Part 6: Wai! Approaching Tromper


Woods and mountains soon surrounded the group as they journeyed towards Tromper. Lina-tachi settled down for the night in a grove of trees. A waterfall cascaded down nearby, falling into a small pond. Upon sight of this natural beauty, one thought came into their minds.

"Bath-time!" they chorused.

After laying out the bedrolls and starting a fire for dinner, they headed over to the pond. Zel knelt by the water's edge and called forth a modified Dug Haut, creating a wall of stone separating the pond in half for privacy while they bathed. The girls hurried over to the right side, quickly stripping off their soiled outfits and pulling out the soap to wash themselves and their clothes. The boys weren't quite so enthusiastic, but nonetheless took off their own clothing and waded into the left side of the refreshing water.

Once all the cleaning had been done, the girls leaned back on the wall near the waterfall and let themselves soak for a while.

"The past few days have been pretty great, ne minna-san?" Amelia stated.

"Yeah," came the consensus from Sylphiel.

"You know what the bad thing is though? This is the perfect time to be ambushed," Lina replied, effectively killing the relaxing mood.

Suddenly a scream rang out from the other side of the pond. The girls all jumped up, facing the wall, spells at ready if whatever had attacked decided it wanted to see what lay hidden behind the barrier. They listened for the next few minutes to the sounds of splashing water and grunting before a large flying object landed in their side of the pool with a crash and a great wall of water rising from the surface as the laws of buoyancy went into effect.

From the other side of the stone wall, the girls heard shouts of "Hentai!" and "Fruitcake Bastard!" The object rose from the water, soaked purple hair clinging to his head and a big smile planted on his face. Xelloss turned towards the girls, waving, and said, "Hello!" Sylphiel, Amelia, and Lina reacted thusly:

"Eek!" Sylph cried, covering herself.

Amelia covered her ample cleavage and shouted, "Pervert!"

Lina somehow managed to pull a towel from hammerspace and rose her hands above her head. "Mega Brando!" She exclaimed, bringing her hands down towards the pond's algae-covered floor in the direction of the offending and quite nekkid priest.

Within milliseconds, Xelloss was in the air, soaring over a mile skywards before beginning his decent. As luck would have it, he landed back in the boys' side of the pond. Not that that made Zel and Gourry any happier than they had been when they flung him out. Taking that as their 'ambush,' the girls settled back down. Amelia cast a small Fireball into the water, making for a quite enjoyable hot tub.

Of course, now the ambush started.

A group of trolls appeared through the woods. True, a bunch of trolls would be no match for Lina-tachi, but it's still rather annoying.

"Dammit!" Lina screeched. "I have no chest! I know that, everyone else I travel with seems to know that, and the fans know that! So why do the idiot writers keep putting me in situations where I'll have to fight without a top on?!?!?"

Sweatdrops all around at the statement, including the brighter of the trolls. Since the more sentient ones recovered from Lina's rant quicker, they scrambled to get some sort of clothing on. There was no way in hell they were going to fight in their birthday suits!

Gourry and Zelgadis shoved on their pants and picked up their swords, starting to cut down the first flank of trolls while the girls finished dressing. Amelia finished first, bedecked in a pull-over shirt and a pair of loose shorts. She came up behind the boys and started flinging out Flare Arrows and Elmekia Lances. Lina let out a string of curses as she tried to pull up her magenta tights around her water-drenched legs. If anyone has tried to put on something form-fitting right after a bath or shower without towelling off all the water on your body, you know exactly how Lina feels right now. She finally gave up and threw on a pair of shorts similar to Amelia's and joined the ruckus. Sylphiel took her time; she knew the only help she could provide in a battle of these proportions was healing the wounds afterwards.

After getting her own tights on, the shrine maiden looked around at the fight. Lina-tachi were winning, as per usual, although slowly. Her darling Gourry-sama slashed his sword through the enemy, Lina-san coming behind and attacking the troll with a spell. The troll then turned in on itself. Sylph found this quite gross, but it did the job. She turned her view towards Zelgadis and Amelia, who were apparently doing the same thing, but both shamanists were damaging and destroying. Those two are almost in unison, she thought to herself. Kowaii... Noticing that she only saw four people fighting, Sylphiel looked around for Xelloss. "Hmm...where could he have gone?"


The trickster priest didn't show up later that day, or the next for that matter. They decided to move on without him and continue on to Tromper. After all, this wasn't the first time Xel had disappeared without notice, and he always turned up eventually. Usually when they least wanted to see him. The didn't care what he was doing, either. Normally, when he showed back up again and they asked him what happened, they received one of two answers, "Sore wa himitsu desu", or "Mazoku business", so they didn’t bother anymore.


Hundreds of miles away in the Demon Sea, a lone figure reclined on a couch. The air held a taint of smoke, fur, and sweet Zefilian wine. Another puff of smoke drifted to the ceiling as the figure took a drag on her cigarette and exhaled.

A second figure appeared in the great hall that served as the first's throne room. He came forward to the couch and knelt low on one knee, his head declined in a symbol of respect. The woman eyed her highest servant with an air of appraisal. When she found him favourable, she whisked her unoccupied hand out towards him. Understanding the long practised gesture, the man took her proffered hand in his own lavender-gloved one and gently kissed the dark tanned skin of his master.

Formalities completed for the latest of an innumerable string of times, the Greater Beast and her priest got down to business.


The group entered the valley leading to Tromper the next night. The stars shone like almost-microscopic Christmas lights, strung in random patterns across the sky. Well, to any normal person they'd be random; to L-sama, they were chaotic. Everyone set out their bedrolls and headed off to sleep after dining.

Zel had the second watch that night. He leaned his thin form against a tall rock formation as he sat, sword on the ground at his side. Staring up at the sky, the chimera meditated on his life thus far, waiting for the time to wake Lina up for the next watch. When his elongated ears picked up rustling sounds, Zelgadis darted his eyes back towards the ground, only to find Lina standing right next to him. He looked at her, confusion barely hidden from his features. How the hell did she get this close without me hearing her? Some guard I am... he thought bitterly.

"Copper for your thoughts, Zel?" Lina said, smiling at him as she sat down to his right.

Zel turned his eyes back to the fire in the middle of the camp, staring at the flames. "What are you doing up already? Your shift doesn't start for another couple of hours, y'know."

"Yeah, but I'm really not all that tired. Besides, how can a person stand to sleep when there's so much to be excited about! We'll make it to the temple tomorrow! Gold, treasures, magic spells, money..." the sorceress went off into a 5-minute rant on all the wonders she hoped to acquire.

"Assuming the temple is there."

"Aw, Zel, don't be such a sourpuss," Lina admonished him. "You should be happy, dammit! That place could hold your cure!"

"Well, sorry, Lina, but I'm not the optimist you are and you know it. I've had to deal with the ugly truth over the years that legends are sometimes simply that, legends. I won't be able to be happy about this until we find a temple to search, if then."

Lina snorted. A few minutes of silence passed between the two of them as they stared into the flames. "What will make you happy, Zel?"

That wasn't anything Zelgadis was expecting to hear. He blinked at her. "Huh?"

"You're never happy. You'll smile on occasion, sure, but that's normally because you're teasing one of us, or someone cracks a joke, but you're never really happy, are you?" It came out as more of a statement than as a question. "I've only seen you smile, truly smile a few rare times in all the years I've known you. I like seeing that smile, so what do you need to make it come out more?"

That earned her one of what she was looking for as Zel shook his head. He sighed. "You know what I want."

"Yeah, but is that going to make you happy?"

"Of course it will!"

"How?"

"No one will look at me like a freak anymore! I'll get to be a normal human being again!"

"No one who travels with Lina Inverse is a normal human being, Zel. Do you plan on not travelling with us anymore?"

"...no...You're not saying I can't travel with you anymore if I get my cure, are you?"

"Of course not, Zel!" Lina quickly replied, waving her hands in self-defence. "I just saying 'what's normal?', y'know? None of us can hardly be called normal. We're a bunch of sorcerers, swordsmen, and well, Xelloss. Just because you'll be human again, you won't be normal, especially if you've still got your magic. And even if you don't, you're still an excellent swordsman."

"Hmph."

"You are! And I don't give out compliments lightly, you know that."

"Yeah, maybe. But, I could lose that, too. I do have demon strength, you know. But I really don't care about that. I just want to get rid of this awful curse so I don't have to go around with this on all the time" He gestured to his hood and facemask "without people staring."

"You don't need it," Lina stated softly.

"Huh?"

Great, Zel would pick that up. Just should've left it in my head. Lina no baka. She turned towards him. "I said you don't need the damn mask and hood!" Zelgadis just gave her one of those 'yeah, right' faces. "Really! I mean, none of us care what you look like. Hell, we've never seen you any other way. It's gonna weird seeing you fully human. Well, maybe not 'weird', but it will take some getting used to..." she trailed off.

Zel shook his head again, eyes turning towards the fire with a smirk on his face. "I think you've rambled enough for one night, Lina." He looked up at the moon. "It's your watch; I'm going to bed. 'Night."

"'Night, Zel."


The next morning, they packed up and headed out. The gang travelled through the valley, aptly nicknamed Namida no Keikoku, or Valley of Tears. Wild winds whipped across the width of the basin, tossing up clouds of sand as they passed. Zel turned out to be the only one unaffected; his as Lina put it 'damn hood and mask' kept out the offending sand just fine. The others got the full punishment, sand blowing up into their eyes and making them cry. If anyone had been watching, they would've seen a ridiculous sight. One man dressed from head to toe in cream-coloured clothing walked swiftly by. He was followed by a redheaded sorceress, a black-haired shrine maiden, a swordsman with long blond hair, and a raven-haired princess all cowering as they went along, hands to their faces and weeping as gusts of sand-filled wind swirled about them.

A couple of hours before sunset, the five reached the rock face that would lead up to where the temple lay. The group decided to go into Tromper after searching the temple; the city would serve as a celebration place. About half an hour ago, Gourry had hit a stroke of brilliance and suggested "Why don't we just fly there or something?", which sparked off Sylphiel's mind to suggest using Raywing bubbles to repel the sand. Thus, for the last thirty minutes of their trip, the group remained sand-free. The winds calmed along the edge of the valley, making it possible to fly up the side instead of taking to the arduous task of climbing. Within a few minutes Lina-tachi were within sight of the temple.

A once truly gorgeous building, the ancient temple of Tromper now lay in ruins. All but two of the polished marble pillars had fallen, and the roof had apparently caved-in in some of the sections, but as they flew over the structure, no one could see any debris on the floor below. They landed in front of the main entrance and went inside. The sun had already begun its descent for the night, so the consensus was made to wait until morning to explore the ruins. The group settled down for the night quickly after dinner, but only Gourry actually slept much.

The sun returned, and brought with it a smiling Xelloss, floating in the middle of their circle of sleeping bags. "Étés-vous prête, toute la monde?"

Sylphiel looked up at the priest groggily. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes as she mechanically began the preparations for breakfast, she responded, "Wha?"

Lina also sat up from her bedroll and squinted at Xel. "What the hell are you saying, Xelloss? Whatever language you're speaking, I don't know it."

"Hmm? Oh, gomen nasai! I was practising a new language before I came over. I guess I'm still thinking in that mode."

"What language, Xelloss-san? I've never heard anything like that before," Ame chimed.

"It's called French, Ame-chan. One of those languages from the other side of the barrier. My mistress has got me learning all sorts of new languages. It really sucks."

"So, going to do some more work over there, ne?" Zel asked.

"Sore wa himitsu desu, Zel-kun." ^_^

Gourry woke up and sniffed the air. His eyes snapped open. "Food!" he exclaimed, then ran over to gobble down whatever Sylph had ready.

"Hey, jellyfish brains, leave some for me!" Lina screamed. Amelia and Zel just sighed and put away their bedrolls as the redhead stalked over to Gourry and bashed him over the head with the first thing she could grab, which just happened to be a skillet Sylphiel was in the process of putting onto the fire.

After breakfast and a little plan-making, everyone headed out to search around the temple.


Part 7   |   Fanfiction