A Poemfic off of A Different Affair.
Twisted knife,
Broken heart,
Pain and strife
Tore it apart.
Zelgadis sat at the campfire, lost in thought. Staring blankly at the flickering flames, he reflected on the past few months in his miserable life. A spark of hope had appeared suddenly, then just as suddenly had seemed to die out. The chimera had been happy for the change of pace, but of course, nothing ever seemed to play to his advantage for long. Zel put his cream half-finger gloved hands onto his face and let the tears fall under the overcast night sky.
It had been a week since he left the group. Things got too difficult to handle with the others around, so as always, he decided it was time to go. A pity really, his grief-stricken mind always seemed to ignore the fact that friends could help in a situation like this. Maybe the part of him that made him leave was the same part that got him his curse, and lost him his love.
Happy smiles,
Cheerful face,
Flamboyant wiles
I can never replace.
His thoughts travelled back to the one who had caused his current sadness. Admittedly, he had never thought of Xelloss as a love interest for himself. He liked girls, dammit! But then one day when he saw the fruitcake give that thrice-damned smile of his, Zel found himself thinking, Gods, he's really cute when he smiles.
Taking a deep breath and releasing it to the stars peeking out from behind the clouds, he laid back onto the grass. He smiled as he thought more about the priest. This didn't last long, unfortunately, as his mind reminded him once again that he was gone.
Why did it have to be this way?
Why did it have to be so unfair?
All we had to do was betray
Our false fronts and show our care.
Xelloss had just up and left one day. No 'Bye, minna-san! ^_^', no excuses, no 'call from Juuou-sama'...nothing. One minute, the mazoku had been leaning casually on a tree facing towards the group, the next, he teleported away. No one had seen or heard from his since. That was two weeks ago.
Zel had begun to worry after about five days into the priest's absence. Even when he went on 'Mazoku business', Xelloss normally didn't stray from the Slayers for any more than a couple of days. At the very least, he would pop in and say hello. But not this time. The others were worried as well, but Zelgadis felt worse. Amelia had figured out what was going on between the two of them, and had tried to comfort him. An effort which proved worthless. After a week without sign of Xelloss, the chimera left the group.
I dropped my mask,
You dropped yours,
Not a question did we ask
As the rain drenched our pores.
Seeing that the current path of his thoughts had only served to depress him more, Zel forced his mind to think about better things. Shortly before he and Xel got together, Lina had found some temple ruins that held very interesting artefacts, some predating the Kouma War. He and Lina had taken to spending most of the days there studying everything. They had still been investigating the place when a group of sorcerer hunters had shown up, ready to collect the bounty on the Enemy of All Who Live. The hunters had exceptional skill; they fought so well that the fight ended with Xelloss having to teleport the group away. Unfortunately, he had teleported them about a week's travel from the temple ruins. Lina's short attention span couldn't allow her to spend a week travelling just to get back to a temple where they had spent the past four days just to look at one room they hadn't opened up, so the group decided to move on.
They started off towards Seyruun for the annual harvest festival, scheduled to begin at the Autumn Equinox. Lina-tachi arrived a couple of days early and settled into the palace guest apartments. Gourry and Zelgadis decided to go out to practice field and spar for a while. It had been quite some time since they'd gotten the chance to just practice their skills. Amelia had dragged Lina off to the city marketplace to go shopping, so the girls were bound to be gone for a few hours.
As the two swordsmen practised, dark clouds rolled over the bright afternoon sky. A wind picked up from the north, signalling the forthcoming cold front. At one point, the gusts got so bad that Gourry had to take a ribbon attached to his new sword and tie it around his golden locks, just to keep it from blowing in his face and blocking his view. Zel had had the same problem, but he just took a couple of seconds and bent the wire strands of his own hair around his high-tipped ears, effectively keeping them out of his face. When the rain started falling, Gourry decided he'd had enough for the day. The start of the afternoon shower had been quickly followed by the announcement by the former Swordsman of Light's stomach that it needed a refill. The blond trotted inside to feast on the sumptuous banquet the royal palace staff had to offer.
Zelgadis hadn't yet tired, so he stayed outside and practised his strikes on the dummies staked into the ground around the field. After about ten minutes of that, he felt someone staring at him. When he turned around he found the trickster priest sitting on top of one of the dummies, smiling as always. He clapped his praise to Zel. "A true swordsman and sorcerer, indeed. That is rare in humans, you know."
"I was in the middle of something, you know," the chimera replied tiredly. He didn't need the distraction at the moment. "What do you want, Xelloss?"
The mazoku leapt down from his perch and landed at Zelgadis's feet. He swiftly rose to his full height. Still smiling, but now with his eyes open, he said quietly, "You." Zel just stared at Xelloss for a minute, impassive face mask tightly in place as he analysed the priest. His face was different. It held none of his usual playfulness, just the features of someone stating a simple fact. That, and his eyes. They seemed to betray a hidden desire behind the trickster's words. The fact that the playfulness had been lost from Xelloss's voice when he had answered Zelgadis didn't help to put the chimera at ease. The two stood very close together, their noses almost touching. Zel's mind finally decided to let him believe that Xelloss was being serious, and allowed himself to show his desire for the priest in his own eyes.
A simple touch,
A gentle caress,
For me it proved too much
And caused me to confess.
That look from Zelgadis seemed to be all that Xelloss needed to know. The trickster ran his own eyes over the chimera's face. He raised a rain-soaked glove along Zel's cheek, feeling the rough texture of the darker pebbles and the smoothness of the light grey blue of the rest of Zel's stone skin. "Like marble with patches of pumice embedded in it," Xel mused allowed, a wondrous tone inflected in his voice.
The soft caress felt so good to Zelgadis. It had been a long time since anyone had wanted to touch him. He found himself moving his head, nudging the priest's hand, revelling in the sensation. Xelloss brought his other hand up to Zel's other cheek, repeating the motion he'd taken with his right hand. Then he moved forward, pressing against the stone man and lowering his head to capture Zel's lips in a tender kiss. He was slightly surprised when Zelgadis returned the kiss, in earnest. Taking advantage of the sign of approval, Xelloss teleported the two of them back to his bedroom in the palace.
With an absent thought, a lock spell held fast the door and a silence spell kept outside sound out and any sounds inside localised to within the four walls that comprised the room. Xelloss broke the kiss and moved his lips up to Zel's ear, running his tongue along the edge. When he reached the tip, he whispered, "We should get these wet things off; don't want to catch a cold, ne Zel-chan?"
Zelgadis didn't miss the playful tone in the trickster's voice. He could practically see the smirk on the other man's face. Getting the right idea as to where this conversation was headed, he blushed furiously, quite a feat for someone with blue stone skin. "You do have point," he weakly conceded. "But I'm not taking everything off."
"Aw, why not?" Xelloss pouted, pulling away so he stood face to face with the chimera.
"Because I don't trust you that much, fruitcake."
"Mou, Zel-chan, why not?" his voice took on a more sultry tone as he brushed his fingers along Zel's chest. "You know you want to."
Zelgadis tensed at the trickster's touch. He was starting to get over his head, but Xelloss was right; he did want it. It had been far too long, and he had someone willing. Better yet that that someone seemed to want it too. He closed his eyes and lost himself again in the sensations as Xel pressed himself up against him for the second time in the past few minutes, this time slipping his hands under Zel's tunic. One coherent thought ran through his brain, When did my belts come off? That thought soon lost importance as Zel slipped his own hands around Xelloss's back. "You're right, we should get these wet clothes off."
The next morning found the two lying in bed together, arms interlocked around the other's body in a tight embrace. Zelgadis awoke, bleary eyes opening to see a sea of purple in his face. Realising the shade was too dark to be his own, his eyes snapped open to see Xelloss sleeping peacefully, his hair askew, covering his face. Zel lifted a hand and wiped away the messy locks. He looks so innocent like this. It's hard to believe that he really is who he is. I didn't even think Mazoku slept...
Xel began to rouse from the light touch of Zelgadis's hand upon his cheek. He opened his eyes, looked up at Zel, and smiled. "'Morning."
"'Morning."
The mazoku propped himself up on his elbow and bent forward, kissing the chimera. "That was fun last night, ne?"
"...yeah," Zel blushed.
"I never did figure out how I could get my masochistic tendencies into the bedroom. My sadist ones, of course, that's easy enough. But the pleasure and pain I got last night felt...exquisite, Zel-chan," the priest sighed. "Care to go for an encore performance?"
Zelgadis blushed even more. "Xelloss! I'm sore. I've never done that before...with a guy, I mean," he added quickly.
"Yes, I suppose you would be a bit sore after the first time. Why don't we try to work out that soreness, then?" Xel took Zelgadis and rolled him onto his stomach. "You have such a beautiful body, you know. There's no need to hide it under all those silly clothes." He crawled behind Zel and straddled his legs. He then began to massage the stone man's feet. He worked his way up Zel's body, and finished with his shoulders. After that, he flipped the chimera over and massaged the front half, being careful to not arouse him again. He knew Zel wasn't ready to do it again just yet, no use teasing the poor boy. Zel just relaxed and closed his eyes. Xelloss's strength must be incredible. No one else I know would be able to give me a massage.
Looking up at Xelloss as he rubbed Zel's arms, the chimera grabbed the taller man and brought him down for a kiss. They stayed that way for several minutes, only breaking for air. When the kiss finally ended, Zel trailed his lips up Xel's jaw and to his ear. Holding him close to his chest, he whispered, "Aishiteru." Xel jerked up at this, blinking repeatedly at Zel's smiling face, completely confused. That face hurt Zelgadis; he hadn't been expecting the same answer from his lover, but he hadn't expected him to look like he didn't understand.
I wish I hadn't done,
I wish you had stayed,
For if your love could've been won
From the group I wouldn't have strayed.
Shortly after the Harvest Festival came to a close, the group started off again, this time towards New Sairaag. Gourry had finally figured out that Sylphiel liked him, and he felt the same way. The two had been sending letters back and forth for the last six months. The last letter the swordsman sent had included a gold band and a simple note saying, "If you'll be my bride when I return, simply send back the letter without the ring." They received the note back the second day into the festival, and Gourry was ecstatic.
Zel on the other hand, spiralled into depression. Xelloss had tried to ignore him most of the time for the last several days. That made the pain he felt even worse. What if I scared him away by saying that? he mused. I was finally happy, and then I screwed it up. Stupid, stupid, stupid...
A couple days after leaving Seyruun, Xelloss made his disappearance. Lina tried to comfort Zel when she saw his suffering, but the chimera just threw up his mental walls and refused the sorceress entrance.
Now I'm all alone,
With only sadness and fear,
We never should have known
That we held the other dear.
Amelia attempted the same task as Lina, but failed just as miserably. After Zelgadis snapped at her for pestering him, the princess stopped trying completely and ran off into the woods for a few hours, crying out her frustrations. This is one of the things that helped Zel decide to go. Not only had he let himself be hurt by this, he'd hurt the others, his friends. His mind told him this meant he shouldn't stay around them any longer, so he went. He left behind a note, informing his friends of some of his reasons for leaving, and that he most likely wouldn't rejoin them any time soon.
Now, as he sat his campfire, all alone, the tears wouldn't stop coming. While he stayed with the others, he could hold them off; but not anymore. Only him and nature. He wrapped himself into a tight ball on his bedroll in front of the dancing flames. Zel couldn't take it anymore. If he knew why Xelloss left, any reason at all, he was sure he'd feel a little better about all this. But the mazoku had just gone, not leaving a single clue behind as to his whereabouts. Deciding that he would cry himself to sleep once again, Zelgadis pulled the top layer of the bedroll over his weary form and attempted to fall asleep.
Warm hands,
But only a dream's scene,
He understands
How much I mean.
Zel smiled. He found himself in a warm, sunlit room; the curtains surrounding the canopy bed he sat in turned golden by the setting sun's rays. A shadow approached the bed, then pulled open a side of the curtains, revealing a longed-for face. Zelgadis stretched out his arms and let Xelloss slide into his ready embrace. The two collapsed onto the mattress, the springs only giving slightly under their combined weight. Their clothes soon found their way to the floor as their hands wandered, caressing and teasing the sensitive spots.
After both had satisfied their needs, they snuggled under the covers, legs and arms entwined. Xelloss rested his head upon Zel's chest, his eyes half closed. "Feel better now?"
"Much," Zelgadis managed.
"Good....Zel-chan?" he asked, seeming uneasy. He lifted himself to look at his lover and caressed the chimera's face.
Zel let his head fall lazily into Xel's palm as he had that first night. "Hmm?"
"Gomen. About last time, I mean." He looked away.
Zelgadis just pulled him into an embrace. "It's okay," he smiled. "You're here now, and that's all that matters."
"Yeah," Xelloss whispered. He went in for another kiss. "Ai - "
His words were cut off as a large sword embedded itself in his lower spine. Xelloss's eyes practically bugged out of his head as his smiling features twisted in immense pain. Zel caught him as he slumped forward and the chimera looked around the room for the attacker. Damn these stupid curtains! he thought. Ripping them away, he came face to face with the Greater Beast. She had changed from her usual white shift-like dress to full battle armour, complete with long sword. She snarled at him as he got in the way of her second blade, blocking every blow with his stone skin.
Soon, the sword had dulled beyond use, and Zelas threw it away in favour of daggers. She tossed three with black hilts in the direction of the still unmoving Xelloss. Zel barely stopped them from hitting him. When the chimera turned quickly to remove the sword from Xelloss, whom he had just confirmed was dead, Zelas managed to throw a red-hilted dagger at him. This one pierced his skin, directly into his stomach. Zel gasped at the sudden pain and the amount of blood flowing through the wound. The Greater Beast chuckled darkly and vanished. Zelgadis pulled out the enchanted dagger, and tried to heal himself, but he had already weakened too much to do more than knit some of the stone flesh back together. He stopped trying after a few minutes and laid back down with Xelloss's corpse in his arms. Zel kissed the mazoku one last time as his vision dimmed to nothingness.
Zel awoke with a start, sitting up and breathing heavily. He stayed that way for several minutes, catching his breath as best as he could. He sighed shakily as he laid back down on his bedroll. The nightmare refused to leave his mind, however, and he spent the rest of the night staring at the stars.
Now where does he roam?
Does he miss me?
I return home
Yet at the house it is him I see.
Using that time in the darkness to plan his next move, the shaman considered his options. Xelloss had gone, possibly forever. He could always look for his cure, but he wasn't sure if he cared enough about life anymore to worry about that. Then an idea popped into his head quite unexpectedly. Go home. He blinked. That really didn't sound like a bad idea at the moment, so that's what he decided to do.
Once the sun broke free from the horizon, he started off in the direction of his hometown. As luck or his subconscious mind would have it, he didn't have far to travel, and arrived in about 2 days, travelling at a normal pace, not bothering with his chimerical speed. Zel pulled up his hood and mask as he entered the city. He took the time to look at all the old familiar sights and sounds of his life before living with Rezo.
He finally exited the main part of the city and headed towards his home late in the afternoon. He passed through the small grove of trees that served to block out the town market noise with ease until he came up to an all too memorable small clearing. Seeing the fallen tree blocking his path to the house, covered with scars left by his sword's blade on that day, brought back too many bad emotions for him to bear. Zel hurtled over the tree and ran as fast as he could in the direction of his home, eyes and head lowered to stare at the ground, not daring to look back. He didn't realise how close he was to the door until he tripped on the stairs leading up to the porch and hit his head hard on the granite floor. Zelgadis winced as the pain burned through his brain. He sat down on the steps, facing out towards the forest, and lifted his hands to his head, using a light healing spell to ease the pain. He closed his eyes as the spell started to take effect.
Thus, he missed the two arms coming around his back and encircling his waist, capturing the chimera in a warm embrace. A head came to rest on his shoulder, nuzzling into his neck. "I thought I'd find you here," the person whispered.
Zel started at the embrace and the voice. He put one of his arms around the person's head and turned with hopeful eyes towards the other's face, finding a pair of amethyst shards smiling back at him. Xelloss released him, allowing Zelgadis to turn and wrap his arms around Xelloss. They sat that way for a while as Zel tried to convince his brain, that 'Yes, this is real. He's here, and hopefully, he won't be leaving.
"You're really here, right?"
Xel chuckled mirthfully. "Yes, of course I am, Zel-chan! And I'm not going off again this time. I convinced my mistress that you're worth watching, so she'll let me follow you now. Besides, we travel with Lina-san often enough that I should be able to keep track of her pretty well, too, ne?"
"So, your master isn't going to show up and kill you for being here with me?"
Xelloss blinked repeatedly, shaking his head in disbelief. "Juuou-sama would never do such a thing to me. I'm her most loyal servant. She knows she can trust me not to disobey her in favour of my own agendas....Zel-chan? Wherever did your mind come up with something like that?"
Zelgadis blushed. "Uh...nevermind. Let's go inside, okay? I haven't been here in years."
"Sure," Xelloss smiled as he stood. Offering his hand, the two walked into the house together.