I was trying to help Ami (yes, the same one ^~^) with her website once. In part of it she asked for "dear character" letters, and so I wrote a few funny ones (particularly the one to Garv! ^.~).
Dear Zangulus:
First things first.....who DRESSES you? You look like a scarecrow, I'm sorry...but you just do. Second, hun, why on earth did you wear that ratty old hat of yours to your own wedding?! Talk about tacky...well...then again you married Maruchina....eh heh. No comment. Another thing...you keep saying, "next time we'll settle the score for good!" to Gourry, like you'll actually EVER finish your little battle. Just get OVER it, all he did was cut your cheek! Well....I think that's all I wanted to say...I'll bother you again later when I think of something else, ne?
Jala-chan ^~^
NOTE: The following is much like "The Concert," a Slayers fanfic by myself as well....^~^
Dear Valgarv:
I'm just curious....I've been wondering for the longest about something, and I wanna know if you can answer some questions for me. Since you've got that big horn thingy sticking out of your head, do you rub your head on trees like deer do? Does your horn ever get stuck in the trees? I mean, it's only logical.... What would happen if you were putting a shirt on, would it get stuck on your horn? Did you know you look like a kawaii version of a conehead? Hmm....that's all I can think of, for now. Biya!
Jally-chan
Dear Garv:
I just wanted to break this to you, seeing as you think you're so sugoi and all. Chiya, you might whip sexy Zerosu-chan into pudding, but you've got really, REEEAAAALLLLYYYYYY funky eyebrows, I'm sorry. Do you run a zoo? I think I see a giraffe head sticking out.....oh wait, that's a trapped fly. Never mind. Maybe you should get some hedge clippers and see if you can tame dem dar suckers before they tangle up with your ear hairs!
Your BLUNT pal,
Jala Silverleaf