Chapter 8: Mission Mechanical

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Steph: ::on the warpath and yelling:: OOPS THIS!!! ::Smack:: ::beats on Duo:: YOU'RE GONNA GET ME STUFF TO FIX THIS MESS AND YOU'RE GONNA DO IT NOW!!! NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!!! AND TAKE THAT WITH YOU!!!! ::points at Suboshi:: AND YOU BETTER BOTH COME BACK, OR ELSE!!!!

Duo and Suboshi make tracks before Steph really loses it. Steph slams a nonexistent door behind them.

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Later ... as their walking through some streets (Gessner, maybe).

Suboshi: This is all your fault!

Duo: My fault!?

Suboshi: Yeah! If you hadn't started all this, we wouldn't be in trouble, and Steph wouldn't be out for our blood.

Duo: Look Yo-Yo Boy --

Suboshi: -- Don't call me that! My name is Suboshi, you jerk! An this is your fault. You used me as bait, you rigged the Temple, and you gave me the cake that goes boom! Are you suicidal or something!?

Duo: ::with extreme patience:: No. That's Heero. Besides, you helped.

Suboshi: I ... I ... I ... darnit. Hentai.

Duo: Jerk.

Suboshi: Loser.

Duo: Brat.

Suboshi: Wannabe.

Duo: Shut up.

Suboshi: Same to you.

They both shut up. Then they head straight for the nearest money machine. Correction: Duo heads straight for it and Suboshi just kinda follows him. It's an ATM machine to be precise. Duo flicks his wrist and holds up a ATM card between two fingers with a smile while Suboshi just looks at the chunk of metal before him and wonders what all the to do is about. He does not fail to see the card trick, however, and can't help but be impressed, though he hides it well. Duo sticks the card into the machine, pushes a few buttons, and tada, out pops some cash. That gets Suboshi attention and now he wants to play too.

Suboshi: Let me try!

Duo shrugs and moves out of the way. Suboshi pushes card into machine. Machine beeps. Suboshi pushes a few buttons at random. Machine glows funny read color as steam comes out. Suboshi doesn't notice and pushes more random buttons. Little snake-like coils shoot out of machine and grab at Suboshi. Suboshi attaches himself to Duo's head.

Suboshi: AAAAHHHH!!! IT'S TRYING TO EAT MY KIDNEYS!!!!

Duo: No! It's gonna blow! Duck and Cover!!!

They manage to dive out of the way before the ATM machine goes nova, raining cash into the air.

Duo: Well, that's one way to get some quick cash.

Cash card smacks Suboshi on the head and bounces off. Duo picks it up and puts it away.

Duo: Let's go.

Suboshi: But ...

Duo: Trust me, we do not want to be here when the cops get here.

The book out of there (under Duo's prodding) at warp velocity. Then they cross the street. Correction: Duo waits for the cars to pass, Suboshi walks straight into traffic. For someone who lives with the computer-happy-Steph and the oh-so-mechanical-Duo, he sure is naive. He steps off the curb and almost gets run over by a truck. Duo's quick, though (and he remembers Steph's ultimatum), and pushes Suboshi out of the way. Suboshi's stunned for a few seconds, before getting this look on his face (kinda downright starry).

Suboshi: ::dazed:: You saved my life.

Duo: ::puzzled, draws out words expectantly:: Yeeessss.

Duo kinda edges away, worried, after all, Suboshi's acting pretty weird here and out of character. Good thing he's prepared, too, 'cause Suboshi suddenly latches onto him.

Suboshi: ::kind of like a happy Wacko off of Animainacs:: Thanks!

Duo: Ack! Let go off me!

Suboshi looks a might puzzled but lets go. Then he looks at Duo's still ruined hair and blushes. He's snaps his fingers, returning it to original and proper state.

Suboshi: Sorry about all those tricks I played on you.

Now Duo's the one who's dazed.

Duo: Ummmm ... Thanks. I ... guess I'm sorry too, I'll try to fix it for you when we get back to the Temple. If we get back to it alive, that is.

Suboshi nods. Duo nods. They both look really embarrassed.

Suboshi: So .... ummmm ... let's go!

Duo: Yeah!

They hit the local Home Depot like two miniature tornadoes, whip through the aisles, grab stuff that looks useful and/or interesting off the shelves, shout ideas and comments to each other, and race to the checkout counter at warp speed, leaving stunned shoppers and employees alike in their wake.

Duo: Got the paint!

Suboshi: Got the spackle!

Duo: Do you think this wallpaper is too mecha?

The paper in question has gundams all over it that look vaguely like Shinigami.

Suboshi: Nah. Not for your room.

Checker Lady: Will that be cash, check, or credit card?

Suboshi: ::to Duo:: Ummmmm ... cash?

Duo: Credit card!

Duo hands the credit card to the checker lady. Suboshi becomes way too entranced by the cool looking checkout machine and leans over the counter to mess with it. Bad move, Suboshi (didn't you learn anything from the ATM machine?). Obviously not, because he starts pushing buttons at random again. And again the machine in question goes nova.

Duo: You and machine just do not mix!

Suboshi ignores him and points over Duo's shoulder.

Suboshi: Ummmm...

Duo looks where Suboshi is pointing.

Duo: I think we better leave.

Suboshi: Yes.

Duo and Suboshi, the human whirlwinds, are suddenly running for their lives (with semi-purchased stuff in hand), as they're chased out of the store by angry two-by-four carrying Home Depot employees. They book at light speed for the suddenly less dangerous confines of the Temple, where a now cooled off Steph is trying to fix some of their damage.

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