Dragonball vs Slayers


Author's Note

Like the title says... this is a Dragonball & Slayers Crossover... It's set during the time the Dragonball fighters were battling cell... in manga 34/35 (?). (shrugs her shoulders) I can't remember...


Prologue

Lina: HOLD IT!!! What are you trying to say?

Xelloss: Just act it out. No big deal.

Lina: Whaddya mean NO Big deal!! I'm playing a guy!!!!!

Gourry: Well.. you could pass up as a guy with your flat che-

Lina Dill Brando Gourry through the sky.

Lina: Why can't I play a woman's part?!!!! (mumbling) Mazoku no baka.. idiot....a$&%@!!.

Xelloss: Ne, Lina, flattery won't get you anywhere.

Zelgadiss: (coming out from the changing room) Um... I don't think I look good in spandex...

Xelloss: Oh, but I think you do look good....

Zelgadiss: Don't go there....

Xelloss: Hey, people!! Get your butts over here and work on my Zelgadiss's hair!!

Amelia: Your Zelgadiss? OH, my.....(tears welled up)

Lina: Your Zelgadiss?

Zelgadiss: I'M NOT HIS!!!! HE'S JUST A -mmmprfhsg (people started crowding him to work on his hair)

Xelloss: Okay... let's review this again... Lina you be Goku...

Lina: Xelloss.........................

Xelloss: Hey.. you both have much in common..

Lina: In case you haven't notice, he's a guy, I'm a girl!!! He's a brunette, I'm a red head!!!

Xelloss: But you both have big appetite!

Lina: Xelloss..........

Xelloss: And my- I mean.. Zelgadiss is Vegeta.. because well.... He's suitable for that part.. and....I'd like to see him in spandex.

Zelgadiss: I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (yelling at the make up people) What the hell are you doing with my hair?!!

Xelloss: Amelia is Gohan.

Amelia: WHAT?!!! OH, great!! Now I'm Lina's son!! SON!!! Why must I play the guy's part!!!! Can't I get Pan or Videl?..

Lina: Live with it.

Xelloss: Pan isn't born yet, and Gohan haven't met Videl, yet!! Next!! Firia is.. Juuhachi-gou!

Firia: Are you saying that I have to act really grouchy and cut my hair?

Xelloss: Well... yes...

Firia: Not in your lifetime, bud. (started going out the door)

Xelloss: YOU have to go through with this, .... Babe. (glares)

Firia: (stomping back to the studio) namagomi.....mumble..grumble...mumble...

Xelloss: And playing the villain, Cell... is .. Martina!!!

Martina: Nani???!!!! I'm the villain?? Can't I have the good guy part? Kudasai!!

Xelloss: Let me check...um.....NO!!!

Martina: Why must I play Cell?! He's green and hideous!!

Xelloss: Exactly.

Martina: Well... Lina's almost pink yet she isn't playing Buu!!!

Lina: Let's not even go there.....

Martina: Amelia's short and yet she isn't playing Freeza!!!

Amelia: Don't start with me, Martina...

Xelloss: Martina... (gazing into her eyes) Play the part!

Martina: Xelloss.....(hearts formed in her eyes)

Xelloss: I guess that settles it....Valgarv is.......Piccoro!!!

Valgarv: WHAT?!!! In case you haven't notice.. I'm not an alien!!!

Xelloss: So? You're green anyway.... And you aren't human....

Valgarv: I could skin you alive.....

Xelloss: Er... that's true... but... uh....um....

Valgarv: HAND ME THE SCRIPT!!!!!

Xelloss reluctantly hand the ryuzoku the script.

Valgarv: Ha..ha.... Now I'm the director! Let's see...Mirai Trunks is Gourry?

Gourry: (came running) Yes?

Valgarv: The script requires you to play Mirai Trunks .

Gourry: It did? Oh, wow!

Lina: Why must he play the kawaii 'est' part?!!!

Amelia: Ne, Lina you're the hero.

Lina: So? Ha..ha.. I guess it is.....

Xelloss: What part shall I play?

Valgarv: (Yawning..)... You play.....(evil glint in his eyes) Kuririn! Muahahaha!!! You have to shave your hair and be really short!!! Hahahahaha!!!

Xelloss: (looking at his fingernails) Hmm.. so it's true... but I also have to make time with Firia....

Valgarv: NANI?!!! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!!! (flipping the script page by page) Chikuso..... it's true....Well.. then you play.......Bulma.

Xelloss: But she only appears towards the end. (whining) Can't I play the one with the fighting parts?

Valgarv: But....Bulma is also the wife to Vegeta aka Zelgadiss.....

Xelloss: Hai! Hai!! I'll take it!!

Zelgadiss: MAZOKU NO BAKA!!!!! RYUZOKU NO BAKA!!!!!!!! (yelling at the stylist) What are you doing with my hair now?!!!

Xelloss: I may even reward you... (winking)

Valgarv: Uh...... NO...thanks..... (thinking) ... Rezo is.. Ten Shin Han!!!

Rezo: What the- How can I act if I can't even see!!! And for you info, Then Shin Han's bald!!!

Valgarv: That's why we're giving you an extra eye, compliment of Valgarv's Production. And you just shave your head.. no biggie....

Rezo: What?!!! I'll get you for this........

Gourry: So who's Piccoro now?

Valgarv: Hey, I know....(snapped his fingers) Come on forward... Naga!!!

Naga: Hahahaha..... what do you want from me, the enchanting sorceress!!!

Valgarv: You play Piccoro.

Naga: I don't play any alien part!! Why don't YOU play it?

Valgarv: Because I'm the director!

Naga: No way!!

Valgarv: You are going to play it or I'll blast you off to another place!!!!

Naga: Yes, sir!! Valgarv-san!

Valgarv: That solves my problem... Except... who's going to play Kuririn?

A voice: Hand over that blasted script, Dragon boy!!!

Valgarv: (turned) How dare you....Ooops....

Goku: Ha..ha..ha.. So, you think you can be the director, ne? I'm the director now!!!

Valgarv: What makes you think-

Vegeta came out behind Goku, and Mirai Trunks, and Gohan, and Goten, and Piccoro, and Kuririn, and Trunks , and Cell, and Freeza, and Buu, and Juunanagou, and Juuhachigou and Bulma, and Chi Chi, and Pan, and Marron, and Mr. Satan, and Videl, and Kamesenin, and Ten Shin Han, and Yamucha, and Danda, and Yajirobel, and Kaiou sama, and Kaiou Shin and Kibito and Dabura and Uub and the dog, and Shen Long, and the gorilla, and Taurus, and Zarbon and, Taipen, and the whole Jinzouningen crew and The whole Nameckian crew, and-

Valgarv: STOP IT! Don't you think you've had enough of supporters behind you?! Okay! Okay! I'll surrender!

Goku grabs the script from Valgarv's hands and sat on the director's chair

Goku: Let's see..... Valgarv! You play Kuririn!!!!

Valgarv & Kuririn: What?!!!

Firia: Valgarv!!!

Valgarv: Okay, I'll be Kuririn.. the new and improved version!! (holding up a 'V' sign)

Amelia: Hey! That was suppose to be my sign!

Kuririn (to Valgarv): Are you implying something?

Lina: This is going to be a loooooooong day.

Zelgadiss: Help!!! I can't take this anymore!!!!!!!!!! (surrounded by make up artists)


Part 1: Serious VS Serious.....

Goku: The battle between Cell Martina and Amelia-han, had began. Amelia-han already destroyed the Cell Martina juniors, and has transformed into SSJ 2!

Lina: I thought I was the hero!!!

Goku: Be patient!

Amelia: (putting on a blond wig)

Focus... on Valririn and Gourunks..

Valgarv: How did you get the magic beans?

Gourry: Uh....I can't remember...

Valgarv: (rolling his eyes)

Focus... on Cell Martina and Amelia-han...

Martina: I can beat you.. you...$&%@#!!! Don't think you can beat me!!

Amelia: By the code of Justice!!! I can beat you!!! Evil doer!!!! Don't you care about the suffering people of the world?!!! I am here to do mankind Justice!!!

Martins: It's no use, midget!! I am stronger!!!! (transform)

Amelia: It's no use.. you ugly Cell!!!

Cell (from behind the scene): Hey! Who are you calling ugly!!! #%&$!!!

Amelia-han and Cell Martina in a fighting situation...

Martina: Zoamel Gustav!!!!

Amelia: Elmekia Lance!!!

Goku: Hold it!!! You were suppose to fight!! You know.. Punch! Whack! Bonk! That stuff.

Amelia: But.. we normally use our power!!!

Goku: No.

Amelia: But.. but...

Goku: Stop blabbering.. just go on with it....OH, alright.... The next scene is not suitable for people who are devoted to peace... since we all are.... here's an entertaining commercial for you peace lovers.....

Focus on... Zelgadiss surrounded by make up artists.

Zelgadiss: What are you doing with my hair!!! Haven't you have enough!!!! (squirming out of his seat)

Make up artist 1: Honey, I can't make you look like this when you're going to act..

Zelgadiss: (grumbling) Try me...

Make up artist 2: Girl.. If you don't look good,

All make up artists: We don't look good.

Focus back on the fighting scene.

Martina: Aah... all of my attacks are useless... how can that be?

Amelia: Ha..ha.. Evil Martina! I shall serve mankind, justice!!!

Martina: I'm not through with you yet, midget! KA......ME....HAME....

Amelia: KA....MEHAME

Martina & Amelia: ....HA!!!!

Goku: Two great big fire balls crashed into each other making a great ...force..... which.blows.... everybody.... Away.....even.....me........aarrgghh.....(holding on to a chair)

Martina: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! My hand!!!! I lost my hand!!!!! And I lost both of my feet!!!! I'm a walking nightmare!!!!!!

Lina: Aren't you always...

Martina: Why.. why... is she stronger........

Zelgadiss: Her fireball is much stronger than Cell Martina's......

Amelia: Really, Zelgadiss-kun?!!!

Goku: No romance stuffs, folks! We're working here!!!

Amelia: Darn it,

Lina: What are you doing, Amelia-han!! Kill that evil, ugly, annoying, blabbering, shrieking, horrofying-

Goku: Can we please stick to the script?!

Lina: Amelia-han! Kill her quickly!!!!

Amelia: No way, I want to have fun with her first. Let her know the suffering of the unjustice people of the world!!!!

Lina: What the hell are you saying?!! Just kill that $&$&@#!!!

Naga: She's gone nuts.

Lina: You'd better kill her quick before she do much more injustice to us!!!! I mean.. you'd better kill her quick before she gets desperate!!! You don't know what she'll do next!!!

Goku: Martina ressurects herself. He arms and legs popped out from her overblown body.

Martina: I'm normal again!!!!! I mean.... I shall not be beaten by you mere mortals!!!!

Goku: Whoops... another excessive voilence. To the commercial folks!

Focus on... Xelloss...

Xelloss: Gotta look my very best for my 'husband'.. la..la..la..

Zelgadiss: I'm not your bloody husband !! You gay!!! EICHI!!!

Xelloss: Of course you are my husband.....It says so in the script....Get ready for the big lemon scene....

Zelgadiss: We'll be 7 miles away from each other!!!! There's no lemon scenes, hentai!!!!

Xelloss: No lemon parts?... aww... and I was looking forward to it....

Focus back on Cell Martina and Amelia-han.....

Gourry: Too much on energy will slowen their speed after transforming.... Cell Martina had shown me before.. now even she's doing it!!!.......Hey! I remembered my lines!!

Lina : (sarcastically) Oh, wow. When will I get the hero part?

Goku: Amelis-han kicked Cell Martina right on her blasted face. Cell Martina groaned. And she puke out Firia-gou.

Firia: (lying on the ground) I'm covered with her Saliva!!! Eww!!!

Valgarv: That's Firia-gou! She puked out Firia-gou! (whispering to Goku) Do I have to kiss her? Because I don't want to kiss her with all that saliva.....

Gourry: She's not the perfect Cell Martina anymore! Hey.. since when she was perfect?

Amelia: Sheesh.. How am I suupose to fight with you? It'll bring my dignity to a lower level as I have to fight you.

Goku: Martina suddenly started to bloat and she's getting fatter and fatter....

Martina: Waah!!! All my money on the gym membership and the slimming pills.. Wasted!!!

Goku: People!!! Stick to the script!!! (holding a megaphone)

Martina: You ignorant people!! I'll blow myself up in exactly one minute!!!! Don't' you dare attack me or I'll burst out!!!! Killing the whole world, including you!!!

Lina: I'll promise myself not to eat THAT much, anymore...

Naga: It's over......Ha..ha..ha..ha..ha..ha...

Valgarv: ............

Rezo: ............

Martina: 20 seconds left!!!

Amelia: It's all my fault! If I had killed him sooner..... I should've listen to you, Lina.....I'm such an ignorat, selfish, brat,

Zelgadiss: spoiled

Amelia: ...spoiled...

Zelgadiss: midget,

Amelia: ...midget...Hey!

Gourry: 10 seconds left....

Lina: Whatever the options.. I still think there's only one way to solve this..... Yay!! Now I'm the hero!!! (turned to look at her fellow friends)

Gourry: Lina-ku?

Rezo, Nahga, Gourry: Huh?!

Lina: Good bye... my friends..(teleporting herself to Amelia-han).. Sugoi!! I can teleport!!

Martina: Ha..ha...There's 4 second left!!

Lina: (appeared before Amelia-han)... Amelia-han.. your performance was very good.... huh? Apologize to Chi Chi for..me..? Whaddya mean by this!!! Does this mean that I'm..going to die?!! What kind of hero is this?!!

Goku: Just go on with the show...

Lina: (mumbles and grumbles).... Ja ne..... (teleports herself and Cell Martina away)

KABOOM!!!!!


Part 2

Ameli-han: OTUUSAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Valgarv: Everything's over.... It's fine now.....

Amelia-han: It's all my fault!!! Waahhh!! If I had listened.......None of this would ever happen!!!!

Zelgadiss: It sure was your fault... Hey!! Now that's it's over, can I get out from this spandex?!! It itches!! I think I'm getting rash all over!!

Goku: Don't be that certain, stone boy. Cell Martina's alive and well because being hard headed she is, her head didn't get blown away. Instead it grew into the perfet Cell Martina!! Muahahahaha!!!! Lina-ku was at the afterlife with Kaiou sama!!

Lina's voice: WHAT!!! YOU MEAN I KILLED MYSELF FOR NOTHING!!!!!! #%^@&&$%$^!!@$$#%@!!

Focus.. on the people on earth

Zelgadiss: Hey, can't we just kill Firia-gou..

Valgarv was cradling Firia in his arms.

Valgarv: No. She wasn't that evil compared to Martina...

Rezo: And that's the truth...

Martina: What did you say about me?!!!

Martina releases a red beam and it went through Gourunks..

Gourry: ITEE........................................I'm dying............I'm dying.....

Marchina: Mua ha ha ha ha ha! I'm back!!!

Amelia: Hahaha!! Now that you're back I can beat you with my own two hands and avenge the death of Lina-ku!!! By the code of justice, I shall never let you live!!!!!

Zelgadiss: Oh, man... I don't have to say this... do I?

Goku: Yes, stone boy.

Zelgadiss: (inhale) Gourunks... Gourunks.... Gourunks!!!!!!!! Chikuso....

Zegadiss lunged forward and began attacking Cell Martina.

Zelgadiss: Diem Wind!!! Dug Haut!!! Ra Tilt!!!!

Which only causes smokes and dust

Martina: (appeared in front of Zelgadiss) This will teach you not to mees up my facial! Hiyargh! (knocks Zel to the ground) Die, Zel-geta! Muahahahaha!! But then.. again... you're cute.

Zelgadiss: Don't even think of going out with me!

Martina: Then... DIE, ZELGADISS!!!!! I mean.... DIE ZEL-GETA!!!!!!!!

Goku: Cell Martina release a Zoamel Gustav (?) towards Zelgadiss who can barely get up.

Amelia: Oh, Zelgadiss!!! (She lunged to protect the injured Zelgadiss)

BOOM!!!!

Amelia: AAHH!!!! My left hand is not functioning!!!!! All because of him!!!

Zelgadiss: Gee, thanks Amelia.....I've been such a burden to you.....

Amelia: Zelgadiss......By justice I'll defend you!! Only... I don't think I'm able too... (crying) I'm sorry, Lina-ku... I've failed you.....

Naga: Hahahaha..... Shimatta... we're all doomed.. hahahaha...

Goku: Can you please not laugh? You're in a midde of a death defying situation here!

Martina: I've gathered enough energy to destroy the whole world! Ha ha ha!! Try and stop me now!!!!

Amelia: Just go ahead and do what you want to do. I don't care anymore...

Lina's voice: Amelia!!! You @#!%^#@^#%!!! What happened to your code of Justice?! Why the hell did you F****** give up F******** fast?!!!

Amelia: Lina???

Lina: Yes , it's me.. your loving Lina-ku!!! Let's join forces to beat this evil Martina!!!

Martina: KA....ME....HA....ME....HA!!!!

Lina: Dragu Slave!!!!

Amelia: KA..MEHAME..HA!!!

Goku: Lina channels her Dragu Slave and tried to join it up with the kamehameha to blow off this Cell Martina.

BOOM!!!!

The earth shattered. Almost everyone was blown away. Both parties are trying very hard to blow the opposite party off.

Martina: Prepare to die, Justice girl!!!!!!!!!

Zelgadiss: Ra tilt!!

Martina jumped out of the way of the Ra tilt but got caught up in the Dragu Kamehameha Slave..

Martina: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M DYING...!! I'M DYING...I'm Dying!!!!!!!!!....help..... I'm dying!!!!!!!.....I'm-

Goku: Kamehameha!! (a fireball shoot across Martina blowing her off to a far away place) She can't even die in peace.. Okay.. people..!! concentrate on the scene on Karin's tower!!!

Firia: (opening her eyes)

Valgarv: You're at the Karin's tower. There's nothing more to be afraid of.. Cell Martina is destroyed by Amelia-han...

Amelia: Victory!!! (holing up a 'V' sign)

Firia: Really?

Naga: Ha..ha..ha..ha....you should be thanking Valririn. He's been protecting you ever since you were puked out by Cell Martina....Ha..ha..ha..ha..ha...

Amelia: I know!! Valririn likes Firia-gou!!

BONK!!!

Amelia: Itee....(rubbing her head)

Valgarv: YOU BLABBERMOUTH!!!!

Firia: Humph... Don't dream.. dragon boy!! (changes into her dragon form and flew away)

Amelia: Aww... don't worry Valririn.. you still have friends like us!!!

Valgarv: That's what I'm afraid of......

Naga: Let's worry about that later.. ha..ha..ha..ha.. Now I summon thee the Dragon!!!!

Gaav: What?!! I'm the Holy Dragon?!!!

Valgarv: Cool!

Naga: Bring all the ones who had been killed by Cell Martina alive!!! Ha..ha..ha..ha..

Gourry: OH, boy!! I'm alive... I'm alive.....

Amelia: But there's no Lina.... Oh.. Holy Gaav Dragon.... Can't you bring Lina back to life?

Gaav: I could.. but I won't!!!

Goku: STICK TO THE SCRIPTS!!!!!!

Gaav: Sheesh.....NO... because Lina's been dead twice.. so it's impossible to bring her back to life..

Amelia: Some holy Dragon......

Lina's Voice: Hey! Don't worry about me!! I'm fine here in the afterlife!!! There's loads of food!!! And Kaiou sama is being very genourous about it!!! And loads of gold!!!

Gourry: Why did you wish me back to life?!!!! Take me with you Lina!!!!

Lina's voice: I'm very touched by you guys wanting to bring me back to life.. but.. hey! I'M HAPPY HERE!! Amelia-han is stronger than me, now..... WHAT?!!! THAT'S NOT TRUE!!!!!

Goku casts a threating glare at Lina.....

Lina's voice: Okay..okay.... Ja ne!!!

Gaav: Aww... that is soooo touching... But do any of you care about the second wish?!!! Noooo!!

Valgarv: Can Firia-gou be a normal human?!!!

Firia: What??? (behind a pillar)

Gaav: NO... I can't because she's barf much barf more barf powerful than barf me....

Valgarv: So.. can you just take away the bomb planted in her body?

Firia: (Walking towards Goku) I have a bomb in my body?!!!! I could blow up any minute!!!!!

Goku: Your loved one just wished it off... now go back behind the pillar....

Gourry: Valririn... why did you wished that?

Valgarv: Sigh........ I feel sorry for them.....

Firia: (behind the pillar) I don't need your sorry 'ness' !!!!!!!!!!!!! That's it I'm leaving!!!! (flies away)

Goku: Hey!! You can't go now!!!!!!!! Come back here!!!!

Valgarv: Don't talk to her that way!!!!

Xelloss: When's my part going to come?!!!!!

Zelgadiss: Let's hope... NEVER!!!!

Lina's voice: NOW, can I get back in the scene and be the hero!!!!!!!!!

Amelia: You're dead, Lina!!!

Gourry: I don't think I look good in purple hair....

Goku: WILL YOU LOADS SHUT UP?!!! YOU'RE RUINING MY ENTIRE PRODUCTION HERE!!!! GET THE @#^%$@#^$ BACK TO WORK!!!!!!

Zelgadiss: How dare you speak to us that way.....

Amelia: Yeah!!!

Lina: I could Dragu Slave you alive!!!! (coming out from the heavens)

Goku: Now... let's be reasonable, people.........

Xelloss: It all your fault that I don't have any scene with Zel.........

Firia: He actually put a bomb inside me!!!!!!!!

Valgarv: You won't get away with this..............

Naga: Ha..ha..ha... let's get him!!!!

Rezo: On wards!!!

Martina's voice: It's all your fault that I'm stuck here at the planet Pluto!!!!

Goku: Guys...... maybe I'm too hasty..... but....

Lina: GET HIM!!!!!!

Vegeta: Fireball!!!!! (the fireball lunged towards the Slayers group)

Lina, Amelia, & Zel: Valis Wall!!! (creates a protective shield around them)

Goku: Kamehameha!!!

Lina: Dragu Slave!!!!!

Kuririn: Kienzan!!!!!!!

Amelia: Visufranku!!!!!!!!!!

Mirai Trunks : Fireball!!!!!

Valgarv: (sends a red beam towards Dragonball group)

Piccoro: (sends a red beam towards Slayers group)

Martina: Zoamel Gustav!!!!

Gohan: Kamakameha!!!!!

Naga: Freeze Arrow!!!!!

Goten: Fireball!!!!!!!!!!!!! (again)

Zelgadiss: Ra Tilt!!!!!!!!!!!!

Juuhachigou: (sends a fireball)

Firia: Dragon Power !!!!!(sends a bright yellow fireball) (is there such thing?)

Cell: Kamehameha!!!!!!!!

A voice: STOP IT!!!! I'M IN CHARGE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM THE DIRECTOR!!!!!

All turned.....

Goku: Oh, no.....it's.. him!!!

Lina: Man... even I must bow to his greatness.....

The voice: Ha..ha..ha.. I guess you do...... For I'm WINNIE THE POOH

Zelgadiss & Vegeta: Pooh....(sarcastically)

Pooh: Tigger.. take care of him!!!

Tigger bounced up and down and knocked Zelgadiss and Vegeta to who knows where.

Zelgadiss & Vegeta: Aaaarrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!

Pooh: Anyone else wants to object?

All: No... sir..... (bowing)

Pooh: Great!!! I'm making ' Winnie the Pooh.. the movie' !!!! Muahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!


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