Disclaimer: I don't own the any of these characters.
Surgeon's General Warning: The following story contain several blatantly mushy Xelloss and Filia scenes. Exercise caution if weddings are known to give you cavities. Beware of Zelgadis/Amelia, and Lina/Gourry hints. In addition there is a great deal of silliness, and general attempts at bad humor. Author takes no liability for nausea or for harmful laughter caused by the reading of this story. Continue at your own risk...
I started writing this fanfiction because I really didn't want to study for Organic Chemistry one day, and I began wondering what would happen if Xelloss and Filia got married. This is my first fanfiction and I need help, so please send comments. Suggestions, corrections, and criticisms are welcome! Please send comments to: elffromspace@yahoo.com
Thanks to Abby (DragonGirl17) and Chuck for proofreading, and to Chibi Ophelia and Zelas_ar for suggestions. Thanks to Li-chan for inspiring the Warning.
"Wow, Lina, I thought we'd never find an ice-cream parlor. It sure took a long time. But it was worth it."
"Yeah, this triple fudge swirl, strawberry chunk super-cone is the best! I wonder what the others are up to?"
Lina and Gourry returned triumphantly from their hunt, happily licking ice-cream cones. They were about to enter the inn where their party was staying when they were startled by the sound of a large crash.
"What now?" Lina exclaimed as they were almost knocked over by a fleeing townsman. Cautiously, they entered to find the common room strangely deserted. Only Zelgadis and Amelia remained, warily watching Filia systematically destroy everything in her way to get to Xelloss.
Amelia nervously turned from the wreckage to greet them, and her eyes lit up seeing the ice-cream. "Oh, so you found an ice-cream parlor? Zelgadis-san, let's go get some, too?" She latched onto Zel and tried to drag him off while keeping an eye out for flying objects.
Lina looked from Amelia back to the room and facefaulted seeing the destruction. "Not again. Zel, what are they fighting over this time?"
"I'm not exactly sure. It all started when Xelloss asked Filia where she found garters strong enough to hold up that mace. After that...." Zel sighed.
Filia screamed, "AAAAHH! Namagomi Mazoku!" Swing. Xelloss dodged and instead she crushed a chair. Swing. Xel teleported a few steps away, and Fi shattered some glasses along with the table under them.
Xel grinned. "Ahh, Filia. Such beautiful violence. But you missed, again."
This only made Filia angrier. "AAAAAAAAHH!" Swing. Shatter. Xel giggled as he teleported out of the path of yet another swing. Filia looked ready to explode. Suddenly she yelled, throwing her mace straight at him. Xelloss deftly dodged yet again, turning to watch the mace clatter into a shelf of wine bottles behind his former position. Filia enraged, and now weaponless, took advantage of his distraction to lunge at him and grab him by the shoulders.
"Eh?" Xelloss turned to face her and then smiled, seemingly unconcerned by his current position. Filia hesitated, suddenly realizing that her face was now inches from his own.
Xel grinned. "Yare, yare. It seems you've caught me. So, now what are you going to do?"
Filia looked like she was trying to decide whether to strangle him or decapitate him. Unable to make up her mind, she jerked him closer and planted a firm kiss right on his lips. Much to the surprise of everyone in the room. Xelloss' eyes actually opened in surprise at this unexpected assault. But then, they shut again as he put his arms around her and began to return the kiss. Amelia gasped and let go of Zel, whose eyes were about to pop out of his head. Lina actually dropped her ice-cream, for once seeing something scary enough to distract her from food. Gourry shrugged unconcerned until he noticed Lina's ice-cream cone. "Oh, oh," he mumbled, guarding his own cone. "Now, she'll probably take mine."
Several long moments later, Xel and Filia pulled apart and looked at each other. Then, Xel smiled again. "Filia-chan, that was certainly an interesting attack."
"AAAAAGH!!!!" Filia dived for mace-sama and came up in a vicious swing. Xelloss, still slightly off balance, didn't teleport away this time and was soundly smashed in the face. Filia grinned triumphantly. "Gotcha!" Xelloss, meanwhile, pulled himself up from the wreckage of what used to be a table and watched as Filia stalked off to her room.
"What just happened?" Zelgadis asked, picking his jaw up from the floor.
"I'm not sure," Lina replied hesitantly. Then, she noticed her ice-cream on the floor "Oh, no! I dropped my ice-cream! Gourry, give me yours. I'm hallucinating from hunger."
Gourry: "Hallucinating?"
Amelia recovered at the thought of ice-cream, "Um..., Why don't we all go back to the ice-cream parlor, and you can get a new one."
"Ok," Lina relented, and Gourry sighed with relief. They went off, dragging a still gaping chimera, and trying to forget the frightening hallucination. Behind them, Xelloss sat amid the wreckage and Filia sat in her room, both pondering what exactly just happened.
Filia pulled out her tea set while she thought to herself, What is going on?? Did I really kiss that disgusting mazoku? Hey, it worked pretty well to stop him from dodging! How dare he ask such things! He makes me soooo mad. I could smash that smile right off his face. I could just beat him till there's nothing left to smile. I could kiss him till his lips fall off. ??? Ohhhhh, what is he doing to me? I can't let this go on. Somehow, I've got to get away from him! I can't abandon the quest, so somehow I've got to make him leave. Forever. But how?
Xelloss was now sitting on one of the last remaining chairs, also drinking tea as he surveyed the wreckage. Now, what was that all about? I've sensed conflicting emotions from her for some time, but I wasn't expecting that. Isn't that priceless? The dragon priestess in love with the Mazoku trickster. He laughed to himself. But, she'll never admit it.... What lovely violence she creates. Look at the mess I made with one little question. How do they make garters that strong? And what a lovely view when she goes for that mace! He sighed. What violent passion there was in that kiss! Could it be .... He paused his thinking and suddenly opened his eyes to show a decidedly predatory look. That dragon may try to deny her feelings, but a mazoku will get what he desires. And I think I want her....