"What is Love?" I ask, sitting by the fireside one night. My closest companions are with me; Lina, Gourry, Amelia, Xellos... Well, maybe not Xellos. Each, in turn, looks up at me in confusion. I can just imagine what they see; cold, indifferent Zelgadis, leaning against a tree, in contemplation of what is supposedly the greatest force known to man. Aside from Lina's appetite, that is. I realize how silly this must sound. I mean, isn't everyone supposed to know what Love is?
"What do you mean, Zelgadis-san?" Amelia gives me this wide-eyed, curious and concerned look. "Everyone knows what Love is!"
See? Everyone but I knows what Love is. Damn inherent want of knowledge.
"Then what is it?" I ask again. Over there, in the darkness, Xellos is smiling again. Not that fruity, placented smile, it's that thrice-damned "I-Know-Everything-You-Wish-You-Knew" smile. The dark one. The evil one.
"I think I understand what Zelgadis is asking." He steps forward, and I glare at him. What would a Mazoku know of Love?
...Actually, now that I think of it, he's probably got a better grasp of it than we do. He is immortal, after all. And supposedly, Love is his enemy, and he always struck me as the 'know-thy-enemy' type. I just know he'll give some wise-ass crack about it being a secret, though.
"Well, do enlighten me." I prompt him, but my glare hopefully tells him not to try anything stupid.
"Sore wa himitsu desu!" He snickers, then disappears again. Somehow, I saw that one coming a mile away.
"Damn fruitcake." Lina mutters. "So, Zel, what brought about this round of insightful conversation?"
"I... don't know." Damn it! That was intelligent, Zelgadis. I pick up a small rock from the forest floor and begin to play with it absently, rolling it around in my hand and between my fingers; a little trick I picked up from my oh-so-wonderful grandfather.
"Poor Zelgadis-san!" Amelia jumps to her feet, launching into another one of her Ceipheed-forsaken speeches. "True Love is pure and just feelings for another person, it is the burning heart of - thump!"
"Sit down, Amelia." Lina whacks the princess with her bunny slipper. Thank Ceipheed. I couldn't stomach one of her speeches this close to bedtime.
"But, Lina-san - thump!" The other slipper followed suit.
"I said sit down!" My red-headed companion has saved me yet again.
"Isn't Love that thing where you want to be with another person and make children?" Gourry offers, slightly confused. Hmph. That makes two of us.
"Wanting to be with another person is attraction..." I cast my gaze into the fire. "But... it's all physical! How can you tell if you're really in Love with someone, or if you're only in lust?"
Lina's giving me a scrutinizing look. I wonder what she's thinking...
"Lina?" I'll let her present her views. Lina knows these kinds of things, right? At least she won't give me some stupid crack about it being a secret.
"Love is..." She pauses, as if trying to find the right words. Wait, what if she doesn't know?
"Go on." I prompt. I am intrigued by what she has to say.
"Love is something... some one that you could devote your life to." She answers at last. "Not devote as in becoming their slave, I mean like making them happy, because it makes you happy. Not for any real personal gain. Just to be with them... It's this tingling notion, right behind the ears... ah, hell, I don't really know how to explain either!" She throws up her hands in disgust, shaking her head.
"Oh." I'm more than a little disappointed, but I don't let it show. Well, so much for that idea.
"It's not wanting to die for someone." Lina gets this glazed over tint to her eyes... she's staring right through me! "It's wanting to live for them.To give them hope when they need it. To keep their feet on the ground but their head in the clouds. To be everything they need, even if they don't want it, even if it means that it hurts. It's wanting them to be happy, even if it's not with you. Doing everything in your power to help them, but not doing it for them. Complimenting them perfectly, balancing them. You know you're in love because you can't bear to see them unhappy, because that makes your heart hurt too. And you want nothing more than to ease their pain and wipe away their tears..."
"Ah." I whisper. Now I know. "So that is what Love is."
"Lina-san, that was beautiful!" Amelia gushes, snapping my friend from her trance-like state.
"Very." Gourry agrees, but his gaze is distant too. I think he's thinking of Sylphiel...
I turn, and meet Lina's red eyes. Her eyes are very vibrant tonight.
"Now I know." I smile slightly, thanking her for sharing her knowledge. "Now I know."