to understand.
"Xe... Xel... why... please... no..."
At that moment, Gourry's world was reduced to two emotions. Anguish at whatever had happened to the chimera before he found his way here, and hatred for the one responsible. He forced himself to take a deep, calming breath, trying to steady himself and quiet the urge to run out with the Sword of Light and skewer a certain violet eyed Mazoku.
Not now, Gabriev. Zel's the one who needs you. That can wait.
Zel curled in on himself, his body trembling. Frowning, Gourry moved to unfold him, pulling up short when he realized the reason for Zel's tremors.
Cr-crying?! Zel...
"Zel, what is it? Does it hurt that bad? What's wrong? Please, I just want to help."
Zel only shook his head, trying to scoot away from Gourry. The blond figured Zel's illness might be causing him to become slightly irrational, if not delusional. He tried again, his voice softer.
"Zel, it's me, it's Gourry. Do you know where you are? You're in my home, remember? You came last night, it was raining. I was afraid you'd get sick. Remember that?"
It seemed a lifetime to Gourry before the chimera made a small noise of agreement. Least that's what Gourry hoped it was.
"You're safe now, Zel. It's okay. I'm going to take care of you..."
"Wh-why...? Left you... lied to... me... a fool... Gourry..."
"Shh... It's okay." Gourry was a man of emotions and instincts. Seeing his friend lying brokenhearted on the bed, there was only one thing for him to do. He carefully pulled Zel into his arms, noting still the heat radiating from the slender, quivering form. "It will be okay, Zel. You'll see. Just try and get some rest for now. I'll be here."
Gourry continued to whisper softly, his hand stroking Zel's hair. Eventually, the chimera calmed down and slipped into a light sleep. Gourry laid him back on the bed, going to dampen the washcloth again.
If I ever find you, I don't care how I do it, you're dead, Xelloss.
At that moment, the figure on the road began walking, following some left behind energy from Zel's inherent magick. Unknown to it or the occupants of the house, another form arrived right after and proceeded to follow.
Oh no. Not again. You've troubled me for the last time.
The sun began to set when the messenger bird landed right at the window of Gourry's bedroom. Zel was already asleep, exhausted from trying to eat something earlier. He tried to protest, not wanting to be such a burden, but Gourry just pushed him back to bed.
"It's okay, Zel. You ate enough, I think. Just rest."
So Zel went back to bed obediently, falling asleep within moments. While his fever didn't rise, nor did it lower, leaving Gourry to worry the rest of the day. He nearly sobbed with relief when he saw the bird. He cradled the creature carefully as he pulled the message away.
Mister Gourry,
I was surprised to hear from you, and really worried when I read
your letter. I'll be there by the tonight. The shining star of
justice will guide me through! Please tell Mister Zelgadis to
have a courageous heart and justice will surely be there to help
him.
- Amelia
Gourry hid a smile. It was good to know some things would never change. He folded the message up and tucked it in his pocket. Hurry Amelia. Please...
A small groan from the pillow had Gourry over by the bedside in a flash. "Zel?" He watched as the chimera lifted his head up weakly. Gourry noted his red, teary eyes and reached for another washcloth. Better wash again real quick.
"G-gou..."
"Easy, Zel. You're still sick..."
"Don'... don't want to sleep..."
"Huh?" Gourry frowned at strange statement. "What do you mean? You need to rest..."
"Please... no sleep... don't want to... Not alone..."
Gourry flinched at the sheer desperation in Zel's eyes. He moved, holding Zel up until he could sit on the bed, Zel's head resting in his lap. "Shh, it's okay. I'm not going anywhere."
"P-promise?"
"Promise. Do you... feel like talking about it, Zel? About what's got you so scared?" Gourry hated the choice of word, but it was all he could think of.
"Xel... Xelloss left me... alone... and pain... something... I..." Zel shivered violently, causing Gourry to pull Zel into the blond's comforting embrace. "He... I..."
"Let it go, Zel. Whatever it is, whatever it was, it won't hurt you. I won't let it."
"Just don't... not alone... okay?"
"Okay. Just try and rest for me?"
Zel nodded, his eyes drifting close once more. Gourry sighed and simply held the still form in his arms, his eyes gazing out to the stars. He didn't see the two figures making their way closer to the house. The first stopped abruptly, feeling something nagging at it's senses, but saw nothing when it looked.
"Odd, thought I... Doesn't matter. My darling is waiting for me." With that, the figure disappeared down the road, a flash of red colored by the dying sun.
"Damnit!"
The figure ducked behind some nearby bushes just as a fine, noble-looking steed carrying a less than noble-looking princess galloped by. Swearing, the figure walked back out once the horse and rider were a distance away.
"Damn damn damn damn DAMN! What the hell is she doing here? Now I have to deal with little-miss-justice brat too. Not that it's going to matter. What's mine is mine, and nobody is going to stand in my way."
The figure continued down the road, being shadowed all the way
Gourry was still holding Zel when he awoke again, even weaker than before but more coherent. He blinked owlishly when he saw where he was exactly and looked up at Gourry. "Gou...rry?"
"How do you feel?"
"Like hell. What happened?"
"You were really upset about something, I'm not quite sure what..." Gourry bit his lip, wondering just how much he should let Zel know about what the chimera spoke of. He may not have waned me to know at all... man, hate this tough thinking...
"I see. What did I say?"
"Gourry looked carefully into Zel's eyes, trying to find some clue as to how to proceed. The only thing the moon reflected in those liquid blue depths was an honest curiosity without any more than the usual remorse Gourry always hated to see lurking there. With a sigh, Gourry thought about the fragments from earlier.
"You were pretty out of it, Zel. All I can really tell you is you were crying out in your sleep. Something about Xelloss. When you woke up and I asked you about it, you said Xelloss left you alone and something... hurt you." Gourry's expression became hard, his eyes looking somewhere else. "Zel? Did Xelloss... Did he... hurt you? I mean... did he...?"
Zel gave a short, quick shake of his head, understanding what Gourry was stumbling over. "He didn't rape me or anything, if that's what you mean. In fact, he acted like he didn't know what I was talking about. That's what hu... what bothered me the most. I couldn't seem to make him understand that something was going on every time he left. I think maybe he felt I was trying to hold onto him too much. Before... before I finally left, I was, but not for the reasons he thought. I... I just... something was trying to hurt me, and I didn't know what..."
Something about the last sentence made Gourry suspicious, but he decided to let it be for the time. Confessions always seem to take a lot out of Zel when he's healthy, so no telling what this did in his current state. "I think I get it. Look, Amelia's going to be here soon..."
"A-Amelia?! But why...?"
"Because you're sick and I didn't..."
"But I'll heal, I always do..." Zel tried to prove his point by getting out of bed. Gourry gasped and tried to push him back, but he chimera's own weakness sent him tumbling into the sheets before he could orient himself. "Kuso..."
"This proves it. You're sick and need help and she's already on her way. She's as worried as I am, Zel. She just wants to help."
Zel closed his eyes, forcing back a nameless despair that had no visible face. "Gourry, promise me something? I know I'm the last one to ask for promises, but..."
"You're too hard on yourself, Zel. What is it? Anything I can do..."
"Don't... don't tell her why I'm here. I mean, not about Xelloss or anything. I'm not ready, not yet."
"I know. Already told her I just ran into you, that's all." Gourry watched Zel sip under again, worried about the on/off sleeping. I wonder when's the last time he got a decent amount of sleep, anyway.
Gourry started at the loud knock on the door. His heart jumped to his throat as he ran for the door, a part of him somewhat happy at the thought of having two of his traveling companions back around him. He flung open the door, allowing a panting Amelia to nearly fall in his arms.
"Amelia!"
"Mister Gourry! S-sorry I'm late..."
"It's okay, not like I'm close to Seyruun. I'm just glad you could come like this."
"Justice will always come when needed! Where the darkness of evil lurks, justice will be there to shine it's healing light!" At this, Amelia stumbled again, falling into Gourry's outstretched arms.
"Don't know about lurking evil, Amelia, but it's Zel that needs the healing now, okay?"
"Ah, sure." The princess got up quickly and followed Gourry back to the bedroom.
If Lina were here, it'd be like old time...
Zel stared up at the ceiling, no longer able to sleep. He was exhausted, sure, but just couldn't sleep anymore. So he simply waited, listening to Gourry welcoming Amelia in.
It's been so long. I wonder how she's been. I can hear her... Still the champion of justice. Maybe if we're lucky, that will never change. We need someone who believes in that.
And what do you believe in, Greywers? What is it that you can fall back on when everything else comes crashing down on you? Xelloss? The shaman snorted, rolling to his side to gaze out the window. Yeah, right. How often was he called away by his boss? He said he... but he warned me before that her wishes had to come first. Warned me that we had to keep it a secret. How much danger I'd be in if I did this. Why didn't I listen? Why did I...
Zel shivered, pulling the sheet around him despite his high fever. Why did I walk away from Gourry like that? He asked... he begged me to stay. Did he know? Did he know it could never work between me and Xelloss? Maybe, but I don't think he knew why I left...
Despair quickly turned to frustration as Zel hit an ineffectual fist against the bed. Damnit, he deserves better. He should be married by now, teaching a bunch of sons how to swing a sword, or watching a bunch of daughters learn a new spell. He should be with someone who deserves to be at his side. Someone who doesn't have to hide either their face or the fact that they love him. Someone...
...someone other than me.
The shaman closed his eyes, but the tears came unbidden. They slid over his cheeks, sparkling one in the moonlight before gathering on the bed in a pile of semi-precious gemstones.
Gourry, I had to leave. I deserved someone like Xelloss. You needed better. I had to...
A dark, prickly feeling causes his hair to stand on end. Zel gasped as old fears emerged seemingly from out of nowhere. His eyes dart quickly to the window, but his demon sight sees nothing.
But I know. I know what I feel. L-sama. It's found me. Here... with Gourry... no...
Gourry rolled his eyes as Amelia chattered away about what the "light of Justice" has lt her accomplish since they last saw each other. Still, he had to admit he liked hearing the noise, if for the familiarity it brought with it.
Funny, I don't remember her being as free about talking when we all traveled before. Ah well. He smiled at the young girl as he led her to the bedroom. "It sounds like a lot has happened..."
"Oh, yes! When I got back to Seyruun, I started really practicing me magic, especially what Mr. Zelgadis taught me. I learned more from him than I did from Miss Lina, if I'm really honest about it..."
No kidding. Did Lina even really try and teach you? "Well I'm sure Zel will be happy to hear about it."
"I hope so! I've missed seeing him ever since we all left. I know once he's better, he'll be ready to join the fight against the evil that tries to cover the lands, but justice and a steadfast heart will never fail!"
"Well let him recover first, then we'll see about the evil part." Gourry hid a chuckle as he knocked on the door. "Zel, Amelia's here to..." He stopped as he pushed the door open to an empty room, the window wide open. "Damn!"
"What? What is...?" Amelia peeked inside, her eyes widening at the implications. "I thought he was sick..."
"He is! He shouldn't be outside. It's still cold!" Gourry strides over to the bed, fear churning heavily in his stomach. A letter addressed to him lies on the rumpled bed. He snatches it up, his eyes already falling to hastily scribbled words.
Gourry,
I'm sorry, I hate doing this again after what happened the first
time, but now I have no choice. Whatever it was that hurt me, it's
back, and it's coming for me again. I couldn't put you and Amelia's
life in danger like that. I have to go, then you'll be safe.
Maybe one day I'll gather the strength and find my way back, but
if not... Forgive me, I couldn't help feeling this way. I don't
deserve to say this, and you'll hate me for it.
I love you.
-- Zel
Damn you, Zel. Why do yo keep running! If you love me, stay and let me help you. You don't have to keep doing this alone!
"He was sick, so he can't have gotten too far. Up for a search?"
Amelia nods. "We have to. Mister Zelgadis needs us."
Yes, but can we get him to see that? Gourry grabs a blanket, then heads for the front door. He grabs his sword from the wall on the way, feeling the familiar weight of it in his hand. I know I wanted to hold it again, but not like this... Together, he and Amelia made they're way out into the moonlit night.
What? Moving? No, no you're mine. Mine and mine alone. You'll see, I'm the only one you need.
The figure raced on, a violet shadow hot on it's heels.
It seemed he was always in pain in one form or another, didn't it?
Zel ran near blindly through the woods, not caring where he was going so long as he got as far away from Gourry's home as possible. He didn't dare look back to check. The only thing that mattered was speed and distance.
Unfortunately, speed was not to be had in his condition.
His vision, while better than any human's on an average day, was now swimming from exertion and illness. The fever didn't help at all, causing him no end of dizzy spells and leaving him panting for air. The normally lithe and graceful chimera was now stumbling along, sometimes using the trees to keep him from falling over. By all rights he should just collapse, but he couldn't. He had to keep going. He had to get whatever was hounding him as far away from Gourry and Amelia as possible.
Forgive me, Gourry. I really did want to stay this time. But I can't let you get hurt because of my mistakes.
And out here, freezing in the uncaring forest, Zel knew it had been a mistake. No, he still didn't think he was good enough for Gourry, but he knew accepting Xelloss' offer was not the smartest thing he'd done.
Understatement. You're a damn fool, Greywers. L-sama herself is laughing at you, I be...
A racking cough forced the shaman to stop, falling to his knees as he held his sides. Forever passed before it finally subsided, taking precious strength with it. Only force of will saw Zel staggering back to his feet. He began moving again, dangerously slower this time but determined to go no matter what.
I might be caught... hell, I will be caught... but Gourry won't suffer because of it.
Zel kept moving, watched by a melancholy moon hovering sadly over him
"Zel! Zelgadis!" "Mister Zelgadis! Can you here us?" "Zel, where are you?!"
Gourry and Amelia continued following the footprints they found outside the window. Gourry thanked every dragon god he could think of for the recent rains that made it easier to track the chimera. From the way the prints looked, Zel wasn't moving very fast, and wasn't too steady on his feet.
When we find you, first I'm going to hug you, then I'm going to tell you I love you, then I'm going to beat the hell out of you for doing this to me.
"Mister Gourry! Over here!"
"What is it, Amelia." Gourry jogged over to where the Seyruun princess was looking. "What did you find?"
"More tracks. They're leading into the woods." Gourry swore vividly, causing the young woman to blush. "M-Mister Gourry...?"
"Damn, it's going to be hard trying to find him in there. And he may be stone, but he's still sick. Who knows what can happen? Zel, why did you run away again?"
Amelia did a double take at the pain breaking through Gourry's tone. Mister Gourry must really be worried about him. Something didn't ring quite true about that, though, but she decided to let it go. Helping her friends was more important. "We'll find him, Mister Gourry. I know we will."
"We have to. He needs us." And he needs me. Zel, I find you this time, and I don't care if Shabranigdo himself comes back, I'm not letting you go.
Amelia casts a lighting spell, and the two head into the forest.
"Ah, you're cloak is gone now. Silly thing, you never did learn, did you? Don't worry, we'll have all of eternity to learn." With a laugh, the figure was gone. The shadow following it swore softly. He stepped out into the moonlight, tapping his staff in frustration.
"I was hoping the cloak would have lasted a little longer. But at least I know where she's going. Just have to get there first. In the meantime, maybe I can give him some food for thought." Sighing, he disappeared into dark space.
So tired.
Zel slumped down into the dirt, tears of exhaustion running down his face to sparkle back, laughing in the moonlight. He curled up against a tree, shivering from both cold and fear of what he knew was coming.
Still, better this than Gourry getting hurt. I can take anything, as long as he's safe.
Can you take never seeing him again?
He wasn't sure if the thought was his or from somewhere else, but it unnerved Zel none the less. He curled up even tighter, feeling the despair take him as it always did.
No... but if he's hurt... Isn't this hurting him too? Remember how he looked when you left the first time? But he got over it, right? And this is different. Why didn't you tell him the whole story? Why didn't you trust him? But it wasn't him... Just... I was ashamed, alright! He accepted you despite your looks, do you think this would have mattered? How would he have looked at me knowing I couldn't even defend myself? It wasn't your fault, we all have our strengths and weaknesses. I don't want to be weak... You're not, not where it counts. You have to learn that, and learn to accept what others give you. Rezo gave... Give from the heart. I'm... weak. So am I. Huh? You are my weakness, and I gave into it, hurting you because I didn't think about anything else. But I'm going to try and fix that. I don't understand... Just think about it. He's coming for you. You need him now, as he needs you. Who? Go to him...
Zel started, almost certain there had been another in his mind. Somewhere in the distance he could hear Amelia and Gourry calling for him. Instinct and habit made him want to run, but weariness of both held him in place.
He was tired of running. He'd been running ever since he was cursed and he was so tired of it. First from Rezo, then from himself, then from his heart, and now from Gourry.
Running hasn't solved it, has it? No. What is it you want? I just want to stop hurting. Please, I don't want to hurt any more. Then call him. But... He can help make it stop. ...promise? Yes.
Looking past his tears, Zel struggled until he could sit up. Though his voice was weak and barely carried, Zelgadis finally did the single most bravest thing in his life.
"Gourry..."
"Now what are you calling him for? He doesn't deserve you. You're mine. You were mine when we first met, and now it's time you come to learn that."
A strangled sob was the only answer as Zel looked up into a pair of glowing eyes. The wind picked up at that moment, caressing red tresses with a lover's hand. Despair and dread gave way to shock as a lighting spell finally showed him the face of the one he feared for so long.
"L-Lina...?!"
The sorceress stepped closer, her voice a low, dark purr. "Of course, Zel. Who else would know how to track you? That cloak you put up was very annoying, by the way."
"Cloak...? But I..."
"Don't want to hear it. I have you now and that's all that matters." Lina leaned close, her face above Zel's, her breath playing across his lips as he pressed himself back against the tree.
"You and I were meant to be together, Zel. We deserve each other. You'll see..."
The whisper of his name never reached Gourry's ears. Fortunately, the flash of light in the distance caught his attention.
"Amelia, you see that?"
"Hmm?" The princess looked to where Gourry pointed. "Looks like a lighting spell. You think it's Mister Zelgadis?"
"Probably Lina, most likely."
Both Gourry and Amelia spun around to a familiar and unwanted voice. Xelloss stood on a lower tree branch, looking down with an expression far removed from his usual winsome smile.
"Xelloss! I knew you had something to do with this! Where is he?! Where is Zel! If he's hurt..."
The trickster raised a hand, pausing Gourry's tirade. "It wasn't me."
"Yeah right."
Amelia looked between the two in total confusion. "I don't understand. What wasn't you? What's happened to Mister Zelgadis?" She blinks, remember what Xelloss said a moment before. "And what do you mean about Miss Lina? Is she here too?"
"Yes, but she is not the Lina you remember. She's the one who endangers Zel now, not me."
"And we're suppose to believe you?" Gourry already had his sword drawn, the enchanted blade illuminating the darkness. "And why would Lina want to hurt Zel anyway? Huh?!"
"Because, to put it bluntly, the power of the Giga Slave finally took it's toll on her mind. Do you honestly think a mere human, no matter how gifted, can cast a spell like that and it not eventually have some repercussions?"
At this, Gourry faltered. "What are you saying?"
"Lina cast the Giga Slave once successfully, that being only because your sword helped to focus it. She cast it again without it and brought the Lord of Nightmares into her body. At both times, for one moment, Lina's human mind was engulfed completely by oblivion. Surrounded by absolute nothing. Or so I first thought."
"You thought?"
"Demon's minds can traverse the path to nothingness quite easily. Human minds are another story. There must be either an innate ability or a lifetime of training to do that, neither of which I believe Lina to have. However, there may have been one voice she did hear in those two moments she was engulfed."
Though still confused, Amelia immediately grasped the implications. "Mister Zelgadis?"
"Zel? But how...?" Gourry slowly lowered the point of his sword, finally accepting some of what was said as true. "He doesn't even practice a lot of black magic, mainly shaman. How could he...?"
Xelloss leapt down from the branch and began walking towards the flickering light in the distance. "One, I believe Zel may have had a innate ability all along. This ability might have been accidentally enhanced by his curse. Chimeras with a human part are quite rare. I think Zelgadis may be the only living one to date. His other parts are golem, which gives him an earth tie, and demon, which might have enabled his human mind to also travel into the realm of L-sama. Of course, he himself is probably not aware of it. However, from Lina's standpoint, he was probably her only anchor."
"But Mister Xelloss, it doesn't make sense. The second time Miss Lina cast the Giga Slave, we were all d-d-d..." Amelia trembled; even after all this time she was still nervous and frightened at the idea of having once been dead.
"Zelgadis' human side was killed, yes. And being as his way of thinking is more human than anything, it would have appeared that he was completely dead. But again, I believe his demon side may have played a part in that, instinctively taking Zel's essence and storing it until it could return safely. That second time may have had a bigger imprint on Lina's psyche than the first, where he was simply nearby at the time."
I don't' understand half of what he's saying, but I understand enough. Still... "If what you're saying is true, then how come it wasn't Zel who brought Lina back the second time? Seems like he'd have been able to do that, not me."
"Different situation, and probably because a part of Zel was in fact trying to keep Lina there."
"WHAT?" "No way!" "Mister Zelgadis would never..." "You must be crazy if you think."
"Not intentionally!" Xelloss raised his voice in an uncharacteristic show of impatience, shutting them both up. "None of what Zel can do in regards to his demon nature is conscious. He has no control over it. It's purely instinct. I don't even think the part of him that was still in oblivion was really trying to 'keep' Lina, only that she had made such a connection with him that she herself didn't want to leave. Lina's mind could not handle the stress of complete darkness. It was only a matter of time before madness set in. Unfortunately, her focus is once again Zel."
"Zel..." Is this what he meant? Did Lina hurt Zel? Did he even know it was her?
A loud, screeching cry is heard from where the light is. Gourry and Amelia watch in horror as the light winks out. Moments later, they can see Lina and an unconscious Zel taking off within a Raywing.
"L-sama..."
"Where is she taking Mister Zelgadis?"
"My guess, where this connect took root. Back to the remains of Phibrizzo's domain. We can beat her there since she doesn't know how to master walking through darkspace with someone else, but what happens when we get there is another story..."
"We don't have a choice. Take us there, now!"
Xelloss nodded, grasping Gourry's arm. "Hold onto Amelia, and do not let go. I'm not responsible if you end up spending eternity in darkspace." With that, Xelloss phased all three of them away, racing towards Phibrizzo's lair.
Lina smiled a mindless little smile, kneeling down inside the bubble to stroke Zel's hair.
"I knew it the first time, you were meant for me. We'll bring oblivion to us, and then we can truly be together, as we're suppose to be."
Xelloss, Gourry, and Amelia all phased in outside the ruins of Phibrizzo's domain. Both Gourry and Amelia gasped upon seeing it nearly rebuilt. Gourry turned to the trickster to confirm what he was thinking. "Lina?"
"Yes. She's been rebuilding the further she slips into her madness. Judging from how much is complete, I'd have to say she's almost gone."
"Wh-what happens if she...?" Amelia didn't bother to finish, letting the question hang open in the night air.
"Then there is no hope of saving her from herself." At this, Xelloss looks at Gourry, his eyes reflecting the moon in shades of violet. "Can you do it, Gourry?"
"What?" Gourry knew what Xelloss meant, but was hoping he didn't have to face it. Of all thins he imagined doing in his life, this was not one of them.
"Can you do it? Can you kill Lina Inverse? Not do you have the ability, but do you have the capacity to kill her if she succumbs to her growing insanity?"
"Mister Xelloss! You don't mean we... we'd have to... against Muh- Miss Lina?!" The young girl looked absolutely stricken at the thought of facing her former friend and traveling companion. "But we can't! It wouldn't be..."
"Just? Allow me to remind you that Lina still has the power not only a the Dragu Slave, but can still effectively wipe out the entire world with one Giga Slave. How safe would any of us be if she possesses that kind of power in the state she's fallen into? Where's the justice in that, Amelia?"
Amelia sobered, not use to having her own words thrown back at her. She turned away, not sure if she herself were able to face Lina if that's what it came down to. Slowly, she brought her eyes up to Gourry, her voice a shaky timbre that barely carries. "What about you... Mister Gourry?"
Gourry clenched his teeth, his knuckles white from the tight grasp on the hilt of the Hikari no Ken. He stares at the restored ruins, his mind somewhere from the present.
alone... and pain... something...
He didn't rape me or anything, if that's what you mean.
something was going on every time he left.
something was trying to hurt me, and I didn't know what...
Don't... don't tell her why I'm here.
Every clue was there, but he didn't see it, didn't want to see it. Even then, it would have been easy if it had been Xelloss. All he had to do was think about the limp Zel probably thought he hid and hating Xelloss would have been the easiest thing in the world...
But it wasn't Xelloss. It wasn't him at all. The last person Gourry would have ever though capable of hurting someone like that not only did, but hurt the person Gourry cared about more than perhaps any other in this world. Perhaps she could excuse her on the fact she was insane, but the picture of Zelgadis sobbing to himself burned hot and hateful in Gourry's mind. She made him cry. She did it. Lina.
Gourry turned to the Mazoku, want to scream at him for not listening to Zel before. But his anger towards the trickster left as suddenly as it came.
Did he try and deny it too? Did he pretend it wasn't what it looked like because that meant admitting that Lina was insane? That she was hurting... abusing Zel? Isn't that what I did? How can I get mad, I'm as much to blame as he is.
Gourry sighed, his hand still in a death grip on his sword. He chokes back the tears before finally answering the only way he could.
"If I have to, I'll kill Lina."
Lina decided to take the scenic route. Why not? She had Zel, their 'home' was nearly complete, and soon they could share oblivion together.
Wonder if I can get rid of that stupid Lord of Nightmares. Now that would be nice, me and Zel in the sea of chaos...
She giggled, running her fingers again through the lavender hair. Zel groaned, stirring a little, much to Lina's insane delight.
"Wake up, usagi. You don't want to sleep forever, do you?"
Zel shifted, reaching up to rub his eyes before looking at Lina. With a shriek, he backs himself as far away from the sorceress as possible. "L-Lina...! You...? But why? Why did... oh kami... no..."
"Hmm? Oh, you still thinking about that? Now Zel, what else was I suppose to do, hmm? I mean, really, running off with Xelloss like that. I just had to let you know I was unhappy with your behavior..."
"Un... unhappy?! Lina... you... What are you talking about?!"
"Oh, you mean you don't know?"
"NO!!"
"It's simple, silly." Lina giggles again, the sound only setting of Zel's already frayed nerves even more. "I heard you."
"H-heard me??"
"Yes! Heard you! When I was all alone in that dark place, I heard your voice. The first time I went there, I didn't hear anyone. I never went back until that day we fought Ruby-eye. Then I wasn't alone. The next time, I heard you again, even closer than before. That's when I knew, you were the one meant for me. We're suppose to be together, don't you see, Zel? You and I, and oblivion."
Zel shakes his head frantically, trying to argue what can only be lunacy on Lina's part. But a harsh, racking cough catches him unawares. He folds up on his side, praying for something... anything... but what he was going through right now. Slowly, he feels himself slipping back into unconsciousness, and for once goes willingly. Maybe it would all be a nightmare...
Lina's words linger just before he blacks out, as if to haunt him even in the abyss.
"Don't worry, you won't ever have to be sick again..."
Xelloss walked over the ruins, placing a hand against one of the walls. "No spells. I guess she wasn't expecting anyone to remember or want to return here."
"I know I wasn't planning on coming back." Gourry wandered to the side, looking for a way in. "Why come back to the place you died at anyway? Even if you came back?"
The princess winced, still shaken at the very thought of what happened here so long ago. Amelia quickly changed the subject to more immediate matters. "I still can't believe that Miss Lina would want to hurt Mister Zelgadis. If what you said is true, then shouldn't she be... um... well, I just don't understand..."
Xelloss shook his head. "Because you're thinking with a rational mind, which Lina is not in possession of at the moment. Who can say what her motives are for anything."
"Mister Xelloss, why can't you just stop top Miss Lina?"
"Orders..."
Gourry snorted as he continued searching. Yeah, always so busy doing what whatshername told you that you couldn't even see when Lina was hurting Zel. You don't deserve him...
"Not what you're thinking, Gou-kun."
"GAH!" The blond fell back on his bums as Xelloss appeared right in front of him. "Would you cut that out!"
Xelloss merely shrugged. "Amelia's checking the other side. I wanted a minute without having to answer a million questions from her. Nice girl but doesn't get it when it comes to alternative lifestyles."
Gourry stood up, brushing himself off as he glared at the trickster priest. "What do you want?"
"Just to tell you that I did know, but I was unable to do anything directly to Lina. Believe me, I tried. But she's protected, Mother says..."
"Yeah, probably by "Mother" herself." The sarcasm laced the word so heavily Xelloss didn't have to bother to feed from it, it stuffed him.
"No, not by Mother. She would have let me go ahead just to see the how I'd have gone about it. She gets bored easily, you know. Needs something to amuse her. No, that's not who's protecting her."
"Then who?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Xelloss walked over to a particularly cracked looking section of the wall. "If Lina can bring oblivion to the world, that leaves a clear path for Shabranigdo to return, as well as any Dark Lord from any plane, in truth. A hole to be filled by darkness. It would unravel the fabric. I'm not sure what L-sama herself would do then. Perhaps simply toss it and start anew? Forget it and go on vacation?" Tapping his staff against the wall, Xelloss watched impassively as it crumbled to dust.
"Shabra... Okay, that kinda makes sense. But if that's the case, then why are you helping now? Can't believe your boss said it was okay." Gourry ducked his head inside, and came back out. "And we should get Amelia."
"In good time. As for what Mother said, she only said I was not to directly attack Lina Inverse. Of course that leaves a lot open to interpretation." Xelloss stepped inside, his voice calling back. "Unfortunately, the cloak I placed on him when I was finally able to give him the opportunity to run didn't last."
What? Gourry frowned, not sure what to make of the Mazoku's words. What is he... What game are you playing now, Xelloss? Damn it. He jogged around to where Amelia was, calling out to the Seyruun princess. "Amelia! We got a way in. c'mon!"
"Wha...? Oh, coming, Mister Gourry." Gourry waited a few moments to let her catch up, then the two both ducked inside. Pitch black seemed to swallow them whole. Both went silent, sure the only sound to be heard was they're suddenly triple beating hearts. This silent, suffocating darkness was hardly normal, and they all knew it. Amelia lifted her hand to try and push some of it back."
"Lighting."
A second after Amelia cast the spell, Gourry wished she hadn't. The two could only gape as everywhere they looked pictures, paintings, and other assorted items somehow relating to Zelgadis lined the walls from floor to ceiling. Some of the objects were even a few of Zel's personal belongings that had wound up missing during their travels. Amelia walked over to a pair of worn gloves, picking them up with near trembling fingers.
"He... he looked everywhere for these. We all looked, remember? We couldn't find them. Did Lina have them and just... just..."
Confused, Gourry also began looking at various things Zel had "misplaced" over the journeys. "If that's true, then Lina must have been losing it for a while."
"Indeed, probably ever since she first cast the Giga Slave near Zelgadis, only it grew that much worse the second time." The trickster fingered a small pouch. "This is what made me suspicious."
"His money pouch. But why was that so important, Mister Xelloss?"
"It was the first sign of Lina doing something completely unlike herself. Remember how we learned of it's disappearance?"
Gourry rubbed his chin, trying to remember. "I shared a tent with him. I remember at one point I got really sleepy out of the blue. I didn't think about it because it was Lina's watch. When we woke up, Zel was upset because all his money was just scattered on the side of him but his pouch was gone. We just though a animal came in while we were sleep."
Amelia whipped her head around as she put the pieces together. "Mister Xelloss, if Miss Lina was on watch, did she put a sleeping spell on them and take Mister Zelgadis' pouch? But it doesn't make sense, why would she leave the money?"
Because she was that far gone? Lina... We trusted you. How could you do this?
"Like I said, Lina was losing her sanity ever since your ill-fated meeting with Hellmaster. None of what she did in regards to Zelgadis made any sense."
The swordsman sighed, his eyes absently traveling about the room before coming to a stop. He could feel his face doing a slow burn at the picture in front of him. Was she spying on him too?!
"I wonder where Miss Lina got all these paintings from? Mister Zelgadis would never have posed for anything like that."
"Probably described from either memory or imagination. Perhaps even both."
Definitely both. Gourry could only stare as he looked up at a detailed and accurate portrait of Zel during a soak in the baths. Gourry remembered it clearly; he had enjoyed that bath a little too much himself and blamed it on the company. The only difference between then and the painting was the water. Gourry couldn't see underneath it and didn't want to for fear of the blush he was doing now. In the painting, the water was crystal clear.
How did she know he was... I mean... When did she get a look at him anyway! Took me forever!
"We'd better prepare. Lina will be here soon."
Wonder if I can get that picture when this is all over with. Gourry joined the others as they began to work out a plan.
You... You hurt me. It was you all that time... Why, Lina? Why?
Zel was once again curled on his side, his body still weak as it fought against his illness. Occasional coughs would jar his slender frame, but he didn't have the energy to do more than lay there. He couldn't move away from Lina, who held his head in her lap as she stroked the lavender hair on his head.
"Funny, for your hair to be wire, it's kinda soft in a way. I like it, but I want you to grow it, okay?"
Zel didn't respond, letting Lina's injured mind to take that as agreement on his part.
"I have it all planned, usagi. [1] I've been thinking about it ever since I used the Giga Slave the last time and almost lost it. But it's so simple now. I'll bring oblivion here and use that as a path to the Sea of Chaos. We can let the rest of them fight it out for the world while you and I have eternity together, just the two of us. It was always so peaceful when I was with you in there. I want that peace again..."
Reddish-brown eyes falter a little before replaced with the light of insanity once more.
"I don't know if I want Xelloss there, but maybe after we get use to it, I can bring Gourry and Amelia there too. It will be just like old times..."
Lina finally made her way to the ruins, her prize near unconscious now. That was fine, he seemed more cooperative that way. She guided the Raywing bubble inside the ruin, settling them both towards a dark corner in the back before popping the spell. Zel fell in a heap, sparking another weak coughing fit.
"Oh, sorry, usagi!" Lina kneels down, pulling the weakened Zel into her arms. "So so sorry! I forgot all about that. But it will be okay. Once I'm through, we'll both be fine. No more pain for either of us."
The diminutive girl tossed a lighting ball at her destination. A lavish bedroom scene comes into view as she starts dragging Zel that way.
"Just think, no more curse. No more people trying to get us. No more getting mixed up in some life-or-death struggle to save the world. Just you, me, and peace. It's to die for, Zel, you'll see..."
"Miss Lina, stop!"
Lina was halfway there when Amelia's cry brought her up short. She frowned, looking around in the darkness. "You'll have to come back later, Amelia. I can only take Zel with me this time. I'll come back for you and Gourry later."
Amelia tossed up her own lighting spell as she approached the irritated sorceress. "Miss Lina, I know you're still somewhere in there. You don't really want to do this, do you? Think of all we been through together..."
"That's exactly why I'm doing this! I'm tired of going through the same thing day in and day out! I thought maybe if we spilt up it would be different... BUT IT NEVER ENDS! Flare Arrow!" Lina ended her tirade with a vicious and unprepared for attack. Amelia barely had a chance to duck out the way, dropping hard to the floor.
"Miss Lina...!"
"BRAM GUSH!"
Amelia saw the wind spell coming directly at her and silently braced herself. Don't think I'll be coming back this time, daddy... Sending up a prayer, she waited.
And waited... and waited...
Cracking an eye open, Amelia saw not the great beyond as she was expecting, but the dark cape of the Trickster Priest instead. A cloak made of the finest silks wouldn't have looked as beautiful as that one did just then.
"Xelloss..."
Lina practically spat the name out like a foul poison. Xelloss only looked calmly at Lina, having dispersed the Bram Gush.
"Lina, regardless of what you may think of me..."
"Shut up! Just shut the hell up! You took him from me! YOU! But he's with me now! You can't have him, do you hear me!! Dynast Breath!" Lina sent the demon ice spell hurling at Xelloss. Still, the Mazoku was faster, phasing both him and Amelia out of the way. "You are not taking him from me again!"
"Lina, stop this!"
The redhead turned around, staring madly as Gourry stepped out directly between her and the bed. "Don't make me hurt you Gourry. You above all people should want to see Xelloss dead. He took Zel away from both of us! I would have let you come with us. I know you feel the same way... I know it..."
Gourry winced, wondering just how much did Lina really know. One look at Zelgadis forced the thought to the back as he took a step closer.
"Xelloss didn't take him, Zel went willingly. This, what you're doing... That's taking him. He trusted you, Lina..."
"Which is why I'm doing this!! Don't you understand?! This is all for him too..."
"You say you don't want to see Zel hurt anymore?"
At this, Lina nods enthusiastically. "That's right! No more pain. You can see that, can't you, Gourry?"
"Then why did you hurt him when he was with Xelloss?"
Lina faltered for a moment, but recovers quickly. "No... no, I had to. I had to show him it was wrong..."
"By doing the very thing you're trying to save him from?"
The sorceress stumbled back a bit, the logic hitting her even through her fogged reasoning. Unfortunately, whether sane or no, Lina's always had one philosophy to fall back on; when in doubt, destroy it.
"I don't want to hurt you, Gourry..."
"Then don't." Gourry takes another step, the Hikari no Ken in his hand as his eyes stay focused on Lina. "Stop this now, and maybe we can go back to the way things where. Or not even that, but just settle down and live peaceful lives. After all this time, don't you want that?"
Amelia watched silently as the two former alleys now faced each in near fighting stances. She could see the nervous determination in Gourry's eyes, while in Lina's...
That's not Lina, not the Lina you knew. Maybe if you keep thinking that this won't be as hard as it will when it's all over...
A hand taps her shoulder, causing the princess to bite back a shriek as she turns to the owner of it. "Wha...?"
"Shh..." Xelloss placed a finger to her lips. "I think I know of one way where we'll all get out of this alive. Keep her busy." The Mazoku disappeared before Amelia could even protest.
Keep her busy?? How in the world do I do that?! Her nerves run high as Amelia turned back to the two people standing in the center. Her mentor and old crush was lying completely still on the ground now. The only thing keeping the young girl from thinking she'd lost yet another close person was the shallow rise and fall of his chest. He needs help. Please, whatever you're going to do, do it soon, Mister Xelloss.
"Dust Chip!"
Gourry barely has time to knock most of the frozen mini arrow heads away from him. A few make it past his sword, leaving light cuts and scratching on his arms where the skin is bare. "Lina, I know you're in there. Just listen..."
"No, you're just trying to confuse me the way you are. Once I do this, we'll all be better off. Bomb Di Wind!" She sent a strong blast of air at Gourry, who jumps to the side to avoid it. "Bust Rond!" The second spell scores a direct hit, charring the blond slightly. He coughs, getting back to his feet.
So far they've all been weak spells. She's holding back... why? "Lina..."
"You're fighting me now, but you'll thank me when it's all over, Gourry. If you'd just accept it..."
The swordsman finally stands firm, his blade held in front of him. "I can't accept it, Lina. This is the very thing you and I use to fight against before, remember?"
"No it isn't..."
"Yes it is! Shabranigdo wanted to world for himself. Hellmaster wanted to destroy it. Why is this so different? It isn't! I'm sorry, Lina, but somewhere inside you know I'm right. I couldn't live with myself if I let you do this..."
Tears slip over Lina's cheeks as she gazes at her friend. For a moment, Gourry can see the true Lina in them, screaming to be free. But it's gone that quickly as Lina raised her hand.
"I've been told a direct hit doesn't give you any time to feel pain. Zel and I will see you soon, Gourry...
...Dragu Slave"
The attack is so fast and vicious that Gourry knows there's nothing to do about it. I'm sorry, Zel. He doesn't close his eyes, wanting to see his death as he felt only right.
He feels a slight tug, then nothing. Gourry gasps, wondering if this is how death is suppose to be. When the darkness fades, Gourry looks into a face that's familiar, even though the eyes are obscured by a thick fall of bangs.
"Funny, L-sama looks like Lina... except for the bigger chest..."
Only when the woman chuckles does Gourry realize he spoke out loud. "Oops... uh... Are you...?"
"Hardly. Gourry, right? Maybe later we can talk. Gotta wait, though. Need to take care of something." The woman stepped away from Gourry, who's beginning to see he isn't dead at all. He finally spots Amelia kneeling next to Zel and goes over to them.
"What just happened?"
Amelia shook her head, her hands glowing as she begins healing Zelgadis. "I'm not sure. One minute I saw Miss Lina using the Dragu Slave, the next I see you and that woman standing over there. Miss Lina just... stopped."
"Stopped?"
The princess nodded. "Mister Xelloss then came back and said it was safe to go to Mister Zelgadis, so I started trying to help him. But I don't think I can do it here. He needs a real doctor, Mister Gourry, fast."
"Hopefully we can get him one. Once we find out what's going on." The blond looked over to where the woman was standing in front of Lina. The madness is replaced by an overwhelming fear that caused her knees to buckle. The petite sorceress turned stricken eyes up to the figure now standing over her.
"Onee... sama..."
Gourry stared. Amelia gaped. The woman was as far removed from Lina in looks as anyone could be. Yet they couldn't deny what they just heard.
"Si... sister? that's Miss Lina's sister??"
"Quite. Luna Inverse, knight of Ceiphied, elder Inverse sibling."
Gourry glanced at Xelloss, still trying to comprehend it all. "You knew?"
"Yes, and I know Luna is probably the only thing that no matter what her state of mind, Lina still fears."
"Fears?"
"Long story."
Gourry just turned to stare at the two again, not sure what to do about any of it. A slight cough from the figure below finally got a response from him. He looked at Amelia, shock giving way to concern and fear. "How is he?"
Amelia looked down, glad to think of something she could understand. "I'm trying to use a healing spell, but it's not working. I don't think this is an ordinary cold, Mister Gourry."
"Then what is it?"
"May I?" Without waiting for an answer, Xelloss walked over to them and knelt down, placing a hand over Zel's eyes. The trickster priest lost himself for a moment before pulling his hand away with a frown.
"A spell woven into his system. Lina probably started it a while ago."
"Is there anyway to reverse it?" Amelia's voice trembled. The princess was near tears at the entire situation. Lina going crazy, making Zel sick, kidnapping, her sister... I don't know how much more I can take...
"Yes, but only by the person who originally cast the spell."
Swallowing, Gourry turned his eyes over to the sorceress in question. So far neither woman had spoken or moved. Gourry prayed Luna would get through to Lina before Zel took a turn for the worse. He slipped a hand into Zel's, his breath catching when he felt the barest of squeezes from the limp fingers.
Hang on, Zel, please. Don't want to lose you again...
Across the room, Luna stared down at her sister. Part of her wanted to just pull her close and take her home right then and there. Another part wanted to slap the hell out of and tell her to grow up. But she wasn't Ceiphied's knight for making hasty decisions based on emotions. She took stock of the situation. One unstable sorceress with the power to destroy the world. One swordsman who could possibly kill her if Luna herself doesn't stop him. One sick shaman who's pretty much at the center of it all. Luna sighed. One thing was sure, if he died, it would all go to hell. Time to see what she could do before things went there.
"Lina. Look at me, imouto."
Lina's eyes lifted, looking at her sister with a blank, almost dead expression. Luna knelt down, grasping Lina's chin to force the younger Inverse to meet her eyes.
"Let's get one thing straight. I'm not going to kill you."
This seem to set Lina off into a stream of terrified babble. All Luna could make out were "sorry" "trying to help" "never meant it" and something about wanting to be helpful.
"Lina... Lina... LINA!"
Instant silence. "Y-yes, Oneesama?"
"I don't want to talk about that right now. I want to know if you put anything in your friend over there, the one lying down."
Trembling, Lina only spared a glance at Zel. Her shivering increased as she tried to look anywhere but at Luna. "I... I didn't mean... I was just... I mean..."
Luna wasn't having any of it. She gave Lina a quick jerk, forcing their eyes to lock. "Do you want him to be sick, imouto?"
"N-no...! He wasn't... we were going to..."
"You honestly think that casting the Giga Slave wouldn't hurt him?"
At this, Lina wails, jerking herself away from Luna's hold. "It wouldn't! He was there! I know it wouldn't hurt him!" Lina began to walk towards Zel. Gourry flinched, his hand already going to the hilt of his sword, but Luna caught the young Inverse in a steel grip.
"You don't think he'd be hurt by you taking away everything he cares about?"
"He cares about me! There's nothing else!"
I'm getting tired of this. Luna dragged Lina over to Zel and Gourry, setting her down hard enough to make the redhead yelp. "Look, Lina. You say you don't want to hurt him, right? Take a good look, then and tell me he's not hurting."
The brat in Lina wanted to refuse. She knew what she was talking about. But the fear of her sister won out, as always. She huffed, then looked down at Zel, absently reaching out to brush his bangs away from his eye. Gourry wanted to smack her away, to throttle her for what she's down, but a hand on his shoulder made him hesitate. He looked up to see Luna shake her head. He didn't like it, but she seemed to know what she was doing. More importantly, she alone seemed to be able to control Lina. So he waited... and watched.
She looks at him wrong and I swear I'll...
The thought was cut off as his throat unconsciously tightened. A part of Gourry really didn't want to hurt Lina. They'd been through so much together. And if he had never met her, he had never met Zel either. But he didn't want her to hurt Zel anymore.
Gods...
Lina smiled, her mind caving in a bit to her madness again. This will prove I'm right. "Zel?"
Though sick, weak, and near unconscious, Zel was lucid enough for her voice to register. He squirmed, trying to get closer to Gourry and as far away from that voice as he possibly could. All the shaman could associate that voice with now was pain. And he was tired of pain. He really didn't want to hurt anymore...
Luna let go of Gourry, sitting down next to the stunned Lina. She didn't say anything, just watching her sister's expression carefully. Time to wake up, kid.
The redhead stilled, her mind trying to cope with something it didn't want to acknowledge. No, it's a trick, it has to be. Even as her madness made another strike against her, Lina couldn't deny what her own eyes were telling her. She watched Zel now. Watched a person she considered a friend first and foremost, a person she grew to respect, admire, and perhaps in her own way love, try and get away from her in fear. She expected this of everyone else, but never from her friends...
Never from Zel.
"Why? What did I do? Why do they always want to leave me?"
Frowning, Luna turned her sibling around to face her. "What?"
The younger Inverse was silent, her bangs shadowing her eyes. Luna wanted to shake it out of her, but she didn't dare. Something was going on in the girl's head, and she didn't want to risk it, no matter what it was. Finally, Lina lifted her eyes, no trace of her insanity left as tears traced down her face.
"Why did they leave of, Luna?"
Luna sighed. Of all things, she forgotten about that. But it made sense. Lina had ran away before they ever had a chance to talk about their parents death. She probably never let go of it in her heart.
One of the most powerful sorceresses in the world, yet you couldn't stop your parents from dying. Yeah, I know how that feels, sis.
"I don't know. But I do know there wasn't anything either one of us could do about it..."
"He's always been so sad, Lu." Lina whimpered, falling back to old childhood endearments. Luna just let her talk, though inside she took it as a good sign. "Always thinking he was ugly. He's not, though. I... He helped me. I wanted... wanted to help... maybe then... I could... wouldn't feel so bad..."
She thought if she could help Zel, she could deal with mom and dad dying? Luna, you should have seen this coming. Well, let's see if we can fix it, at least.
"You can still help him, Lina."
Lina only shook her head, scooting back as she hugged her knees to her chest. "Scared of me now. He'll never wanna be my friend again..."
Unable to keep silent anymore, Gourry took Lina by the shoulders, his voice tight with nerves. "That's not true, Lina! Remember when you tossed him over as an anchor? he forgave you. What about that stupid bunny suit or the game? Still he stayed. I know if we just tell him, he'll forgive you again. It wasn't your fault, really..."
So absorbed in her imagined loss of Zel, Lina had completely forgotten about anyone else. She risked a glance into Gourry's eyes, feeling equal parts shame, embarrassment, and foolishness. "G-Gourry... can you? I... I mean... you think you could... that is..."
Gourry knew what she was getting at, and wished Lina hadn't asked. If he were honest with himself, a part of him could hate her for what she'd done. But it wasn't really her fault. She didn't ask to learn a spell that would drive her crazy. She didn't even know.
Gourry hated what she did. He still like Lina.
"Yeah, I can."
The swordsman breathed a little easier seeing a small smile on her lips. "Thanks."
"Mister Zelgadis?! No!"
Gourry was kneeling over Zel before he knew it. What he saw made his heart stop.
Zelgadis wasn't breathing.
"Oh gods, no... Zel... ZEL!"
Amelia tried casting healing spell after healing spell. None of them worked. She finally resorted to hitting his chest, something... anything. "Nononono! Mister Zelgadis!"
With a strangled sob, Gourry yanked the chimera into his arms, shaking him roughly as his tears blinded him.
"Damn you to hell, Greywers! Don't you do this to me again! Don't you dare tell me you love me and leave me again! I swear I'll never forgive you! Do you hear me?! Don't leave me, damn you!"
Nothing. Zel was nothing more than a doll in Gourry's arm. All the strength drained from the swordsman as he slid down, falling on Zel's chest as his shirt caught Gourry's grief in damp drops the quickly soaks the cloth through.
"Damn you... not again..."
How could he survive again without even the hope of seeing the chimera again? If Gourry thought the last separation hurt, it was nothing compared to the sheer deluge of pain washing over him now. No way he could live like this, no way...
The body underneath him felt warm. He didn't think of this until it began to glow as well. Looking up, Gourry found himself staring at a pair of hands lying over Zel's shoulder. He followed them to the wrists, traveling up the arms, his eyes tracing over the shoulder, up the neck, to set on the face of Lina Inverse. He choked back his cries, whispering roughly.
"Please... I need him..."
"I know."
Everyone gazed silently as Lina continued, her hands as bright as Zel himself was now. A strange darkness rose to the surface, disappearing into thin wisps of smoke. When the last particle left, the glow vanished. A moment later, the body of Zelgadis Greywers took a deep, coughing breath. He rolled too his side, fighting himself for a moment as he struggled to remember how to breath. Only when he appeared to be breathing normally did Gourry finally pull the shivering chimera into his arms.
"G-Gourry... I was... I..."
"Shh. Don't think about it. It'll be okay. Zel. Just rest."
Luna looked over at Lina. The mage glanced back nervously. Luna nodded her approval, then guided everyone away from Zel and Gourry, giving them some much needed privacy.
"Gourry... sorry... didn't want to... leave. Not this time..."
Gourry blink, not sure if Zel meant what he himself thought. "When I got your letter..."
"I mean... just now..."
"You heard me?"
"Yeah."
Sighing, Gourry only held Zel closer. "Forget it, it's over now. You don't have to worry about hurting anymore."
Zel shifted closer, giving into his urges for a change. "Wh-what about... about..."
"Trust me, it wasn't Lina. It was a... a Giga monster."
Zel lifted his eyes, giving Gourry a look. The blond just smiled, pressing his lips to Zel's hair. "Rest. I'll explain it all later."
Too weak to protest, Zel did just that, slipping in easily as Gourry held away the pain of his ordeal; giving Zel a peaceful dream to replace the end of his nightmare.
It would be... okay.
It's been nearly a month since the ordeal surrounding Zelgadis and Lina's Giga-induced madness. The sun rose on a bright and cheery morning, striking Zel in the eye. He only grumbled and pulled the pillow over his face.
"You'll never get use to that, will you?"
"You sound as if I should." Zel moved the pillow away, glancing over at his 'bedmate'. "I'm not a morning person..."
"At least not until you get your coffee, right?" Gourry threw off the cover and got up, doing a few stretches with an enthusiasm Zel found both welcome and sickening. "What do you want for breakfast?"
"Anything with caffeine."
"So coffee with a side of breakfast? Right." Gourry chuckles as he catches a pillow to the face. "Just kidding..."
Zel 'hmphs' good-naturedly and turns back over to go to sleep. His eyes fall on the window, where a white messenger bird sits on the sill. "Gourry, look." Zel sits up, cradling the bird as he removes the scroll. "Looks like it's from Amelia. Pretty long..."
"Wonder how she's doing." Gourry sits on the bed, taking the scroll from Zel as the shaman holds the bird in his hands. "Read it?"
"Please."
Nodding, Gourry begins reading the letter out loud. "Dear Mister Gourry and Mister Zelgadis. I hope you're both doing well. Mister Zelgadis should be getting a lot of rest after everything that's happened..." Gourry watched the chimera's eyes flicker. The wound was still too raw, but it was healing. "It's been a month and I think I'm finally getting use to the idea of you both as a couple. It was... weird for me. I guess everyone knew about my crush, huh? But it wasn't like what I see was between the two of you. Looking back, I'm surprised it took you both so long. But I guess you were still getting use to it as well."
"I've been visiting with Miss Luna. She's been very kind. She thinks Lina will recover completely. She just doesn't want her to cast the Giga Slave anymore. Miss Lina is still quiet. Miss Luna says she's not quite ready to talk about what happened, though she is beginning to speak. She hasn't said Mister Zelgadis' name yet. Even though it was the spell that made her crazy, she still feels guilty, I guess. Miss Luna says it will take time, like everything does."
"Mister Xelloss has been coming to Seyruun a lot lately. He's actually kind of nice to talk to. I know, he's a Mazoku, but he's been very polite. I think he feels bad about what happened too. I don't think it was his fault, though. He was ordered not to get involved. I think he was risking it doing what he did do. Do you think Mister Zelgadis can forgive him? I think that's what he needs..." Gourry glanced over to Zel, who sighed, nodding.
"She's right, and he did help me to escape the first time. I just didn't know it. And who knows what might have happened if I hadn't gone with him first..." Zel hangs his head, his bangs obscuring his eyes as he tries to stifle the swell of memories and pain. Gourry turned to wrap his arms protectively around the chimera, pressing gently lips to lavender hair.
"Don't. It's over now. Let it go, Zel."
"I try, it's just hard sometimes."
"I know." Gourry taps Zel on the nose before going back to the letter.
"Mister Xelloss and I have a lot in common, I think. I know we both liked Mister Zelgadis, even if it was just a crush. We both like going to plays, and we both like chocolate... a LOT. He already hinted that no matter what he has to obey his master, though. I wish he didn't have to. Maybe we can help him when Miss Lina feels better?"
"Some things will never change..."
Gourry looked up as Zel stared out the window. "What? Amelia still wanting justice for everyone, or just thinking everything will be okay in the end?"
"Perhaps both. But things will be eternally changed for Lina..." ...and me.
"Maybe Amelia just likes to hope. Nothing wrong with that. I did it, and it worked out, I think." He lets Zel think about it as Gourry finishes the letter.
"Maybe you both can come to Seyruun for awhile. I have a room set aside just for you. It would be nice to sit down and talk again. Mister Xelloss wants to drop by and visit you. He's waiting to see what you say. I think he's changing, just a little. Anyway, hope to hear from you soon. Mister Gourry, please take care of Mister Zelgadis, though I know you'll do that no matter what. Take care. Love, Amelia." Gourry paused, reading something silently. When it seem to stretch out, Zel grew curious and looked at the blond, surprised to see his normally easy-going features doing a slow blush. "Gourry?"
Without a sound, Gourry just hands Zel the letter. Zel frowns as he reads the bottom part. Soon he's a crimson as Gourry, folding the letter up rather quickly.
"Just being silly." "Yeah, that's Amelia..." "I mean, who would think..." "It's just a romantic folly..." "She's always been like that..." "It's not possible... is it?"
The last question caused Zel to pause. Is it really such an absurd idea? He looked over at Gourry, and knew from the tilt of his blond head that his lover was thinking the same thing.
"Ne, Zel..."
"Yeah?"
"Seyruun's nice this time of year, isn't it? I mean, it would be a nice spot if we were going to do that..."
"Yes, it would. And she did say it was a double bed. It would be easy to arrange..."
"We'd have to get a couple of things. Do you think...?"
"I don't see why not..."
"I just have one thing to say."
"What?"
"You even think of trying to put me in a wedding dress and we're through!"
Zel blinked. Soon the house echoed with the sounds of their laughter rising with the promise of new beginnings.