Prologue


Somewhere, in the vastness of nonspace, Nothing was bored. We say nothing because this entity really is nothing, or rather everything and the absence thereof all at once, so really we're just being contradictory, but that's nice and chaotic-y and that's just what this reality is all about.

But for simplicity's sake (damn bitch) we'll call Nothing 'L-sama'.

Yes, the Golden Eyed Lord of Nightmares was bored. Verrry bored. Have you ever seen a Creator/goddess get bored? It ain't pretty.

So here the Golden One was, ranting and raving at Her non-minions, who were just a part of the darkness, so She was was really just yelling at Herself.

Frustrated, She plopped onto a non-couch, with no cherry coke and a bag of non-existent Cheetos to watch the tube. As fate or chance would have it, the first thing she saw...

We're me! Manly men! We're men in tights! finger snap Yesss!

Wide eyed, L-sama watched the green clad actors progress through a chorus line, battle a chastity belt and other o so amusing antics.

Yes, L-sama had succumbed to the silliness that is Robin Hood, Men in Tights.

And She wanted mooooooore, and She knew just were to get it.

With and evil smirk, she rushed over to one of the glowing balls floating in Her domain. This world in particular held Her Favorite as well as her amusing friends. Hmm... if you used him as Robin and him as Little John.. why yes, we have a whole world of actors right here!

"Isn't this a great idea?!" she crowed to her non-minions, who if you could see, would be copies of that little midget from Fantasy Island. De plane, boss, de plane!!

"Of course, boss! Of course!" the non existing midgets cheered.

Feeling quite giddy, L-sama giggled, chuckled, and finally crowed in happy expectation. "OH-HOHOHOHOHO!!"

Now that's disturbing.


Meanwhile, on earth, Lina had a baaaaad feeling, and a prickly sensation was racing up her neck. You see, as the Favorite, she had a bit o intuition on L-sama's moods -

So she knew they were in biiiiig trouble.

"Minna!" she panicked, looking over her shoulder for her friends. But it was too late, the world was already melting into gold and Lina was falling, for the ground no longer existed. "Oh, SHIIIiiii

    iiiiiiiii

    iiiiiiii - "

THUNK "Ow," Lina muttered, her head imbedded in the floor L-sama had so thoughtfully provided for her.

"Lina-chan, you shouldn't use such profanity!"

"Argh!" Lina jumped to her feet, aggravated. "What do YOU want?!"

"Just some fun! V^_^V I'm making a movie/reality, see?" L-sama grinned, holding up the manuscript for Lina's viewing pleasure.

"Garv Hood: Hot Guys in Tights?" Lina's eye twitched in irritation. "You can't be serious?"

"Oh, but I am," She chirped, handing Lina the script.

"Eh?!" The red head exclaimed, flipping through the pages. "I thought I was You're Favorite!"

"You are."

"So why aren't I in it?!"

"Ah, but I have a better job for you."

"...Why does that worry me?"

"You're going to make sure everything goes properly," L-sama congratulated, slapping Lina on the back.

"Wh-what?" she wheezed. "Oh god... u_u;"

"Yes?" blinkblink

"..." Sweatdrop "Never mind..." As she bemoaned her fate, a flash of blond caught her eyes. Not gold mind you, but BLOND, YELLOW even. "Milgasia? What're you doing here?"

And surely enough, there the Golden Dragon stood, clad only in boxers and a bowtie. "I wish I knew," he muttered, blushing.

"He's my Gopher!" L-sama cheered, causing the two non omniscient persons to sweatdrop.

"Now Lina-chan, it's time for you to get to work!" And with a wave of Her hand, the floor around Lina was no more and she was again falling.

"What? But I - OH SHIIIIII

    IIiiiiiiii

    iii

    iiiiiiiiii........."

After Lina's screams died out of hearing range, She turned to Mil and cupped Her cheek, contemplating the Dragon before her. "Now, what to have you do..." She mused.

Milgasia whimpered.

"I know!" She cried, snapping Her fingers. The floor once again appeared, with one shiny object laying near the Golden Dragon. "Pick up that quarter."

"Uh...ok." Mil bent over at the waist to retrieve the coin, but quickly found that it wouldn't budge. "It seems to be stuck."

But L-sama, watching Mil from behind, only smiled. "Keep trying."


Part 1   |   Fanfiction