The Truth Behind Anime Schisms!


(Slayers) During the Lord of Nightmare's image song, Take Your Courage, there's this tinny voice saying "Ready for takeoff." Why?

Easy! The Sea of Chaos is located in an airport.

(Sailormoon) Sailorpluto's attack, "Dead Scream" is whispered, while Sailorsaturn's, "Silence Glaive!" is shouted. Why this contradiction?

You see, everyone always overlooks poor Pluto, which is really dumb of them, since she's the only one who knows what's going to happen next episode. She's given up on getting attention and does the bare minimum to let off her attack, since nobody would thank her for it anyway. Saturn, however, is idolized by people everywhere and so she draws attention to herself by screaming her attack. This is also why Pluto implied that Saturn should be destroyed by the Outers way back in S... she knew that the damn brat would always steal her spotlight and wanted revenge.

(YuYu Hakusho) Are Hiei and Kurama really lovers?

rolls eyes No... they're just "good friends." NEways...

(YuYu Hakusho) Is Kurama a girl?

No. He/She's a Starlight, Sailor Starfox.

(Slayers) Repeatedly in NEXT, blue-eyed characters such as Martina and Amelia's eyes turn red in various scenes. Why does this happen?

Well, you wondered where the missing five parts of Shabranigido were sealed? The truth is, they're in Amelia, Martina, Lina, Zelgadis, and Gourry.

(Gundam Wing) I'm confused. I've only seen the beginning and end of GW, but at the beginning they call Relena "Relena Dorian" and later, "Relena Peacecraft". Does she have two identities or is she just identical twins seperated at birth?

She is the anticrist. She is everywhere. Evil Big Sister is watching you...

(Please Save My Earth) Why is Jinpachi such an idiot?

Well, they explain at one point that people are reborn as what they were thinking of... While stumbling with the illness on the moon base, dying, he slammed his head into a cliff face. His last thought was, "Aw, shit! I'm going to be reborn an idiot!"... and so he was.

(Shoujo Kakumei Utena) How come they all sound Japanese, have Japanese names, but act French and live in a very French atmosphere? Have the Japanese taken over France or the French taken over Japan?

Neither. The Japanese and the French both simultaneously got bored of where they were living and switched countries, so Japan is now France and France is now Japan. In the process, they crossbred some and the result is those freaky shadow girls.

(3x3 Eyes) Why DOES Yakumo never open his eyes?

Well, you wondered where the other 5 parts of Shabranigido were sealed...?

(Slayers and Magic Knight Rayearth) How come Clef, Zelgadis, and Rezo all have the same hairdo?

Some have debated that they all come from the same family, and Clef is some relative who, thankfully, escaped. This is not the truth. The truth is that they all go to the same hairdresser's shop, Ed's Mazoku Cutters, buzz cuts and poingys half a buck each, shavings and throats cut as a free service. Also has free food provided while you wait, but don't eat the meat patties.

(Gundam Wing) Where DOES Heero hide the gun he always pulls out of his shorts?

Dimensional Jock Strap. Moving on...

(Gundam Wing) How come Wufei's hairline's already receeding? I mean, he's only fourteen...

Too much hair gel. I hear it's bad for you. See Taiki's hairline if you want more proof...

(Pokemon) If this is a kid's show, how come men crossdress at least once a week?

Waitaminute... James's a guy?!........ Actually... the truth is, they got attacked by human's rights activists for what they did to Zoicite.

(Sailormoon) When Usagi first transforms infront of Mamoru, in that elevator thingy, how come he stares tranfixed? Is he really that much of a pervert?

Yes. Actually, I'm just surprised he doesn't stare transfixed more often. I guess some things stick in the mind, even if you do get your mind wiped about once a week.

(Sailormoon) How come it's so easy to brainwash Mamoru?

Usagi's stream of thrown objects hitting his skull leave him very eager to remember something... ANYTHING... else.

(Shamanistic Princess) That nifty eye that forms on her hand in ink... where does all the ink come from?!

Writer's space, from all those people who delay writing their fics.. very similar to what I am doing here.

(Slayers) Are Garv and Valgarv lovers?

See answer to 3 above.

(Slayers) Ok. So why would Valgarv want someone as goddamn ugly as Garv?

If he was around in the Shimma war, he's several hundereds of thousands of years old. Now, he may not be gentle on the eyes, but think of the EXPERIENCE...

(Slayers) Does Beastmaster Xelas Metallium have a whips and chains fetish?

.......... I don't know. But if you ever find out, please send me the photographs.

(Fushigi Yuugi) What's wrong with Suboshi that he fell for a stuck up girl like Yui?

Two words: Erotic brat. Actually, it's probably better to ask what ISN'T wrong with Suboshi...

(Fushigi Yuugi) Amiboshi wrote on his arm in blood to pass a message to Suboshi, but in the next few minutes, the marks were gone. How did they heal this quickly?

They didn't. The truth is, their part-time job is as etch-a-sketches. Shake 'em and erase the message!

(Fushigi Yuugi) Is Tomo's laugh ALWAYS that spooky?

No. He had laryngitis for the recording. Sad but true.

(Sailormoon) Have you noticed how the monsters conveniently get stronger just as the senshi get stronger? I mean, wouldn't it have been nasty if Galaxia had invaded in season 1?

..... yes and yes.

(Ruroni Kenshin) What WAS in their minds when they used "Tactics" for the first end theme?!

howling along "It's time for you to drink my wine with your proud lips..." what? Oh. That's what you get for recording after buying hentai manga.

(Slayers) If Rezo's blind, how come he can read books and see where he's going and draw perfectly symmetrical magic circles? And if he can do all these things, how come he WANTS to cure his blindness?

His astral vision allows him to see the location of living or once living objects, obviously. And his magic is strong enough that he can wipe people's memories of those embarrassing moments they see him walk into stone pillars. And obsession is a family trait, you know. It's genetic. It's really not his fault. Just humour him, okay. taps the side of her head knowledgably

(Sailormoon) Does Zirconia really hate the Amazon Trio that much to put them in those outfits?

No, she was drunk.

(Sailormoon) ZIRCONIA'S FEMALE?!

Debatable, but sadly true. Don't tell the rest of the female gender, tho. It's a real shock to a feminine pride...

(Slayers) IS there any Slayers character who Xelloss hasn't slept with in fanfiction at one time or another?

Uh... thinks really, REALLY hard Prince Phil. Actually, I'm not sure any author who wrote that would survive the fans' response...

(Slayers) Why did Xelloss kill all the Gold Dragons in the Ka-Ryu area?

Well, some people have claimed that it was on a whim, due to Xelas-sama's order, or even because he was in love with Valteria who was 'killed' by the Golds... but the truth is that, in an attempt to secure a peace treaty with the Beastmaster's folks, they got together and Xelloss offered to cook... and then pretended that he'd MEANT to do that...

(YuYu Hakusho) Why is Karasu blond?

Ever seen Ai no Kusabi? grin Well, he's powerful, dominant, and keeps and plays with his pets. Good enough for anyone.

More questions welcome! Send 'em in!


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