And now.. submitted for the approval of the hentai out there...>XD A Five Minute Production of: Psuedo-yaoi! PLEASE NOTE! This is NOT intended as a fight or a slur or any of that other stoopid stuff. This was intended as a JOKE! Because I thought this would be FUNNY! :D And because I know of P-Chan's fascination with this pairing. ;)
A hot steamy outdoor bath. It had been a warm night, the kinda sultry, steamy, sticky night that either pisses you off or turns you on. There is no halfway point.
Two men are in the bath, oddly frozen and stilted in the uncrisping heat
"Gourry.." a low husky voice calls out in the night, the sensuality in his tone comPLETEly at odds with the frozen, terrified expression in his eyes-err..eye.
The addressed figure is struggling vigorously against his bonds, but, alas, even the Swordman of Light cannot outwit Duct tape. "Yes...Zel..?" Lovingly his beatiful lips shaped the name, stretching it out, drawing forth the previously unknown erotic subtleties in that one syllable. Even as his huge blue eyes filled with tears and he looked imploringly at a solitary figure wreathed in the mists. Messy dark hair and threatening glasses glare back
"Would.. would you..umm.. could I have one of your back rubs..? They just make me ...melt..." Every word was seduction as rocky features became marbilized rage. SOMEONE was going to PAY for this night's works, dammit!!! Honey dripped in the unwilling voice, and the invitation was accepted under exTREME duress. "Or course...my..." the sentence trailed off under the gagging of unwilling words and choking and frantic sounds of what MIGHT have been "ohgodNOi'mSTRAIGHtmakeherSTOP.." But I'm pretty sure it was just the water splashing.
"..My-mym-m-mmy-" a moment is taken out to beat some sense into someone. "MY..GAAAAAH! - LOVE!" A quiet sob in the night. The sounds of more thrashing, and then.. the lights dim. More mutters are heard, but they are soft and gentle despite their subject matter, so as not to invoke the monster that lurks under their bed. Yes. Bed.
Fear the fanfic writer, one murmurs, they are so very very evil. Yes, another whispers, they can take away your head or your life or your very sexuality.
Would that this had just been a death fic, the voice murmurs again, as both are offered up as beefcake for the yaoi mill.
Finally, the ficcer moves them into position.... Hentai surge in force, the promise of sex bringing out the evil chibi within.
Such sorrow! Twin voices in unison scream as one "BUT I DON'T WANNA DO YAOI!!!!"
Finis.
For YEW P-CHAN!! >XD
AGAIN! THIS IS A JOKE! NUTTIN' MORE!!! IF IT AIn'T FUNNY THEN I SOW-WEEEE!!!!!