Yet another song fic, this one Possession by, you guessed it, Sarah McLachlan.
Listen as the wind blows
From across the great divide
Voices trapped in yearning
Memories trapped in time
Xellos sat high in an oak tree, concealed by the branches as he took in the view before him and lost himself in thought. The night around him was peaceful, a beautiful foil for the turmoil within. He had been facing this inner storm for so long that it almost failed to mean anything. Almost, but not quite. He sighed, hearing longing in the soft sound and frowned.
The night is my companion
And solitude my guide
Would I spend forever here
And not be satisfied
He focused on the quiet of the evening, trying to draw the solace into his soul, but the attempt failed. The uneasiness would not abate, the yearning would not leave him. It was almost intolerable, to feel need like this, so heavy that it might pull him from the tree he rested in.
And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
It was there though, and he was no longer able to deny it. As used to his solitude as he was, he was now faced with the need for another. That would have been fine, had it been restricted to a physical need, but he recognised the longing in his soul for deeper companionship.
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes dear
He wanted a lover in all senses of the word, and he wanted a very specific one. The sweet chimera would never let him close though, he knew this, and it added to his pain. That sorrow-filled heart, he longed to ease Zelgadiss' suffering, but accepted the fact that it would never be permitted. It hurt.
Through this world I've stumbled
So many times betrayed
Trying to find an honest word
To find the truth enslaved
Zelgadiss sat a few feet away from the tree in which Xellos perched, watching the mazoku through a break in the branches. The emotions that flickered across Xellos' face perplexed him, left him wondering who could cause the mazoku such pain and longing. He let himself briefly believe that it was him, but chased that thought away quickly. He was a joke to Xellos, just as he was to all the others, from the mazoku however, this caused him so much more pain.
Oh you speak to me in riddles
And you speak to me in rhymes
My body aches to breathe your breath
Your words keep me alive
He needed Xellos so much he was frequently forced to turn that desire into anger. Unable to believe anything the trickster said, Zelgadiss was unable to accept that the mazoku might even be remotely interested in him. And yet, being near him eased the pain in his soul even as it increased the frustration of his body. It would have been so much easier if this had been anyone but Xellos.
And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
But it was Xellos; the mysterious priest who guarded his secrets, the trickster who teased them all for his own amusement, and the lover Zelgadiss would never have. He closed his eyes against the sight of Xellos perched in the tree, to be this close was painful, but to be away would be worse.
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes dear
Why was he always denied what he wanted most? What karmic debt did he have to pay off that his life should be this full of disappointment and pain? He opened his eyes again just as moonlight flooded the branches of the tree, caressing Xellos with silver fingers. The image left Zelgadiss breathless and he could only stare at the mazoku in naked wonder.
Into this night I wander
It's morning that I dread
Another day of knowing of
The path I fear to tread
The night suited Xellos so well, especially now when his mask had been set aside. Zelgadiss could not face the morning having seen Xellos like this, could not face a repeat of the acts they both adopted to protect themselves. And yet, could he fight past the fear and open himself to the possibility of pain? The breath he had been holding finally released itself in a whispered sigh,
"Xellos."
Oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
Nothing stands between us here
And I won't be denied
A sound caught Xellos' attention and he looked down through the branches of the tree, only to be struck motionless by the beauty that met his eyes. Zelgadiss sat a few feet away from the tree, his back resting against a boulder, bathed in silver moolight. It was his eyes that drew the mazoku in however, those blue eyes that gazed at him with a need that echoed his own. Those eyes made up his mind and he left the tree, appearing before the speechless chimera.
And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
Neither moved for a long moment, and then, as one, Xellos knelt as Zelgadiss raised himself to his knees. Again they froze, watching as the moonlight played on each other's features, drinking in the moment and silently seeking permission.
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes dear
They found each other at the same time, need finally winning against disbelief, pulling them together just as a cloud covered the moon. Darkness hid the forest again, concealing the new lovers as their soft cries broke the still air.