The lights came on in the large studio. This is the set of "The Anything Goes Game!" (Not a Ranma 1/2 fic!) The host sat behind her podium as her annoucer, a 5 inch tall chipmunk, introduced the day's contestants. The camera crew began filming.
"Hello welcome to 'The Anything Goes Game! There's your hostess, The Nameless Happy-Go-Lucky Director of Romeo & Juliet:Slayers Go Shakespeare!" ('Tis a shameless plug.)
"Thank you Alvin! Now let's introduce our contestants all from the show 'The Slayers'." The host smiled. (It's easier refering to myself as the host instead of "The Happy-go-lucky director of R&J, SGS" ^.^;) "She's a peace-loving justice freak. Let's welcome Ameria Wil Telsa Sailoon!" Ameria was up on the rafters and fell gracefully to the ground, of course she landed on her face. She took her designated seat, smiling and waving to everyone in the audience. The hostess smiled. "How are you Ameria?"
"I'm just fine. I wonder, how come you invited me to be on your game show?"
"Well I thought that I was being too mean to you in R&J:SGS. (Keep watching the shameless plugs!) So I decided to be nice to you for a change."
"Oh..Ok." Ameria sat relaxed.The hostess nodded.
"Our next contestant is a confused youth. His eternal search for a cure has earned many admirations, not to mention, many female fans. It's everyone's favorite blue-boy Zelgadis Grewyers!" Zelgadis came out wearing his mask. The females in the audience started screaming and waving "I Love Zel" signs. He sat down on his chair and crossed his legs. The hostess motioned for the crowd to cut it out. "How're you Zel? Why don't you take off your mask?"
"I'm fine. Alright." He took off his mask only to start the female fans screaming again. "Am I that freakish to you people?!" He yelled at them. One of the fans got loose and ran up to Zel.
"We don't think your freakish. We think you're sexy!" (Which I find sorta scary. People idolizing people they get a bit obsessive, know what I mean?) She handed Zel a bunch of flowers and gave him a little kiss on the cheek and ran off. Zel blushed severely.
The hostess smirked. She turned to the camera. "The next contestant is a rather slow but loveable (Like a dog, mind you!!) master swordsman. It's the guy with an appetite, Gourry Gabriev!" Gourry took a while to come in. Everyone cheered. Shifiel was in the audience jumping up and down. The hostess told him to sit down on the chair next to Zel. He did, in all his blankliness. "Our last contestant is a firery sorceress with an attitude. She's smart, perky, and always hungry. It's the 'Dragon Spooker' Lina Inverse!" Lina jumped out and waved to her fans. The whole house applauded her, not because they were her fans but in fear she would fireball them if they didn't. "Hiya Lina, thanks for coming."
"My pleasure." She smiled. The hostess slapped her forehead.
"I almost forgot! My cohost. He's a fruity funny guy. It's Xellos, the Trickster Priest!" She smiled at the entrance area. Xellos walked in....in full drag. The entire audience was silent.
"Dennis Rodman, Rupaul, eat your heart out. (Please not literally.)" Xellos grinned. The hostess gasped and scowled when Xellos joined her at the podium.
"I thought I told you to wear your normal clothes?" The hostess frowned.
"But how else will I show everyone my beautiful thighs?" Xellos gave a peace sign and blew kisses to the audience. The hostess shook her head. "Fine, I'll change." Xellos snapped his fingers and he was in his normal clothing.
"Ok, Xellos introduce our game."
"Our game is like Jeparody (The spelling is deliberate!). Our players would have to answer in question form. So the real answer is a question. I like that." He opened his eyes. The audience shruddered.
"The Catagories are: Spells, Music, Shakespeare (a form of shameless plugging ^_^), and 4 letter words." The hostess annouced. "Ameria, you're our first contestant and my new best friend. You get to pick first."
"Since when did she become your best friend?" Xellos asked.
"Haven't you ever heard, 'Treat your enemies as if your friends and your friends as if your enemies' or something to that extent?" She whispered. Xellos closed his eyes and gave a hearty laugh.
"I pick Spells for 300." Ameria smiled. The hostess pulled out a card.
"This spell enables the spell user to release a ball of fire." (Who wouldn't get this?) Lina buzzed in first.
"What is a Fireball?" Lina gave her 'victory' sign.
"That is correct. Lina you get 300 points, pick the next catagory." The hostess smiled.
"I'll take Music for 300." She replied. Xellos stepped forward to answer the question.
"This singer sang many such songs as: 'Give a Reason', 'Raging Waves', 'Just be Conscious', 'Infinty', and 'Going History' and voice acts in lots of anime." (Who doesn't know this?) Gourry buzzed in with a grin on his face.
"What is Eric Clapton!!" (No disrespect to Eric Clapton. I love his music~!) He shouted. The wrong buzzer sounded.
"I'm sorry that's incorrect." The hostess frowned. Zelgadis buzzed in.
"Who is Megumi Hayashibara." Zelgadis murmered.
"That is correct. Zelgadis you get 300 points. Pick the next catagory." The hostess smiled. The female fans whistled.
"I'll take 4-letter words for 200." He said in his charismatic voice. The fans swooned. (-_-;)
"This is a part of your body that you use to walk on." Ameria buzzed in.
"What is a foot." Ameria answered.
"That is correct. Pick the next catagory." Xellos smiled. Ameria got 200 points.
"I'll take Spells for 200." She said while jumping up and down.
"This spell was used by Lina to defeat Shabranigdo." Lina buzzed in immediately.
"What is a Giga Slave. And I'll take Shakespeare for 300." Lina recieved her points.
"What tragedy consisted Julius Caesar being murdered by conspirators?" The hostess muttered. She was tired of this game. Zel buzzed in.
"What is Julius Caesar."
"That is correct. Zel you get 300 points giving you 600. Look I'm already tired of hosting so the next question will be the last. You get 500 points if you get it right." She smiled. No one could possibly guess it right. Everyone, except Gourry, leaned in to hear the question.
"The Catagory is music. Who is the 60-80's singer (I can't remember which decade) that sang 'Uwasao Shinjicha Ikenai yo?' ('Don't listen to rumors' would be the translation.)" Suddenly like a silver bolt Gourry buzzed in.
"The answer is.." The camera did a close up of Gourry. They showed him actually looking brilliant. "I mean, Who is Yamamoto Linda or Linda Yamamoto!" He yelled. The hostess looked shocked.
"That is correct. Gourry you get 500 points but Zelgadis wins with 600. Everyone come with me." The contestants followed the hostess and her cohost to a room with 3 curtains. The camera followed as the audience watched on the TV monitors. "There are 3 curtains. You can't trade the prizes you pick from the curtains. Zel which would it be.."
"Curtain no.1?" Xellos pointed, "Curtain no.2 or Curtain no.3?"
"Take no.2! No 1!" The audience could be heard in the background.
"I'll take curtain no.3." He replied. The hostess looked at the other contestants.
"Lina and Gourry you are tied for second place and wouldn't you know it, you have to share curtain no.2." The hostess looked at Xellos to see if he didn't add any sexual innuedo. He didn't. "Ameria you get the leftover choice which is behind curtain no.1." The hostess turned to Zel. Now let's see what you won!" Curtain no.3 opened to reveal an IOU ticket. "You owe me another appearance in a fan fic~!" Zel groaned. "Let's see what's behind curtain no.2!" The curtain opened to reveal: A lifetime supply of lard. Everyone sweatdropped a second later when Xellos walked out of the curtain, wearing nothing but the lard. "I think you can eat lard.." The hostess said in an apologetic manner. "But I wouldn't reccomend it. I'm afraid to even make sure it's lard."
"*****! That was dirty!" Xellos shouted grinning. The hostess turned her head away blushing.
"Get some clothes!" She yelled back. She threw dish soap at him. "This may help you wash it off." She turned to Ameria. "Let's see your prize." She gestured to curtain no.1. The curtain opened to reveal two choices. "You have two choices Ameria. One is Zelgadis' cure!" Zelgadis' eyes looked at the bottle containing his cure. "But that will cause evil to awaken on earth and destroy it. Or you get something entertaining that wouldn't be any harm to anyone." Ameria thought long and hard. The cure was what Mr. Zelgadis wanted but it'll harm the entire world.
"I'll take the second choice." Ameria said proudly, happy with her decision. "I'm sorry, Mr. Zelgadis. I couldn't risk people getting hurt." Zel looked as if he wanted to kill her. He sighed.
"I guess it couldn't be helped. I still hate you though." Ameria latched on to his arm crying. Zelgadis pushed her away in disgust.
"Ameria you won a tape of this program to commerate this day!" The hostess smiled. The lights blanked out. "ALVIN!?!" The lights came on. Xellos walked on with a toothpick on his teeth. (Fully clothed too I might add.)
"Wasn't his fault. Mighty tasty he was." Xellos burped. Everyone started laughing (Like those 50's tv shows.)
"Well bye bye everyone! I hope you had fun. Until next time, This is Mari..! I mean the happy-go-lucky one signing off." The hostess smiled. "Please read Romeo & Juliet: Slayers Go Shakespeare (Yes, a definate Shameless plug.) our sponsor." ^_^ Everyone waved bye to the cameras.
A silly and plain way to say:
The End