I walk through the streets, alone once more. Of course, I always feel like I'm alone, whether I actually am or not, so I guess it really doesn't matter much. Maybe that will change soon.
For once, I smile. I don't think I've smiled since the last time I was with the group. Funny that I'm not with them now. I frown again. I wish they could be here. Any one of them. They're all my friends, whether I'd admit that to them or not.
Why did I smile? The grin returns, hidden behind my ivory facemask. In my arms I carry a small book. But this is an important book. A spell book. And most importantly of all, Rezo's spell book. A journal of his original spells, along with instructions and the spells' reversals. I can only pray to the gods one spell in particular is in here. Perhaps I should try to find the gang again before I do anything. It would be nice to have them there with me.
I open the door to my inn room and step inside. Quiet, dark, serene. I light the small lamp at the window and sit down behind the desk. The book has not been kept well; I must deal with it carefully. Slowly, I lift the cover and
"Whatcha doin', Zel-kun?"
jump, then growl. The intruder made me tear the binding of the first page. I close the book and hold it to my chest protectively as I stand and turn to face him. Xelloss.
"What do you want?" I impatiently reply.
He just smiles. "Sore wa himitsu desu!" Should've guessed that response, I really should've. "Ne, what are you up to, Zelgadis-san? Think you'll find your cure in that book?"
I narrow my eyes in suspicion. He's acting like he knows what book this is. I'll bet he knows exactly where to find my cure, the bastard. "Allow me to repeat myself, Xelloss. What do you want?"
The priest approaches me. My eyes zoom towards his hand, expecting to see the staff that isn't there. He always had it with him before. What's he up to...?
Xelloss stops in front of me. If not for the height difference, we'd be nose to nose, almost. His eyes open, searching my own for a moment. "You're lonely, ne?"
Huh? I blink. "Ano..."
"Wouldn't you like to not be lonely, Zelgadis-san?" he wraps his strong arms around me as my mind continues to be completely blank. "I can take away that loneliness, if you'll let me," he whispers.
Oh. That's what he's talking about. But why is Xelloss of all people asking me this? Is he lonely, too? He has always seemed so carefree, so happy. But I've never actually seen him outside of the group setting before...Why is my heart racing? I don't like him like that!!!
He tilts his head slightly, then moves forward. Oh gods, he's not going to -- oh, he did. His lips are so soft, like the insides of an orange. His eyes are closed again, but not in his usual annoying smile. Simply closed to the world. The surge of emotions rushes through me and I close my own eyes as the book slips from my hands, revelling in the gentle caress. It's been far too long since I've been kissed.
I wrap my arms around his waist and lean into him, returning the favour. He seems to melt against me. I guess he likes that I'm not jerking away. We stay that way for several minutes. Xelloss breaks off the embrace of lips and we open our eyes. He smiles. I've never seen him smile like this before. So...gentle, inviting. A complete opposite from the one he normally wears. I rest my head on his shoulder and sigh. That was very nice, even if it was him. Perhaps it was because it was him, some part of my mind questions. Maybe so.
I almost hate to ask, fearing his usual response, but I ask anyway. "Are you lonely too?"
"Hai," he whispers. "But I think we can fix that for both of us, ne?" I smile into his shoulder and nod. "Good." He brings my head up to face him as we kiss again. Mmm...wonderful. This time I'm the one that melts, but all he does is hold me tighter to his chest, supporting me. Gods he's strong. Guess I should've figured that, really.
Somehow, he divests me of my cloak. I didn't even notice it happen, but now it's gone. I pull back as the kiss ends and blink at the disappearance. Oh my, his cloak and tunic are gone as well...um, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with the way things look to be headed. But the moonlight bathes Xelloss in such soft light, it's as if he's glowing. My hands move across the contours of his upper torso, totally of their own accord, while I search his face. I've never seen him this open. I can see every emotion as it travels across his face, his mind. Every increase in pleasure as my hands trail along his skin, mapping their way, memorising the places they rested when I saw his face contort in ecstasy.
As my hands reach his back once more, his own reach up underneath my tunic, tracing the edges of the small stones embedded on my abdomen. The feeling proves too soothing. A low moan escapes my throat, and he caught it, too. He grabs my arms and pulls them from his form. Did I actually whimper at that? Oh dear. Ah, I see, he needed to have my arms up so he could pull my tunic off...NANI???
I stiffen as I consider this. Yep, if he's undressing me like this, we are definitely headed somewhere I'm not sure I'm ready for. Not the fact that it's with Xelloss, really, just the fact that it's with another guy. Oh yes, new territory, indeed. But it feels so good...ah well, my rational mind can shut the hell up tonight. I relax while Xel caresses me again. I return my hands to his back, holding him close once more. The sudden movement puts us off balance, toppling our bodies to the floor, him on top of me.
Xelloss smirks. "I figured I'd end up on top," he chuckles.
"Fruitcake."
"Wanna find out just how 'fruity' I can be, Zel-chan?"
Zel-chan? That's new. I raise my head and meet his, locking lips. "Does that answer?"
"Oh yes. That answers plenty." I suddenly find myself being assaulted by his strong, hot hands all over my chest and arms as he kisses along my neck. He presses himself up against me. Oh, well, he's quite aroused, isn't he? Quite frankly, so am I by this point.
I guess he felt that, because now he's working at my pants. Xelloss quickly recognises his mistake and tugs off my boots, then pries the pants off of my legs, leaving me only in my underwear.
"Aw, what cute little briefs, Zel-chan!" he exclaims. "Bai-bai, briefs!" Said undergarments are then ripped off. Good thing we're in my inn room. At least that means I have more pairs to replace those with.
He looks down at what he just uncovered, nodding approvingly. My own eyes travel down his form, barely noticing as his black silk pants dissolve away into nothingness. Xel spreads my legs apart, then kneels between them and lowers himself onto me once more. The sensual assault of my senses restarts, this time attacking all parts of my body, filling every orifice he can find with his fingers and tongue. Yet the one place that needs attention the most is ignored. Tricky bastard, even during this. My breathing becomes erratic as he continues, focusing his attentions lower on my body.
Finally, he takes me into his hands, caressing the shaft lightly with his fingertips. Lightning goes through my veins. At least, that's what it feels like. My hips jolt up in reaction, instinctively urging him on. He continues, a smirk on his face. My own hands start to wander, stroking his chest. I turn my eyes to his face. His eyes are closed again, but it's still not the same as it usually is. I think I like this better. I pull him down further so I can kiss him again. He makes a little squeak as I lick the edge of his ear, then sighs. I can't believe I have power over him. But I really don't care about that right now. I just don't want him to stop.
Wait, what's he doing now? He moves his head down between my legs. Gods! Ooh, he's a tease with that tongue of his... I feel like I'm going to explode. My hands clench in my crumpled cloak, trying to maintain some level of control over myself. Oh, he sucks. Literally. I release, falling into waves of pleasure. It's been a long time. Too long.
Xelloss comes back up my body, slithering atop me as he attacks my lips with his own once more. I kiss him back slightly, still trying to catch my breath. I'm so tired. I searched all day for that damn book, and now all this hasn't helped me regain any energy in the least. His hands start their movements again, arousing my weakened body. I can't do this again. I manage to gasp out as much between our joined lips. He whimpers slightly but complies with my silent request for a halt to our activities, lying his head down on my chest directly over my heart and sighing sadly. I stroke his hair. It's so soft, like rabbit fur.
"You, you understand, right? I'd love to continue, but I just don't have your stamina, I guess."
"Hmm," he acquiesces. "I know, Zel-chan, I know. I'll have my turn another night.... There...will be another night, right?"
Gods, he sounds so uncertain. It could just be an act, a part of my mind cautions. But I think I'll continue to ignore that part of my brain tonight. I already shot logic to hell by consenting to all this, and I'm much happier for it. Even if this is some sort of perverted plot of his, I' ll fall for it quite willingly, if only it means spending time like this. "Of course there will."
"Good."
"Good night, Xelloss."
"Good night, Zel-chan. Pleasant dreams."
The next morning, I find myself lying in bed, still completely nude, and now, completely alone. I search the room for any sign that he was actually there at all last night, save for my state of dress and the book dropped haphazardly on the floor, but find nothing. My heart falls as I collapse on the mattress, the bed giving a squeak of protest.
I look out the window. The sun has already risen above the buildings surrounding the inn. It's probably around ten or so. Time to get up. I rise, dress, then go to the inn's common room for my morning coffee. I bring it back to the room and sit down at the desk, finally returning to the task I started last night.
I take a sip from the warm mug and open the book, ignoring the leaf torn from its bindings. Trying to ignore last night's events. The first twenty pages or so contain some rather interesting-looking spells, but nothing I wish to worry about right now. They have nothing to do with me. In the margins, Rezo put little personal notes about the spells, what happened in his life during the time he created them, etc. I do stop to read some of this. Though I knew him most of my life, I never really knew much about him. And I haven't wanted to. However, I think I'm starting to see what Lina had suggested, that Shabranigdo slowly took him over. The notes this man made seem nothing like the person I knew as Rezo the Red Priest.
Ah, here are some things on his chimera research! A smile spreads across my face as I look at his experimentation notes. Maybe I will find my cure in here. This information still comes from too far ahead in time. I probably wasn't even born yet when he was doing this stuff. I skip forward, now about ¾ of the way through the text. He's working with Eris now. Good, she joined him about a year before he changed me. I skim the pages, looking for any references to me. He seems to be worrying quite a bit about his legacy now, but he won't say what it is. Not that that matters to me; I know all about Zanafar. There, my eyes catch a glimpse of the word 'Zelgadis' in the text. I go to the beginning of the page and read.
'I had a dream a few nights ago, the first night I spent in the home of my daughter and her family. In it, I found her youngest son out in the woods, perhaps while I took a tour of the area, and watched as he practiced his swordsmanship. A thought entered my mind, "He is the perfect candidate." I stepped forward, exchanged some words with the boy, then struck. I heard not the words to my spell, but when it was finished, he had been transformed. A perfect creature. My berserker.
'As I left their home several days later, I trekked through the forest, stopping when I heard the sounds of a sword whistling through the air. I came upon my grandson, Zelgadis, finding him just as I had in the dream. With my mage-sight, I watched the boy swing his blade, a chant of the word "Tsuyoku," strong, his only speech. He slashed down, catching the sword in a fallen tree, then froze as I approached him. I asked him if he wanted to be strong, then told him I could give him the power he wished for in return for his help in finding the Philosopher's Stone. He agreed, and the dream became reality.
'A power I know not from whence it came flashed through myself and then my staff, transforming the boy. He became a perfect mesh of brow demon, rock golem, and human, yet I know not how it happened. Only that I did it. He fell to the ground, curled in on himself in pain. Not surprising, seeing how I had just ripped him apart then merged him with two other whole beings.
'I transported the two of us back to my mansion in Sairaag shortly thereafter, returning to my work with Eris. His help will aid in the search for my cure, but not until my puppet heals. If his parents ask about the boy, I will tell them Zelgadis is dead, for he is. Only my berserker, my puppet, my eyes and searching hands remains.'
I slam the book shut. I hadn't found an answer yet, but I'm too angry at the moment to care. He didn't give a damn about what he'd done! He only cared that I was his little pet, forced to bend to his will. And he had no idea how he'd done it. No wonder he put me through so many experiments in the early days. Well, once he'd found a way to cut me open. A part of my mind wonders if he ever found anything in those experiments, but the rest doesn't care. I'm still not thinking rationally yet.
I storm out of the inn, barely remembering to put my hood and mask up as I stalked down the streets. I need to calm down, relax. What I'd really like to do is blow something up right now, but I don't have the money to pay for whatever I destroy. Unlike a certain redheaded friend of mine, I don't raid bandit camps when my funds are depleted...unless I'm travelling with her, that is. Actually, finding a bandit camp and giving them an all expenses paid trip to kingdom come doesn't really sound like a bad idea at the moment...NO! I am not going to start acting like Lina just because I'm pissed as hell. That's not my way. I have more self-control than this. Breathe, Zel, breathe.
As I stop walking, I find myself in front of a tavern. The aromas of baked bread, roasting meat and brewed ale waft through the open entrance, filling my senses. I only now realise that I haven't had anything to eat since yesterday morning, so I head inside and find a secluded table near the back. The waitress takes my order quickly and efficiently, leaving as quietly as she came. I sit back and take in the view as I wait for my meal, then make a small grumble to the gods for being so damn obliging to my wishes for once. Sitting not too far from me, I spot none other than Lina Inverse and Gourry Gabriev. The slight redheaded sorceress and tall blond swordsman have already made two waiters faint at the amount of food they' re trying to order. I shake my head and chuckle softly in the shadows; I guess this town has never had to cater to the adventurers/bottomless pits.
They finally finish the ordering process and do as I did; look around the restaurant to fill the boring waiting time. Despite last night, and quite possibly because of how it ended this morning, I feel rather lonely. I take down my mask, but not my hood. Maybe they'll recognise me, maybe they won' t. I won't make myself known, but if they notice my presence, I would definitely welcome their company right now.
"Oi, Zelgildogas!" Close enough. Years I've travelled with this group, but Gourry still can't say my first name right. Ah well, at least he calls me 'Zel'. That works just fine.
His call and big wave to me signals Lina as well. "Hey Zel!" she smiles. "Come over here and sit with us, ne?" I quickly comply, pulling out a chair and sitting beside her, the safer of the two to be near during mealtime. After all, she's the one who lashes out violently when her food is stolen. Sitting near the food thief could mean getting a stray fireball to the face.
For once, my meeting up with Lina doesn't start a long and arduous fight for my life. The three of us chatted around our meals, catching up on recent events in our lives, though I left out last night's happenings, then we parted ways afterwards. As I head back to the inn, I remember something the sorceress informed me of. Amelia is getting married in two months. Perhaps I'll go to the wedding. Perhaps not. I'll probably have to; Amelia will want all her friends there. At least she's finally over that silly affectation for me that she had.
I gasp as I re-enter my room, spotting my guest from last night lounging on the bed. He looks up as I look down at him, smiling lazily in the dim orange light created by the setting sun. I frown once more and go to sit at the desk, crossing arms and legs as I stare at him. "Why did you leave last night? You didn't even say goodbye."
Gods, he's gorgeous when he looks sheepish. "Mazoku business," Xelloss meekly replies. "Ne, ne, you up for a continuation of last night, Zel-chan?" he crawls along the bed like a lion slinking across the prairie, then slides off the mattress and into my lap. I uncross my arms and legs, holding him to myself as he nips along my neck and ears.
I sigh as sensations fly through my body. However do I survive without touch like this? How did I before last night? Ah well, I want to give in again. He drags me over to the bed, disrobes the both of us as my hands trail over his body, then lays me down upon the mattress before joining me. The assault on my senses continues as he attacks with hands, lips, legs, hips...Gods, I think I may lose it soon if he keeps this up. Wait a minute...
My lover squeaks as I grab him around the waist and roll over, flipping positions. Why the confused face, Xelloss? You didn't get your turn last night; I'm merely repaying the favour. I tell him as much with a playful smirk, pleased at the smirk with appears on his own visage. "Well, then, be my guest," he cheerfully replies. I think I'll take him up on that.
This feels so wonderful, being so close to him. One hand wanders around his chest while the other plays lower, my mouth exploring the area of his neck. My fingers encircle him gently, causing a small moan to erupt from his throat. Well, turnabout is fair play, Xelloss. You played with me, showed me ecstasy. I can only try to do the same for you, ne? I slowly begin pumping him with my hand as I capture his lips again, my chest on his. He' s so hard already, I don't know how long he'll be able to take this.
I blink as we flip again. Not long, apparently. He grabs my hand, guiding it underneath him and to his ass. He has such smooth skin. It's not fair. He's the monster, not me. Xel tells me to close my fingers except for one and I do so, before he leads me in a trail down his behind. We trace over his hole, then down along his skin, coming to...another hole? I blink at him, confused. He simply shrugs off my questioning face. "Mazoku are not forced into one gender or the other," he replies, slowly sliding up my body again. "Take me whichever way you want."
"This is your turn for pleasure. Which way is better for you?"
"Either way, I'll come."
Gods, what a decision. He's stroking me now, so this is going to have to be a quick choice. Maybe I'll just push in blindly. That might work. Then, wherever we are, we can begin. Yes, that'll work.
We flip one last time and I plunge my hips down against his, both of us hissing in sudden pleasure as we connect. His balls rub up against the top of me; I guess I chose the second hole my finger found. Xelloss repositions his legs so that he has better leverage for thrusting before I pull out slowly, then in again, starting our rhythm. I slip in and out of his warmth easily as he contracts around me from the inside. I'm already so close to climax, and as I look down, it appears he is as well. His arms reach around and grab my ass, making me pump harder, deeper, into him, swallowing me up to the hilt at every thrust now.
I didn't think he'd be this vocal of a lover. Of course, his mouth was full last night, but I still wasn't expecting him to be making all this noise. I like it, though. It lets me know that he really is enjoying this. Gods, this feels wonderful. And it's because of him. My lover, my...love? Yes, I couldn't be this passionate with someone I didn't love. I wonder if he loves me too. Ah well, my brain needs to shut up again. It finally does as we release in near unison, our cries echoing through the small, sparely furnished room. I collapse atop him into the dripping puddle of his seed, breathing heavily while I try to recover from the sudden rush of pure pleasure. I'm in so much bliss right now, I'm surprised he's not retching from all the positive emotion. But no, all he does is wrap his arms around my waist and hold me to him.
"Xelloss?"
"Yes, Zel-chan?"
"Why did you come to me?"
"Hmm...moments like this, I think."
"Moments like this?"
"Yes, when you're so wrapped up in what you're doing that nothing else matters. When life seems to stop for you, and time is an eternity you can live with. When you forget that stupid curse, the stupid fronts, and let your true fire come through. You only let that happen when you don't feel lonely, so I had to make sure you weren't."
"Boh."
"I remember what you used to look like." What?!? "I had to watch Rezo for a while before I met all of you. His work surrounding Zanafar was considered a bit of a problem to us, so I was assigned to make sure his little legacy didn't get used against Shabranigdo-sama. I remember seeing you on the few occasions he came to visit your family." My brain spins as it tries to wrap itself around all this. "You were so cute, Zel-chan!" he smiles brightly.
"So why didn't you show up when Eris was messing around with the legacy?"
"Well, that didn't have anything to do with Ruby Eye-sama, did it?"
"Well, no..."
"Then it wasn't under my orders, was it?" Literal translation of orders. How typically Xelloss.
"I suppose not." I look up at him, lifting my head off his chest. "So, you thought I was cute, huh?"
"I still think you're cute. In fact, you're damn sexy, my little stone boy." Isn't one supposed to flirt before all this happens? Well, it is nice to receive compliments instead of teasing for once. I curl up against him, kicking the covers over us with my foot.
"Hmm...I think it's time for sleep."
"Possibly."
"Stay tonight."
A pause. Oh gods, he has to think about this? Maybe he didn't really have business last night. Maybe he just wanted to leave because he hadn't gotten what he wanted. But then why would he have come back? Why -- "Why not?" he answers.
"Good," I smile.
...
"Were, were you there when he changed me?" Why am I asking this? I'm so tired now, I might fall asleep before I hear the answer.
"Yes. I was." Well, that changed his mood quickly. I probably shouldn't have said anything. Baka, Zel, you could've just fallen asleep happily for once, but noooo, you just had to ask, didn't you?
"You want to know if I know how he did it, don't you." I nod, eyes unfocused towards the door as he sighs. "But more importantly, you want to know if I know of a way to reverse it, ne?" I nod once more. He sits up, gathering me to his chest. Great, he's going to tell me no. Damn. Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn...
Xelloss rests his head on mine and...nods... He knows my cure? Hope dawns in my eyes as I look up at his face, catching the pained expression. I frown. "What's the catch?"
He shakes his head, smiling sardonically. "Only that you'll be human. Just a normal, mortal human. It's harder to keep you that way. You'll die sooner if you don't keep up the magic."
"Who says I wouldn't?"
"Who says you'll be able to?"
"I was never really big into magic before the change."
"And a lot of your abilities come from the other thirds of you."
"But potential means nothing against that."
"If you can still cast at all, your power level will drop drastically. I imagine you'll still be able to swing a sword, but I doubt you could still live off being a sorcerer."
"I can build my magic capabilities up again. And I have full confidence in my skills as a swordsman until I can fight as a mage once more."
He sighs. "You really want this, don't you."
"Of course I do! I've been looking for a cure since I was cursed. Please, Xelloss. Don't tell me you can do this if you won't." I can't believe he's torturing me with this. I'll bat at every chance for a cure I get like a cat at a string, and he knows it. How dare he toy with me like this?!?!
He looks at me with half-lidded amethyst eyes before cupping my face and smiling softly. "Don't worry, Zel-chan. Just get some sleep." He leans down and kisses me on the forehead. Get some sleep? How am I supposed to sleep when he's -- ZZZZZZZZZ
Nngh, it's bright. I blink my eyes before turning my head away from the window as the morning sun. My gaze catches sight of a sea of purple slightly above my head. He stayed. He stayed. I reach up to touch his face, a small smile gracing my lips, but my hand never gets there.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
O.O "What's wrong, Zel-chan?"
I shake my head in shock, still staring at my hand. My human hand. Oh gods, oh gods, oh gods, oh gods...
"The rest is like that too, you know. Or do you really like that hand?"
I finally look at him after convincing myself that if I stop looking, the flesh won't go away. My face cracks into a smile as I burst out laughing. When I run out of air, I grab Xelloss's face and kiss him for all he's worth, then plop down on top of him, a chant of "It's over" running through my lips. He simply smiles back and holds me, his hands running down my spine. I haven't felt this good in ages.
"Are you done screaming bloody murder now?" I nod to him, still beaming. "Good. I do have sensitive ears, you know. They can only take so much." Such a kidder. He could take a lot worse, and we both know it.
"How much longer can you stay?"
"Hmm...until I'm called back."
"Enough time for some fun?"
Oh, did I surprise you again? I guess so. "I would assume so"
"Well then, what's stopping us?" I reply, taking the initiative as the moans start up once more.
Things are going to be much better from now on.