Zelgadis: You're sick, girl, sick.
Harukami: Who, me? ^_^
Xelloss: Now you're getting the hang of it. ^_^
Zelgadis: Tell me the blue implies Valgarv.
Valgarv: WHAT THE FUCK?!? WHY ME!?
Zelgadis: BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ME!
Xelloss: ^_^;
Harukami: I'm not telling. It's better if they figure it out on their own.
Xelloss: See? You're really learning!
Zelgadis: OK. Who's the wolf.
Harukami: Sore wa...
Xelloss: Himitsu desu!
Harukami: ps. This one really IS yaoi.
Once upon a time, there was a chimera known as Little Blue Riding Hood. He was named this because he always wore a hood over his face and his skin was blue.
One day, Little Blue Riding Hood heard that his grandfather/great-grandfather had gone mad due to his blindness, and packed goodies (poisoned) in a basket to make him feel better (or at any rate, kill him.).
Whistling a happy tune, Little Blue Riding Hood set off through the woods towards his psychotic grandfather/greatgrandfather's home.
He was so excited at the chance of seeing his grandfather/great-grandfather dead that he entirely forgot about the story of the big bad wolf who dwelt in the woods.
The same wicked wolf was watching Little Blue Riding Hood as he walked, an evil smile lurking on his face. "What an amusing chance this is," the wolf murmured, smiling. "I shall have to... take advantage of this."
The wolf teleported in at the edge of the path, 'accidentally' bumping into Little Blue Riding Hood and pulling the hood off. "My pardon!" he smiled. "What intriguing skin you have!"
"Go to hell," Little Blue Riding Hood snarled, pulling his hood up again.
"Temper, temper," the wolf tsked, still smiling. "Such harsh words from such a pretty face."
Silently, Little Blue Riding Hood pushed past the wolf and continued along the path. The wolf fell into step behind him.
"Where're you going?"
"Why do you care?" Little Blue Riding Hood replied sarcastically.
"Sore wa Himitsu desu!" smiled the wolf. "Ne, ne, where're you going?"
"If I tell you, will you leave me alone?"
"Maybe."
Little Blue Riding Hood sighed. "I'm taking a basket of goodies to visit my grandfather/great-grandfather who's gone stark raving mad. Well, more mad."
"Poisoned, hmm?"
"Yeah."
"Good luck."
"Thanks."
The wolf's smile brightened even more. "Where does your grandfather/great-grandfather live?"
Little Blue Riding Hood rolled his eyes. "Over the hill and through the woods, sha la la. Aren'tyou supposed to leave me alone now?
Smiling, the wolf clutched at his heart, pulling out a handkerchief and wiping away an imaginary tear. "Then adieu, adieu... until we meet again!" Which will be sooner than you think, added the wolf mentally.
Quickly, the wolf phazed out and teleported to the grandfather/great-grandfather's home. Rushing in, he saw the grandfather/great-grandfather about to raise Shabrinigido. "Ah, ah, ah," the wolf smiled,"Shabrinigido-sama is seeing a lady Mazoku and would not be pleased to be interrupted." He blasted the grandfather/great-grandfather to hell and gone, and hid the body in the closet. Quickly, he dressed in some of the grandfather/great-grandfather's spare red robes, put his hair in poingys, and lay down on the bed just as Little Blue Riding Hood arrived.
"Grandfather/great-grandfather?" Little Blue Riding Hood called. "I brought you some yummy goodies."
"Just put them on the table, dear," the wolf replied., "and come nearer so I can hear you better."
"My, grandfather/great-grandfather, what an annoying voice you have."
"The better to talk to you with, my dear," smiled the wolf.
"My, grandfather/great-grandfather, what an evil smie you have."
"The better to greet you with, my dear," the wolf grinned, opening his eyes.
"My, grandfather/great-grandfather, what violent eyes you... hey, wait, you're not supposed to be able to open your eyes.
"Oops," smiled the wolf, and pounced Little Blue Riding Hood.
"No! Stop! Pervert!... ung... no, don't touch me there!" Little Blue Riding Hood shouted, struggling in the wolf's clutches. "I -- stop that! You ecchi! No... don't.... oh.... ooooh..."
It so happened that a passing swordsman heard the cires coming from the house of the dead grandfather/great-grandfather. "Oh no!" he cried. "Sounds like someone's in trouble!" He rushed towards the house, then stopped as he heard the cries more clearly. "Oh..." he blushed bright red and headed away at top speed.
Little Blue Riding Hood was doomed.
Little Blue Riding Hood lay on the bed, exhausted. "Itai," he commented, glaring at the wolf.
The wolf smiled.
"It's not fair," Little Blue Riding Hood complained, shifting to try to ease the pain in his lower back. "I'm the good guy. I'm supposed to win."
"Oh, you won, I fully admit it."
"NO! I -- I mean..." Little Blue Riding Hood blushed, confused. "I don't even like you."
"Don't you?"
"OF course not! I... stop that! You..."
"Yes?" Smile.
Little Blue Riding Hood sighed. "You fruitcake. You win."
The wolf smiled and they screwed like minks happily ever after.
Zelgadis: RA TILT!
Harukami: DON'T BLAME ME, I CAN'T BELIEVE I WROTE THAT EITHER!
Xelloss: Oh, how gracefully you toast people, Zel-chan! glomp
Zelgadis: WAAAUUUGH!
Harukami: Email me at haruka_lover@hotmail.com!
Zelgadis: GET OFFA ME!