So the three happy couples, Lina and Gourry, Zelgadiss and Amelia, and Xelloss and Filia, lived happily ever after...
...for about three hours.
"What do you mean, 'what am I cooking for dinner'? Since when do I cook the meals?"
"Since we became a couple," Gourry informed Lina solemnly.
"'Since we'...gah, you are such an idiot, Gourry! Just because we hold hands now doesn't mean I'm gonna become your personal chef! Or maid, for that matter."
"But...," Gourry looked more confused than usual, "that's How It's Done!"
"To hell with convention. I've never cared about it before, and I'm not about to start now."
"But Lina - "
"Just...forget it, Gourry. This was a bad idea. You want someone to play housewife, go to Sairaag and talk to Sheifyl."
Amelia sighed happily from where she'd latched herself onto Zelgadiss' arm. "This is so great, Zelgadiss-san!"
Zel regarded Amelia with a sort of fond annoyance. "Oh?"
Amelia nodded. "Now we can go back to Sailloon and be wed, then rule righteously in the name of Justice and - "
"Wait a moment, Amelia. I don't recall any promise of marriage being mentioned."
"But...we're a couple now. That means that next we're supposed to get married; that's How It's Done."
"Not as far as I'm concerned. I have no desire to marry you."
Amelia burst into tears. "I thought you loved me!" she wailed.
"I may've thought so, myself, at one point. I am sorry, Amelia," he said, not unkindly, "but I don't think I really do love you.
Amelia's weeping degenerated into noisy, incoherant sobs, the only words Zel was able to catch being "mean," "Justice," and "not fair."
Zel beat a hasty retreat.
"Well, namagomi-chan," Filia said fondly, gazing at the mazoku beside her, "where do we go from here?"
Xelloss opened an eye, regarded her a moment, then closed it again. "Where ever Lina-chan is going, of course."
Filia's brow furrowed. "But...I thought we'd go off on our own, spend some time together alone. That is How It's Done, after all."
"Tsk tsk tsk, 'how it's done' amoungst dragons, perhaps."
"Oh, I see. You're under orders to travel with Lina, ne?"
"Oh, no, I'm travelling with Lina-chan of my own accord, although I have Juuou-sama's permission, of course."
"But...why?"
Xelloss' eyes opened for the sole pupose of giving the dragon maiden a knowing wink. "Why do you think?" he asked, a lazy smirk on his face.
"You...you...YOU NAMAGOMI!!" Filia screeched, no fondness in her tone now. "You were just playing with me! Toying with my affections!" She jumped up and pulled out her mace.
"Much as I would enjoy another session with you and your lovely mace, I think I shall depart." With that, he teleported away, leaving a fuming gold dragon swinging her mace at empty air.
"Hey, Lina!"
"Zel? What are you doing out here? I though you'd be with Amelia."
Zel shook his head. "That was a mistake." He paused a moment, then asked, "Why aren't you with Gourry?"
"Like you said: it was a mistake. That twit expected me to become his personal servant or some such nonsense."
"Hullo, Lina-chan. Zel-kun."
"Xelloss?"
"What are you doing here?"
"Yeah, why aren't you with Filia?"
"Why would I be with Filia?"
"Because you two..."
"Well, I thought..."
"Oh," Zel and Lina said in unison, figuring it out.
"Well...," Lina began after a moment of silence, "what do we do now? I don't know about you guys, but I'm none-too-eager to face my ex."
Zel shrugged. "I'm certainly in no hurry to get back to Amelia."
"Ne, then why don't we three just leave them be?" Xelloss suggested.
Lina and Zel shared a glance. "Works for me," they said together.
And with that, they rode...er, walked off into the sunset.