I'll meet you by
the wisdom tree
And I'll hold you so close
Come on out of the wilderness
Let love free you from your ghosts
Reality seemed to twist in on itself as Zelgadis entered Ceiphied's Temple. It was too much like his dream: The sense of peace overlaid with quiet dread, the shadows that clung to the columns despite the lit candles in their racks that lined the walls on either side, and the larger candles that dripped wax around the great statue of the Dragon God himself. Except there was no one here.
He heaved a sigh of relief at that and moved further into the temple, along the aisle that lead to the alter. Halfway there, his sharp ears picked up a muffled sob. The light of the candles around the alter illuminated a spill of red velvet on the steps --
Time screeched to a whining halt as everything inside Zelgadis seemed to seize up and die at that moment. Space shifted and suddenly he could see that broken figure lying on the steps much more clearly, and yet a remembered vision of a glass casket set upon the alter superimposed itself upon both his memory and vision. Shaking his head in mute denial, his mouth worked. "No," he managed to get out finally, a harsh rasp as he stood frozen to the spot. "It can't be -- "
He took a hesitant step forward. The figure shifted and he saw a spill of purple-black hair against the marble steps.
That galvanized him into action. "NO!" he shouted, launching himself forward. Not again! he added silently. He couldn't go through that again. Reaching the prone figure, he pulled her up into his arms and held her tightly against his chest. "No, this isn't real. You're alive, you're alive. You have to be alive," he repeated over and over as a litany while he rocked her. Back and forth, to and fro, his hands tangling in her hair and stroking her cheek and neck while his head was bent over hers and he bared his sharp teeth with the intensity of his emotions.
Slowly, something penetrated the dark haze that gripped him. His name. Someone was calling his name from nearby. It finally dawned on him that the girl he was holding was pushing against him.
"Zelgadis-san!" she said again as his arms went limp. She pushed herself up and sat back to look into his face. Shock ripped through him as he looked into her face, her lovely face, and those large blue eyes --
Quicker than a striking snake, his hands shot out and grabbed her face and tilted it up so he could see into those eyes. Eyes that while a little wild with surprise were alive and clear and bluer than the midnight sky.
"You're alive," he whispered, relief replacing the grief that had drained away. He smiled a halting smile as that knowledge forced itself into his brain. "You're alive!"
Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Yes, Zelgadis-san," she said quietly, not sure what to think.
"You're alive!" Grinning like a maniac, he pulled her face up and kissed her full on the mouth.
Amelia's eyes went wide in shock and for a moment they stared at each other over their joined lips. Something electric and new flashed like lightning through them both, jolting them apart. Confused and shaken, they stared into each other's eyes for a moment. Amelia felt her breath coming in short shallow gasps as she saw something in Zelgadis' eyes that was nothing like what she usually saw there. Then she had no more time to think as he grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up again, kissing her. This time, her eyes slid closed as his lips covered hers and his arms went around her to hold her tight. I told you he would come, a voice in her head whispered.
She felt so small and fragile in his arms, and yet she fit there so perfectly, he thought as he kissed her. Turning his head, he covered her lips with his and pushed his tongue against hers, forcing them open so he could run his tongue along the inside of her lip then into her mouth and against her own questing tongue. She did not resist him, but instead welcomed him. He felt her shift in his lap and her arms go around his neck. She noted in passing that his lips were firm, but like the rest of him, warm and pliable. He kissed her harder, deepening it in response to the sudden, dark urges he felt welling up inside him. He ran his fingers through her dark hair, gathering the silky locks and bunching them up at the nape of her neck.
Time stood still as he kissed her and she returned the kiss, giving as good as she got. When they finally parted, he was breathing heavily, as if he'd just very far and very fast. Her face was flushed, her eyes bright, and her lips already turning red and swollen from the attentions he'd been giving them. Smiling lazily and burying her fingers in his collar at the back of his neck, she said softly, "Welcome to Seyruun, Zelgadis-san."
He snorted and gave her a crooked grin. "Do you greet all your visitors like this?"
Arching an eyebrow, she regarded him as levelly as she could. "Who kissed whom, Zelgadis-san?"
"Oh, yeah," he said. "I take that as a no?"
"Considering you're the first, you may," she said. "It was certainly a wonderful way to say hello, however."
"Yes," he said with a nod. "Not bad." His expression suddenly turned serious and he looked upwards as if realizing where they were. "Uh, Amelia," he said. "Is there someplace where we can go and talk? Someplace where we won't be disturbed?"
She smiled and nodded. "We can go to my apartment. We won't be disturbed there." Nodding, he gathered her into his arms and stood, lifting her effortlessly. Glancing one last time up at the statue of the Dragon God, he turned and left the Temple.
Outside, there seemed to be some sort of disturbance on the grounds. Not wanting to meet up with anyone, Zelgadis cast a Ray Wing and lifted them over the Palace and to the doorway that led from the gardens to Amelia's bedroom per her directions. Landing lightly, he stepped through the open doors shrouded by white roses and into the moonlit bedroom. Setting the small girl on her feet, he looked down at her and smiled at her while touching her cheek and looking into her eyes. Those lovely, jewel-like eyes that drank in his soul and offered it back up to him again, eyes in which he wanted to drown.
"Come sit with me, Zelgadis-san," she said softly, taking his hand and tugging him towards a couch. He followed her but as he sank down next to her, it became apparent that it was inappropriate for him to be there, in the Princess' private apartment.
"I need to go, Amelia," he said softly, still holding her hand in his.
Her eyes clouded and her face fell. "So soon? You just got here! Will you be back?" The questions tumbled out over one another.
Shaking his head, he smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I didn't mean leave Seyruun. I meant -- here. Your bedroom. I shouldn't be here. But I'm not going anywhere." He stood to go.
Amelia scrambled up after him. "Zelgadis-san," she whispered. "Please stay with me."
The Chimera stopped and turned to look at her. Her eyes were large and pleading and her hand outstretched towards him.
"Amelia," he said, his voice becoming thick with emotion. "I c -- " He bit off that last word. He started again. "If I stay, I won't be able to -- I mean, I may -- I won't -- " He fell silent as his words became a nonsensical jumble. "I want to stay," he said finally.
She smiled up at him. "Then stay."
He shook his head. "Amelia, it would be inappropriate for me to stay here with you. You're a Princess, I'm a -- "
"Please don't call yourself a freak, Zelgadis-san," she said with steel in her voice. "You're not a freak. I've told you that before."
He shook his head as he grinned and laid a palm on her cheek. "I wasn't going to."
"Oh," she said, taken aback. "I'm sorry -- "
"Don't be. I deserved that. What I was going to say was you're a Princess. I'm -- I'm a commoner. How can I ask you do to something like this?" Why did she have to be a Princess? he wanted to scream. Why couldn't she just be a --
"I'm also a woman," she said in reply to his unspoken question. "And I'm standing in front of a man and asking him to spend the night with her."
Zelgadis felt as if his heart was going to break. "Amelia -- " he breathed. "Do you know what you're saying? What -- what will happen if I stay?"
She nodded and stepped closer to him. "I do. I want it, too."
"Amelia." Her name was a breathy whisper. "I -- I can't ask this of you. I'm not human!"
Her eyebrows angled downward. "I asked you not to do that, Zelgadis-san. You are human!"
He took a step closer to her and took her hand, opened her fingers and laid her palm upon his face, upon the glassy stones that decorated it. "This is what I meant, Amelia. I may appear human, but my body is -- it's different from other men's. I have skin that is the texture and consistency of stone. My hair is stiff like wire. My strength is frightening. I could hurt you!"
The girl's fingers curled around his cheek and caressed the stones there. "I'm willing to take the risk, Zelgadis-san," she said quietly.
Her touch sent electric shivers through him and there was nothing he wanted to do more than to catch her up in his arms and carry her to the bed and --
Grimacing, he closed his eyes and looked away from her. "Damn Rezo and his eyes," he grated harshly. "If it hadn't been for him?"
"If it hadn't been for Rezo," she interrupted firmly, "we would never have met."
Her words struck him to the very core. Looking back at her in shock, he let some of his anger spill over towards her. "Just how do you figure that?" he demanded, dropping her hand.
Undaunted, she smiled at him. "Tell me, Zelgadis-san, if Rezo hadn't done this to you, do you think you would have met Lina and Gourry? Where would you have been when your grandfather tried to resurrect Shabranigdu? Would we have met? Look at it this way: If it hadn't been for Rezo, all our lives would have been very different."
He stared at her, unable to say anything as her words echoed in his mind. "I -- I never thought of it that way before," he said slowly, reluctant to grant his grandfather even that much consideration on his part.
"No, I know you haven't," Amelia said softly but without rancor. "But it's true." She took his hand and pulled him back towards the couch and down next to her. "I wish I could have met him," she said softly. "Met the man who was your grandfather, not the monster he became. I owe him a great deal."
"They were the same man, Amelia," he said, dark anger in his voice. "And you owe him nothing."
She shook her head. "No, I can't believe that. Tell me, why do you hate him so much?"
"Why? Why do I hate him? Look at me, Amelia!" he nearly shouted. "Look what he did to me!" He thrust his hands out in front of him. Even as he stared at his hands, he knew that wasn't the true reason. "He -- Great Ceiphied, Amelia," he gasped, his voice breaking. "I loved him and this is what he did to me?" He stared at his hands, the clenched and clawed fingers, as the truth struck home. "I loved him, Amelia," he repeated softly. "Why did he have to go away? Why did he have to be the one that Shabranigdu took?" His voice broke and he put his face in his hands and his shoulders shook as dry, rasping sobs racked his body.
Amelia took him by the arm and led him back to the sofa where he sank upon it. She sat on her knees next to him and put her arms around him, holding him tightly as his grief threatened to overwhelm him. He turned to put his arms around her waist, burying his face against her breast while she cradled his head like a mother would her child. It was disturbing to see Zelgadis displaying such strong emotion, yet it cheered her somewhat that he trusted her enough to let her see him like this, and to even accept the comfort she offered. She wondered if he'd ever been able or desired to mourn his grandfather before this; probably not. Perhaps now he'd be able to get on with his life, she mused as she rocked him and stroked his hair just as he had done to her a few minutes earlier. The Princess leaned her cheek against his hair, careful to avoid the prickly ends, and crooned softly to him as she comforted him as best she could.
Eventually, the Chimera grew quiet in her arms and Amelia became slowly aware of the weight of his cheek pressing against the expanse of skin exposed by the low-cut neckline of her gown. Memories came back to her of the feelings stirred by Coyote holding her, her vision of Zelgadis in the desert, and finally Zelgadis grabbing her up and kissing her in the Temple. Memories that made her flush. She closed her eyes and heaved a heavy sigh, not realizing exactly what that would do to the parts of her body directly under his cheek. Afterwards, when she did realize what she'd done, she froze and blushed.
Zelgadis stirred and pushed himself up, turning his head and staring at the soft flesh that had pillowed his cheek. Tearing his eyes away from her décolletage to meet her own, he stared into them. They remained like that a moment in a frozen tableau: Zelgadis with one hand braced on the cushion next to Amelia and the other on the back of the couch, gazing hungrily into her eyes, and Amelia on her knees and blushing hotly. Their faces were close together, so it took just the barest shift in his position to bring his face even closer. Turning his head slightly, he touched his lips to hers; it was the barest whisper of a touch, but it was enough to send waves of electricity through him. He felt Amelia's breath catch in her throat and he pulled back a little. Without taking his eyes from hers, he lifted his hand from the cushion next to her, he laid it gently, lightly upon her chest.
She gasped at his touch which served to press her flesh into closer contact with his hand. Leaning forward again, Zelgadis caught her lips with his, pulling at them, tugging, with each tug becoming harder and more passionate. He pushed against her, forcing his tongue into her mouth, to explore the warm recesses inside. She was like warm, sweet wine: Intoxicating and soothing at the same time. He could lose himself in her and found himself wanting to do so. Pushing forward, he forced her onto her back, kneeling over her as she straightened her legs as best she could while they were caught in the full skirts of her costume. He felt her hands on his arms, grasping his shoulders as he deepened their kiss. As if by its own accord, his hand on her chest moved downward and around to cup her breast, finding its shape and conforming itself to her. Her gasp was his reward as he squeezed gently.
He left off kissing her lips and moved lower, finding her jawline and trailing his tongue along it to her chin and under it. Zelgadis felt awkward, having no experience with what she might find pleasurable, but did what she seemed to like. And if her quickened breathing and soft cries were any guide, she was enjoying this very much.
Kissing her neck, he worked downwards, adding his teeth to scrape very lightly along her skin and alternating his kisses with light nips. She succeeded in freeing one leg and he felt it go around his waist as she attempted to pull him down. "Zelgadis-san," she breathed, head flung back and neck arched delicately under him. In the moonlight, he could see her pulse there, and not so much hear her heartbeat as feel it pounding wildly against her ribcage. Growing bolder, he moved further downward, onto that expanse of soft flesh. Oh, how he wanted to rip her clothes off and expose more of her. He wanted to see and explore every inch of her body with his hands and fingers and tongue and lips --
All the while, a voice was screaming at him to reconsider what he was doing: She was the Crown Princess of Seyruun, for Ceiphied's sake! How could he even consider laying his hands upon her, let alone think to lie with her? And yet, he wanted her and the Dragon God willing, he would have her.
With a jolt, he pulled back and looked down at her. She opened her eyes and looked up at him, confusion furrowing her brow. "Zelgadis-san?" she asked, reaching up and touching her fingers to her cheek. When she drew them away, they were wet. She turned them so that he could see the tears on them. Leaning down, he kissed her fingers, tasting the salt on her skin.
His desire went beyond mere want. Wanting was all very good; at least in wanting her, he was not chasing something he could never have. She was one of the fine things he'd been given, he knew that now. And all he'd ever had to do was to reach out and take her.
But it was more than that. Simple want was not enough. He needed her to find his humanity again.
He needed her so that he could learn to love again.
He needed her.
Still staring down at her, he shifted and leaned against the back of the sofa so he could raise his hand to cup her cheek. "Amelia," he whispered in a broken voice. "I -- "
"Zelgadis-san," she said softly. "Please. I want this."
Shaking his head, he leaned down and touched his lips to hers. "That's not what was going to say," he whispered. "You couldn't stop me now if you wanted. What I wanted to say was -- " But he just couldn't get the words out; what he was feeling was too big for words. Instead, he shook his head and hauled himself up, then dragged her into his arms. Carrying her light weight across the room to the bed, he laid her upon it. She scooted backwards to make room for him as he climbed onto the tall bed to kneel over her.
He wanted to tell her. He wanted to tell her how much she meant to him, how much he wanted her, how much he needed her. He kept thinking it over and over in his head, but couldn't seem to get the words out. His throat seized up every time he tried to say them. I love you, Amelia. Four simple words, that's all. Why couldn't he say them? He leaned down and put his mouth close to her ear and tried again, but managed only to mouth them breathlessly while his lips moved against her smooth, milk-white skin.
Squeezing his eyes closed in frustration, he sought out her mouth and kissed her with bruising force. She deserved to be told; he knew she wanted to be told! He wanted to tell her! So why couldn't he say them?
Lowering himself, he put his arms around her and held her close as he kissed her. She conformed herself to his body, pressing against him suggestively and putting her own arms around his chest. His hands moved between the two of them and pulled at the laces of her bodice, jerking them lose and pulling the fabric aside. When it was lose enough, he pushed the sleeve off her shoulder and tugged it off her arm. Releasing her lips, he bent his head and kissed her neck where her shoulder joined it. Her skin was soft and hot under his lips, tasting a bit like salt from the light sheen of sweat there. He rolled back and worked at the other sleeve, eventually just ripping the material when he realized he was going to have to sit up to get it off her.
"Zelgadis-san!" she protested with a squeak as he decided that was the quickest way to disrobe her. His hands caught at the yards and yards of material and the seams did not stand a chance against his demon strength. "What are you doing?"
"It was in the way," he said simply.
"But my costume!" She looked mournfully at the rent fabric as he jerked it out from under her and tossed it onto the floor.
"You weren't planning on wearing it again, were you?" Her slip and crinoline met the same fate and she winced.
"Well, I could have!"
"No," he said finally. "No offense to you, Amelia, but I didn't like it." The Chimera rolled over onto her and buried his face in her neck.
"Zelgadis-san!" she cried, bringing her legs together and trying to cover herself with her hands. He caught at her wrist and pulled her hand away gently.
"Amelia," he whispered, kissing away her protests while he twined his fingers with hers. "Let me see you."
She flushed yet again, and he noted how prettily she did it; her face and neck turned a delicate rose color. Hesitantly, she lowered her other hand. She was clothed only in her underthings: A strapless, boned corset that cupped her breasts and pushed them up to increase her cleavage while accenting the curves on her already shapely body. Attached to the corset by thin straps, white silk stockings encased her legs. She still wore her white, heeled shoes. The sight of her clothed only in her underthings and looking up at him in innocent apprehension made him ache for her.
As he finished his visual inspection of her, the Chimera looked into the Princess' eyes and gently took her chin in his hand. "You are the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on," he breathed softly. Suddenly, the words that he could not say before, he found the strength to say them now. Leaning in close, he put his mouth near her ear and whispered: "I love you, Amelia."
Her silence was broken by gasping sob. He pushed himself up and looked down at her with concern in his eyes. "Amelia?"
She pulled her hand out of his and put his hand on his face and pulled him down and covered his lips with hers. "Zelgadis-san," she whispered when she pulled back, her lips brushing his as she moved them.
"Amelia," he repeated. "Why are you crying?" Tears stained her cheeks and rolled off onto her pillow. He put his palm on her cheek and used his thumb to brush them away.
She shook her head. "I'm crying because I'm happy, because you're here with me, finally. And because I love you." And she smiled at him.