MST: Epitaph: A Friend's Greeting and Farewell


Notes

navy - document to be MSTed

NOTE! THIS MST IS NOT INTENDED TO CAUSE OFFENCE TO THE AUTHOR OR ANY READER! LI WALKER ACTUALLY REQUESTED THIS! IF THE CHARACTERS SAY SOMETHING, IT MAY NOT MATCH MY OPINION AS THE AUTHOR. HELL, I'M JUST MSTING.


The scene opens in a dark viewing room. Many seats are in a row before the screen, and a lava pit bubbles away merrily in the background. Tortured screams can be heard. A Mysterious Figure stands in the shadows by the screen.

Mysterious figure: Welcome to the Island. Never hope to excape. Never hope for relief. Never hope, period. In the immortal words of that really neat guy, Dante, "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here."

Lina, Amelia, Zelgadis, and Valgarv stop their tortured screaming and give a few more token pulls at the firmly shut door, while giving the Mysterious Figure strange looks

Zelgadis: Xelloss... who are you TALKING to?

Mysterious figure: steps out of shadow and points towards the viewers, smiling Them, of course.

Valgarv: You are one sick, twisted little pervert.

Beastmaster Xelas Metallium: sitting in one of the seats, she licks the last of the butter from her fingers and crumples the bag, somehow NOT setting the bag on fire with her cigarette Yes, that's what I said last time he did that. to Xelloss Aren't you, though?

Xelloss: Of course! I'd be hurt if anyone thought otherwise!

Amelia: Yes, that's Xelloss-san all over.

Lina: sarcastically, giving the door one last good tug Are you going to have him whip himself again?

Xelas: considering Hmmm...

Xelloss: ^_^

Harukami: still gazing at Xelas, wipes drool from her face and nods You might as well, you know, Juuou-sama. He'll enjoy it.

Xelas: True. Why not? tosses Xelloss a whip Thirty lashes, Xelloss.

Xelloss: happily Yes, Juuou-sama! sounds of self-mutilation commence Ow. ^_^ Ow. ^_^ Ow. ^_^ Ow...

Xelas: sadly I want more popcorn.

everyone facefaults

Lina: The machine's out of popcorn.

Zelgadis: dryly And I wonder why.

Lina: TORTURE IS HUNGER-INDUCING, OKAY?!

Valgarv: With you, everything is fucking hunger inducing.

Xelloss: Oooh, Lina, I didn't know you were hungry to -

Xelas: crabby Shut up and continue whipping yourself. pulls a bottle of something so alcoholic it sends out fumes and begins to sip

Amelia: trying to put a brave face on things So, Harukami-san, we're finishing off the story with that girl and her dead pet dragon?

Valgarv: Dragons are NOT pets. Dragons are -

Xelloss: Playthings! ^_^

Xelas: Xellosss....

Xelloss: Hai. Ow. ^_^ Ow. ^_^ Ow. ^_^ Ow. ^_^...

Amelia: trying to find her ground again But that's the one we're doing, right?

Harukami: nods That's right, Ame-chan! Li sent it for that purpose.

Xelas: Lei Magnus?

Harukami: Er, no. Li Walker.

Xelas: Pity. He was good looking.

Xelloss: That he was. sees Xelas's look I'm done! hands her the whip I'm a real good boy, aren't I?

Xelas: And you know what kind of treat a good boy gets! smiles and exhales smoke. It's remarkable that the light at the end of the cigarette hasn't set fire to the alcohol fumes

Harukami: I'm sure we don't WANT to know. shakes head Anyway... stands up and inserts tape

Lina: You know that I hate you.

Harukami: I love you too, Lina-chan! blows kiss Ah, it's starting...

Epitaph: A Friend's Greeting and Farewell

Xelloss: leers at Zelgadis Are you my friend?

Zelgadis: No.

Xelloss: not upset, turns to Lina Are YOU my friend?

Lina: Xelloss, you don't HAVE friends.

Xelloss: to Valgarv Are YOU my friend?

Valgarv: Fuck no!

Xelloss: to Amelia, sniffling slightly Are YOU my friend?

Amelia: hesitating, then finally taking pity on the pathetic-looking Mazoku Of course I am, Xelloss-san.

Xelloss: Goody gumdrops! leaps at her and ends up in her lap, doubled over so that his face is between her breasts. His voice is muffled. I LIKE having friends...

Amelia: ACK!

Zelgadis: reaches over incredably calmly, grabs Xelloss, and puts his head forcibly through the seat in the row ahead Go away.

Xelloss: muffled for a different reason But I LIVE here!

Lina: slyly Jealous, Zel?

Zelgadis: giving a viscious kick to Xelloss's prosterior, sending the rest of him through the seat as well Of course not.

All my training brought me to this.

Xelloss: ...whorehouse in the middle of nowhere!

everyone gives him disbelieving looks

I am finally ready to confront the murderer. Yes...ready.

Xelas: And, boy, am I ready. purring, shifting so her bosom bulges more

The men who aren't used to her - Valgarv and Zelgadis - swallow hard, unable to rip their gazes away, as the sight incites basic primal urges in 'em. Harukami is in much the same situation but is only slightly less obvious as she drools into a convienient empty popcorn bag. Lina and Amelia are less amused.

Amelia: Zelgadis-san? waves hand in front of his face Zelgadis-san? still no response from Zelgadis, so Amelia grabs his ear and twists, hard.

Zelgadis: swats absently at her hand, not paying any attention

Xelloss: advising while sneaking into Valgarv's lap, the half-Mazoku's attention elsewhere You can try wearing less clothing. Zel-kun IS eternally stuck a teenager, you know.

Lina: disgustedly Men.

Harukami: smirks, still able to think while faced with this sight, being more used to thinking about several things at once, unlike the obsessive two drooling on their seats Jealous, Lina-chan?

Lina: HELL YES! thinks I mean, of course not! Me? Why would I be jealous that all she has to do is move to get men's attention, whereas in my case, even stripping usually merely gets me comments on how small my breasts are. Why would I be jealous?

Harukami: Oh, no reason. Anyway, you've got NICE breasts.

Amelia: Zelgadis-san! she is clearly not used to being jealous in any way, shape, or form, and doesn't really seem able to deal with it Um...

Xelloss: curling into Valgarv's chest, still with the half-Mazoku not noticing Try commenting loudly on how hot it is in here, and then taking your shirt off. That usually works.

Amelia: blushes brightly But Xelloss-san! Under this, I'm not -

Harukami: Oh, that's right. Underwear is not common in a world with the Slayers technology. Occasional, but not common. pulls out Ha-chan's Bag of Clothing and digs around in it, yanking out a skin-tight leather haltertop Here, wear this instead of your shirt.

Amelia: I'm not desperate, you know. offended I'll just... dashes behind the seat for a minute, rustling sounds emerge, and she comes back wearing a small white two-piece top and miniskirt which shows a great deal of skin This'll do.

Xelloss and Harukami whistle appreciatively, while Lina sulks in her seat

Xelas: smirks and crosses her arms over her breasts, snapping the men's attention back to where it's supposed to be

Valgarv: I can't belive I... notices Xelloss curled contendedly into his chest and shrieks like a fangirl EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! GET OFF! punches at Xelloss, who phazes back to his seat, smiling

Zelgadis: to himself Oh my. Looks back towards Amelia. He blushes bright red, eyes widening Oh... my. swallows hard, and with great effort, turns his eyes back towards the screen, though they do keep flickering back towards Amelia every few seconds

"Turn to face me Lina Inverse!! Face your punishment!" I call.

Xelloss: turns to Lina, eyes half lidded only Ne, Lina-san, can I face YOUR punishment?

Lina: suspiciously Sounds too good to be true. What's the catch?

Xelas: Just that he'll like it.

Xelloss: whining I'm HUNGRY...

Xelas: Go torment Valgarv a little. That should feed you enough.

Xelloss: ^_^ OKAY!

Valgarv: O... OI!

It didn't sound that...pathetic in my mind...but it turned out that way. Never mind that...back to the present. The murderer turns to face me, she seems confused. If I were her I would be too.

Lina: You are.

Harukami: She is you?

Lina: NO! SHE IS CONFUSED! I am NOT a murderer! It's all the psycho fic writer's fault! BLAME HER, YOU STUPID KID!!!

Amelia: inhaling deeply, before starting to speak. Zelgadis clutches at his nose, seeming surprised She's not really a kid, Lina-san. Remember the math from the previous part?

Lina: Well, I suppose emotional stunting from dorky obsessing over one thing for years and years of your life IS enough for you to still count as a kid.

everyone looks at Zelgadis

Zelgadis: blinks back at them, while attempting to stop the flow of blood from his nose with a handkerchief What?

The last time she saw me, I was a little girl...eleven years old, covered in soot, holding a dead dragon's head. A little wisp of a thing then, I was. I looked into a mirror before this day...

Xelloss: (as narrator) No I didn't! Which is why I'm attempting to wear orange and green together, and why I've got lipstick marks on my neck, and why my hair has a bird's nest in it! I DIDN'T LOOK INTO A MIRROR FOR NINE YEARS! MWA HA HA HA HA!!

everyone blinks at him, nonplussed.

Xelloss: perfectly composed Yes?

and I am still repulsed.

Zelgadis: dryly No doubt, with all those lipstick marks, mismatched clothes, and the bird's nest and all.

Xelloss: smugly You agree with me, darling.

Zelgadis: You... are a fruitcake.

Xelloss: Yes. Wanna taste?

Zelgadis: stating calmly Ack. raises handkerchief to his nose again, looking deliberately AWAY from Xelloss and back at... Amelia. Clutches the handkerchief tighter.

All this time wanting to hate her...I'm just like her.

More like a negative...My fair blonde hair turned white in my latter years...my eyes a dull grey.

Harukami: Er... how WOULD she know about negatives, anyway? I mean, they don't have photography in the Slayers world.

Amelia: What's photography?

Xelas: blows smoke ring It's when tiny imps draw pictures of things you point 'em at.

Amelia: Oh.

Lina: We know about negatives! They're things like Mazoku, who are always feeding off dark emotions.

Harukami: Not that kind of negative.

Valgarv:... there's another?

And ironically...without styling of it's own...my hair has grown exactly like hers...When I kill her...I'll chop it off.

Valgarv: dryly, as the narrator Oh yeah. And I plan to take her head with it. Did I forget to fucking mention that?

Xelloss: All you wanna do is talk about fucking, Val. You must have a one track mind or something.

Valgarv: grits his teeth as veins pop out of his head, turns his arm into a long black claw thing, and hits Xelloss over the head, hard. Oh, go to hell.

Xelloss: Can't; All hell's broken loose since L-sama killed Philbrezo. Fortunately for all of us, Phibby managed to off that annoying Maryu-ou first. Right?

Valgarv: gets look on his face like someone offered him candy, then took it away and punched him in the gut Garv-sama... curls up in his seat, wrapping his arms around himself

Xelloss: Oh, I'm sorry. obviously not sorry How could I be so insensitive to forget he was boffing you before Philbrezo slaughtered him with all the brutality he could manage? I'm here for you if you need comfort... lays his hand on Valgarv's leg

Lina: Why, you little Mazoku bastard...

Valgarv: one step ahead of her YAROU!!!! grabs Xelloss's arm in a death grip and tosses the surprised Mazoku into the lava pit, then sinks back into his chair

Xelas: seemingly unconcerned Well, that must have hurt.

Xelloss: phazes back into his seat, crispy-looking and steaming Ow... ^_^

Valgarv: mutter mutter

everybody inches away from the volatile half-Mazoku

Back to the present.

Harukami: jumps up, ruffles Zelgadis's hair to make him look vaguely like an absent scientist NO! We must go... poses back to the future!

corny 80's music begins to play as everybody looks at Harukami strangely

While I was reminiscing I stated my demands. Not very diffivult

Lina: 'diffivult'?

Harukami: Typo demon.

Lina: Ah. looks, along with everyone else, at Xelloss.

Xelloss: has pulled out a laptop and is redesigning the spellcheck program for the upcoming Windows 2K. He looks up and blinks cutely at them What?

when you've had practice. A simple fight...me and her...no one else. Anything goes.

The Ranma 1/2 Anything Goes Martial Arts series opening theme music begins to play

Harukami: screams NO! NO MORE MIKADO! NO MORE AZUSA! NO MORE XIAN PU!

Xelas: I should think you might want to wash your hair ONCE in a while.

Harukami: No, not THAT shampoo, Xian Pu Shampoo.

Everyone looks at her like she's insane and back away

Magic, swords...anything. Her friends step back. Fools...how dare they follow the murderer! Oh well...their intelligence was not in question...

Valgarv: smugly Because everyone knew they didn't have any.

Lina, Amelia, and Zelgadis all hit him

the only thing that should be on my mind is the murderer. Lina Inverse...

Xelloss: as narrator And the reason... she was so seexxxyy... falls out of character for the narrator GO ON, GIRL! TAKE HER! TAKE HER RIGHT THERE AND THEN... geez, I'm getting turned on.

Lina: finds a nearby 11 foot pole and hits him with it, hard. YOU PERVERT!

Xelloss: ^_^ ...and that isn't helping.

Drawing my sword, I figured there would be a great battle...which there was

Zelgadis: bored tone - n't. I mean, think about it.

Amelia: Yes, Lina-san is quite accomplished with her sword, and is THE master of black magic. She's pretty good at Shamanist magic too. This girl may have studied for years and years, but...

Zelgadis: But she was so... distasteful look obsessed. How could she concentrate on studying like that?

everyone gives him odd looks

Zelgadis:...what?

. I score a hit here...she scores a hit there.

Xelloss: See? She WAS looking to score!

Lina: hits him again with the 11 foot pole

It's all rather...amusing.

Xelas: Yes... yes, it was. dark, predatory chuckle

everyone slides a few feet away from the Dark Lord

Then, I hear her start muttering those accursed words. Anger flares in my cold eyes. "NO!!!" I scream...this was the murder spell. "HOW DARE YOU!!!" I am filled with such darkness now. She dared to use the same spell that she killed my friend with. SHE DARED!

Lina: dryly Well, you DID say 'anything goes'. Did you really have this planned so badly that you didn't think I might use the Dragon Slave, since this happened to be THE ONLY SPELL OF MINE YOU'D ACTUALLY SEEN?!

Zelgadis: I hate to mention this, but Lina rarely ever uses the Dragon Slave except as a last resort or when she's really pissed off, and judging by the story, she's not either.

Xelloss: slings an arm around Zelgadis's shoulder Let's make this our little secret, Zel-kun.

Zelgadis: Let's not. borrows Lina's 11 foot pole and shoves Xelloss away with it

I'm being sloppy now. I don't care. Tears streak my vision, but I can see enough to tell she is confused by my outburst. She stopped the accursed spell...thankfully. I'm still being sloppy...and am showing the marks to prove it. She is scoring more hits on me then I am her...

Xelloss; This is such a SEXY fic!

Valgarv: You are a sick, sick, depraved little man.

Xelloss: And you're horny. What of it? ^_^

Valgarv: clutches at his horn defensively

Amelia: I'm not sure I'm old enough to be listening to this...

Finally...the final blow. She won. The murderer won.

Xelas: And tell me... is anyone in here surprised?

heads are shaken

Lina: smugly Damn straight!

Amelia: I'm going to be ill...

Zelgadis: Xelloss, I thought I told you to put that bleeding head AWAY!

Dropping my sword I stare at he sword,

Xelloss: It's a he sword! Just like Sherra's!

Amelia: Who's Sherra?

Xelas: Just some girl he killed.

Lina: Xelloss, you're a freak.

Xelloss: That's what the screaming weasels said too.

embedded in my stomach. She lets go and staggers back.

Harukami: All right, who here knows how to use a bladed weapon?

Lina, Zelgadis, and Valgarv raise their hands

Harukami: And what DON'T you do?

Lina, Zelgadis, and Valgarv: Let go of the weapon when you've stuck it into someone!

Harukami: Very good!

I give a slight snarl and pull the blade out, just noticing that it went all the way through. A tingling in my spine tells me so.

Lina: And the blood gushing down your back didn't?

Zelgadis: Yes, that would probably happen... right?

Lina: It did when that spell got me, but I suppose being speared might be different...

Valgarv: No, it isn't. Blood gushing down your back, pain, lots 'n lots of pain, though most people don't normally go for the spinal cord... much smarter just to go a little to the side, though, gods, stomach wounds hurt like hell...

Amelia: Wow, you sure know a lot!

Xelas: blows smoke ring Yes, WELL. We all knew his master liked to stick his sword into him.

Valgarv:...

Strange how you notice those little things that don't really matter...

Zelgadis: Like the fact you're dying...

Lina: Like that fact that your spinal cord was apparently severed.

Amelia: Like the fact that she has no chance for revenge now.

Harukami: Like that wound the size of Toronto...

Xelas: However, the big things never get noticed. drinks more of her Extremely Alcoholic Beverage Like what Xelloss is doing now.

everyone looks at Xelloss

Xelloss: Like the fact Lina is half-naked. holds up Lina's shirt and smiles

Lina: KyAAA! covers herself, managing to juggle the 11 foot pole enough that she bonks Xelloss a good one. She then uses the pole to take her shirt back and dives with it behind the seats

Zelgadis: ... feeling the normal teenage male response, he reaches for his handkerchief. It will never be the same again, and is too soaked to aborb any more.

Amelia: Here, Zelgadis-san! use mine! bends forward to hand him her handkerchief... giving an amazing cleavage shot

Zelgadis: Urk! grabs for the handkerchief

I hold a hand over my wound...futile really. Blood is flooding out my back anyways.

Lina: So she DID notice the blood... but it clearly wasn't one of the little things, and therefore not important enough to mention.

Xelloss: Blood...

Xelas: Blood blood blood...

Xelloss: mmm....

Xelas: Yummy...

everyone moves a little further from the two drooling Mazoku

Suddenly...pain wrenches through my gut. It makes me double over in pain, giving a slight gasp.

Valgarv: Oh, go on. Scream. I did.

Xelloss: That's 'cause you're a wimp, Val-kun!

Valgarv: WHO'S A WIMP, FRUIT-BOY?!

Xelas: FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

Harukami: Come on, people, calm vibes! Calm vibes!!

Only then do I notice that my hair is stained red in most places. For some reason...this makes me extremely angry.

Zelgadis: dryly You're dying, girl. I think you have more important things to worry about.

Amelia: No, you see, she's always hated Lina, and now, in the moment of her death, her blood stains her hair Lina's hair colour...so...

Zelgadis: Um, so... she's studied magic for 9 years and doesn't know even a simple healing spell?

Amelia: She has to die to be complete! Otherwise she'll be unhappy her whole life!

Valgarv: Yeah! How can one be happy when the one being you depend upon is killed by some annoying half-pint!?

Lina: "annoying half-pint"?!

Valgarv: It's fucking misery! You can't spend the rest of your life like that, you want to die more 'n anything... but... but you CAN'T! If you did... you'd never be able to face your loved one in the next life! REVENGE! gets almost orgasmic That's all it's about, you know. Dancing with death and knowing you'll take 'em all with you! It doesn't matter what will happen to you - truthfully, you WANT oblivion! Want it! But damned if you won't get them all for killing him and not even mourning!

Zelgadis: Well, yes, but she has no chance to win now. It was a pointless sacrifice.

Valgarv: Stop interrupting my rant, stone boy.

Zelgadis:..."stone boy"?!

Valgarv: goes back to being orgasmic And then, only then, when they're all dead, all dead, all bleeding and screaming for not caring, for not saving, for not giving a damn about what death means to others, then you can be happy in death, and go to your dead love's arms without another care, or if that can't happen, at least to oblivion where you don't have to think about all the shitty things life's done to you ever, ever again! Yes! YES! THAT'S WHAT IT'S ABOUT! BA HA HA HA HA HA -

Zelgadis and Lina look at each other, then simultaniously bash Valgarv

Valgarv: blink What?

The murderer takes a step forward but stops when I flash a look of pure hatred at her.

Xelas: Yes, 100% pure hatred! No artificial flavours or colouring!

Reaching down to my boot, I pull out my dagger that I strategically placed there.

Xelloss:...impaling my foot.

Looking up I smile slightly. "Murderer..." I try to yell, but it comes out more like a strangled joking sound.

Lina: Now it's back to being Slayers! Jokes even when you're dying!

Amelia: Still, a joking sound?

Xelloss: That means there's a sitcom audience in the background. ^_^

Amelia: Oh.

Giving up words, I hurl the dagger. It misses...as if I'm surprised. She dodges and it merely clips some of her hair. A fairly good shot considering everything...

Zelgadis: as narrator such as the fact I'm apparently incompetant...

Crimson floods my eyes. Funny...I don't remember bleeding from my head...why am I seeing blood. Suddenly, everything swims,

Xelloss: singing and making the hand motions Swimming, swimming, in the swimming pool! When it's hot, and when it's cold...

and I fall to my knees. My legs buckling, unable to hold my weight anymore, I fall to my back, legs still twisted somewhat to my side.

Harukami: Question, Zel! raises hand

Zelgadis: Yes?

Harukami: If that tingling in her spine meant that the sword HAD gone all the way through, therefore severing her spine, shouldn't she be paralyzed or dead instantly?

Zelgadis: gets out a medical book and reads a few pages, then closes it with a snap Yes. When a spine is severed, the result is instantaneous. She should be unconcious or dead, and unable to move her whole body or, at best, her legs. She shouldn't have stood that long or been able to throw the dagger. The shock from the nervous backlash of the severing of the nervous center is enough to kill most people.

Harukami: Ah. Just asking.

As my vision and other senses start to fade, an image comes before me. It the murderer. Again, the look of pity. "I...d..don't need your... pity!" I spit out at her. "I..I...didn't need...it then....and I don't...n...need it...now!"

She merely shakes her head but continues to stare at my prone body.

Xelloss: as Lina Girl, I'm into unconcious people. And I want you. I want you NOW.

Lina: You're such a pervert, Xelloss.

Xelloss: blink No, I do. I want you now, Lina.

Valgarv: Fucking fruitcake.

Xelloss: No, that'd be if I did... grabs Valgarv's groin this.

Valgarv: goes catatonic for about 5 seconds and then screams and throws Xelloss away

I can't feel it anymore. Sure-fire sign of death creeping. I can feel its presence in the back of my mind. The murderer's face is still there...but fading quickly. Thankfully. I didn't want to see that...that heathen's face any more.

Amelia: Heathen? But what does religion have to do with it?

Lina: Nothing at all.

Amelia: But... oh.

Not when such a beautiful vision was waiting behind closed lids.

There was my friend. He looked sad...almost. But he also looked glad. To see me most likely.

Xelloss: NOOO! They're back!

Lina: What's back?

Xelas: smoke ring The really short choppy sentances.

Lina: NOOOO!

Valgarv: Revenge of the Short Choppy Sentances!

Zelgadis: The Short Choppy Sentances Strike Back.

Amelia: Short Choppy Sentances: The Next Wave of Terror.

Harukami: Shh. It's a literary device to show she's reverted to the mindset of that 11-year old. I hope.

As the vision of him gets clearer, the murderer completely fades away. I look around and can see everything now. I'm young again. Older then when my friend left...but not as old as I was before I faced...faced...who did I face? The memory is slipping. My friend is calling. He wants to go race in the field. We did that yesterday...oh well.

Xelloss: No, you GOT LAID in the field. Remember?

Harukami: LAID in the field, pervert, not GOT laid in the field.

Xelloss: Same difference. ^_^

I bet I can beat him this time...


Lina finished burying her opponent in a lightly decorated grave.

Amelia: She's dead?

Xelas: I told ya I thought the narrator was dead.

Valgarv: Wait one fucking minute! If... if she's dead, then who was telling the story in first person?!

They all look at each other. Twilight Zone music begins to play.

Lina: nervous laughter Don't be silly, Valgarv! I'm sure it's nothing important!

Valgarv: nervous laughter Of course! No fucking way it'd happen!

the music stops and everybody shudders

A small rock of a headstone lay at the head, enscribed with the sword that had ended that life. Brushing off her hands, she stared at the grave a moment more and then walked over to where her friends were waiting. They then traveled on.

After walking a ways in silence, Amelia ventured a question. "Lina...who was that?" she showed who she was talking about by pointing back over her shoulder to their previous location. Lina sighed.

"Someone from long ago...A regret of mine...I'm sad that it ended itself this way."

Lina: NONSENSE! I've got no regrets! Never!

Xelloss: Not unless it's food you never got to eat. ^_^

Lina: Are you implying I'm shallow?!

Xelloss: I never said the word, you did.

And with that, ended the whole conversation. As their figures faded into the horizon, one beam of light through the trees hit the stone in its rest in the shadows.

She lived,
to bring anothers death;
but in turn,
found her own.

May her soul rest
with that
which she saught
to avenge.

Zelgadis: A suitable gravestone for a pathetic, obsessive adversary, considering that Lina didn't even spell 'sought' right.

Amelia: And 'anothers' should be 'another's'.

Lina: Well, if I were me, which I am, I'd not bother checking my spelling over someone like THAT.

Valgarv: not waiting for ceremony as Harukami takes the tape out of the VCR So we can go now?!

Harukami: Sure. Explore the island. Have fun!

Lina: hears Whaddya mean 'explore the island'?! I thought we were going home!

Harukami: I never said THAT! I just said I'd let you out, as in out of the room. as they advance on her Oh look, it's my bed time! phazes out

Lina: COME BACK HERE, YOU TRAITOR!

Zelgadis: It's only to be expected. So, we're trapped on an island.

Xelloss: Well, it's not like you won't have COMPANY, Zel-kun! indicates himself and Xelas

it slowly dawns on everyone that not only are they trapped on an island... they're trapped on an island with a horny Xelloss and no way out that they know of.

Tortured screams fill the air once more.


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