Xellos watched the clock with some trepidation and realised that the class would be over in only five minutes. Only five minutes and then... then... what? He'd go have dinner with an absolutely gorgeous man who had been flirting with him and then, well, then nothing. Right? Right. Maybe. Oh man, he was never going to make it. The second they were left alone together he was going to have a panic attack and pass out, he was sure of it.
"Xellos?" A hand landed on his shoulder and he jumped before looking up to find Zelgadiss watching him with an amused expression. "Class is over, come on."
Xellos looked back at the clock and realised that he'd fretted away that last five minutes without noticing. "Oh, sorry. All right."
"So, where do you want to go to dinner?" Zelgadiss asked as they walked away from the Humanities building.
"I really don't care." Xellos responded weakly, and wondered if he'd even make it to whatever restaurant was chosen.
"All right then, let's just go somewhere close." The blue-eyed boy responded, guiding him to a cheerful place only a few blocks away. They were seated quickly as it was still rather early, and Xellos found himself glad to have a chair under him. This was simply insane, he shouldn't be this nervous!
"The next story was better, don't you think?" He asked, trying to start a conversation and hoping that schoolwork would keep it safe.
"It wasn't too bad, though I have to admit, I wasn't paying the least bit of attention to the lecture."
"You managed to ignore Professor Phil's enthusiastic rant?" Xellos teased and Zelgadiss responded with an easy smile.
"Well, I had something far more enjoyable to focus on."
Xellos found himself blushing and was very glad when the waiter arrived to save him. They place their orders and he looked around the restaurant, watching as it slowly filled with customers.
"You're far too nervous you know." Zelgadiss said with a sigh and Xellos looked back guiltily.
"It shows?"
"Like you're wearing a neon sign. You have that 'someone save me' look. If you don't like my company -- "
"No, that's not it!" He interrupted emphatically, and then broke off in embarrassment. "I mean, I just... I'm not used to this."
Zelgadiss' response was simply a questioning look and Xellos sighed.
"I haven't, I mean, I don't... I'm not good with people." He finally admitted. "I've spent too much time working on my own and basically ignoring everyone. This is... strange."
"And no one made an effort to get to know you?"
"Well, not persistently. It's not something that I encourage."
"You must get lonely."
He shrugged. "It doesn't matter."
"You're lying." Zelgadiss answered and Xellos looked up sharply. "To me and to yourself."
He looked away and the other boy sighed. "So, I suppose your mother didn't revoke your Realm access then."
"No." Xellos responded, accepting the change in subject gratefully. "Though I'm not sure she could manage if she did. I'm in the middle of an important project, and I wouldn't be able to finish it without that access."
"Oh really?" Zelgadiss asked with a frown. "How long have you been active in the Realm then?"
"Um... for a while." Xellos dodged, not wanting to admit the truth. Zelgadiss didn't need to know that he'd been playing in the Realm since before it was activated. "Like I said, I was handy. Have you really been there only for a year?"
"Yes. Before that my grandfather refused to allow the gear into the house. He's got some sort of prejudice against it. I think he's worried that people will begin to use it to replace their real lives."
"He's not too far off the mark." Xellos answered thoughtfully. "You'd be surprised how long people stay in there. Some of them can't be eating that much, they hardly ever leave."
"Really?" Zelgadiss asked with a frown. "Aren't there security protocols that prevent that?"
"Of course. But people can get around anything if they have the skill and put their minds to it. We try to change that but there's a few that can even get by me."
"You're that good?"
Xellos grinned. "Better."
"I wonder if I've ever met you in there." Zelgadiss mused and Xellos shrugged.
"Possibly. You never really know with the Realm."
"Shouldn't you be able to? I mean the appearance may change but the personality shouldn't."
"Oh really?" Xellos asked surprised. "Are you going to say that you're exactly the same inside the Realm as you are out here?"
"Well... maybe not EXACTLY the same."
"You're probably more different then you think, most people are. You get to play in the Realm. It's not reality, it's a fantasy. You can be everything you every wanted to be and there is no one who can take it away from you because no one knows the truth. That is why people like your grandfather are afraid, and rightly so. It's a great attraction, being able to live in a dream world."
"Maybe, but none of it's real."
"You say that like it's a bad thing."
"Isn't it?"
"That depends entirely upon your reality." Xellos answered with a smirk. "There are more than a few things in my life I could happily do without. Most people would say the same, and then there are more than enough who could do without the entire thing. That is where the trouble lies."
"I can't imagine it."
"Then you're lucky. I can imagine it all too easily." The food arrived then, cutting off whatever response Zelgadiss had to that. Xellos was relieved, he'd said more than he had wanted to. Before the other boy could resume the previous conversation he changed the subject again and forced Zelgadiss to talk about his grandfather's lab instead. They spent the rest of the evening on safer subjects and when they finally said goodnight Xellos found himself a little relieved. He did like spending time with Zelgadiss, but there was something about the other boy that scared him. Perhaps what frightened him the most was that 'thing' was his own reaction to Zelgadiss' company.