Casualties of the Feud


You should expect this part by now...

Me: Ugh!This is disturbing! I always kinda hated this part of the play.

Xellos: What? Death? Why it's just letting you get a taste of it so you would be used to it by the end.

Me: But my favorite character Mercutio.. wait I won't say it.

Xellos: I will do a Mercutio the world has never seen before!

Me: What do you plan on doing Xellos?

Xellos: That is a secret. (He does his trademark pose.)

Me: Typical! I should've seen that coming.Oh well liven it up the best you can. Oh Gourry! (He trots over.)

Gourry: Hm? (He has a half eaten bagel sticking out of his mouth)

Me: Gourry that's disgusting! You shouldn't have food showing from your mouth! It's really not proper etiquette! (Xellos taps her on her shoulder and points to the food table where Ameria and Lina are fighting over the last of the cream cheese. The director turns red and sighs.)

Xellos: You were saying?

Me: Nevermind. Anyway, I've barely even seen you in this play. I might just let you walk around in the backgroud even after...your part is no longer available.

Xellos: She means even after your part dies you can hang around because you're eye candy. ^_^ (That darn fool is smirking!)

Me: I did not say that. It's more like a pity thing!

Gourry: My part dies?

Me: Um...Everyone get ready to stand by!

Xellos: Stand by me. Standby me. Oh if the mountain should crumble into the sea~.

Me: Xellos...(¬.¬) You sung it completely wrong you know..

Xellos: Care to demonstrate the correct way?

Me: No. We have to finish this chapter. How about we all go do karaoke after this? It'll be fun!

Xellos: I'm for it. I'll sing, I will always love you You know that song by Whitney Houston. Oooh and I'll sing If you be my body guard by Paul Simon.

Me: What are you getting at? You need a body guard?

Xellos: (says nothing just grins)

Me: I shall play deaf to your request. (She motions to her crew.) Action~!


"Mercutio and Benvoila are hanging out in the town square with their servants." The director looks at the scene. "'Nuff said." She walks off. The camera crew focuses on the scene and the lights go on Xellos and Ameria.

"I pray thee, good Mercutio. Let's retire. The day is hot, the Capulets abroad, and if we meet, we shall not scape a brawl. The mad dog blood stirs.." Ameria screwed up the lines but the scene kept on. Suddenly the Top Gun theme burst from the background. The happy-go-lucky director turns around to see Naga watching Top Gun with the volume on full blast.

"Hm...Tom Cruise...Like him, hate his wife." Naga drooled. The director motioned for her bouncers to turn the TV off and drag Naga outside the studio. Naga obeyed, hugging the video case of Top Gun as if it was her infant. The director motioned for the scene to continue.

"By my head here comes the Capulets~!" Ameria yells. As Xellos turns to face Gourry and the nameless extras enter.

"By my heel I care not." He says.

"Hey Ameria, Xellos!" Gourry had a cheery smile on his face. The nameless extras slapped their foreheads in disgust. They could do a better job then this idiot. They kept thier tongue.

"Mr. Gourry! You're forgetting your lines again. You know Miss ***** wants to at least try to stay close to the Shakespearean dialogue as possible." (Hm..sounds like butt kissing..) Ameria places her hands on her hips waiting impaitently for Gourry to remember his lines. The director held up some cue cards.

"Hm..Um..Well, peace with you sir, here comes my man." Gourry squinted as he tried to read off of the cards. Xellos couldn't help but giggle as Zelgadis entered the scene. "Romeo, the hate I bear thee can afford no better term than this. Thou art a villain." Gourry beamed.

"Tybalt the reason I have to love thee, Doth much excuse the appertaining rage to such a greeting. Villain I am none. Therefore, farewell; I see thou know'st me not." Romeo replied coolly.

"Boy, this shall not excuse the in..juries..that thou hast done me; therefore turn and draw." Gourry waved his sword in the air. It just happened to be his Sword of Light. (Ladies and Gentleman please refrain from staring directly at the Sword of Light. Thank you.)

"I do protest I never injur'd thee; But love the better than thou canst devise." Zelgadis noticed Xellos snickering at that remark. Blushing, he threw a Ra-Tilt at the Mazoku. Xellos dodged it and stopped laughing. "Till thou shalt know the reason of my love: And so good Capulet, which name I tender as dearly as my own, be satisfied." He turned and started to walk away.

"O calm dishonorable, vile submission!" A la stoccata carries it away! Tybalt, ratcatcher, will you walk?" Xellos shouted. Gourry said nothing for a few moments and then realized Xellos was talking to him and pointed to himself with questioning doubt. "Yes you, you good king of cats! Nothing but one of your nine lives' that I mean to make bold withal, and, as you shall use me hereafter, drybeat the rest of the eight. Will you pluck your sword out of his pilcher by the ears? Make haste! Lest mine be about your ears ere it be out!" Everyone clapped when he said that. Seemed really heroic and yet....so stupid.

"I am for you." Tybalt pulled out his Sword of Light. He finally saw what was going on.

"Good Mercutio, put thy rapier up." Zelgadis said gently. Xellos paid no heed.

"Come sir, your passado!" He and Gourry fight. In haste, Gourry misses the carefully choreographed moves and accidentally stabbed the fruitcake Mazoku. Xellos' face was smiling with ironic delight (I wonder if that could be an oxymoron..). He screamed with the searing pain of the sword of light. "I am hurt! A plague o'both your houses! I am sped is he gone and hath nothing?"

"Art thou hurt?" Benvolia asked with doubt.

"Ay, ay a scratch a scratch. marry, tis enough." He looks at his wound. "Daa! Look at it! It's a deep wound what do you think?!" Xellos shouted at Ameria. Ameria began to cry because Xellos was scaring her. "You've made worm's meat out of me!" He plopped down dead. The entire crew and cast stared blankly for a few minutes, utterly convinced Xellos was dead.

"Bring out the wine!" The happy-go-lucky director shouted. Everyone was in merriment until Xellos dusted himself from the ground and gave everyone a good fruity box on the ears. And so the scene continues.

Gourry walked onto the scene again. Zelgadis didn't seem to care anymore and just barely stuck a plastic fake sword between Gourry's armpits. "Hehe that tickles." he said as he pretended to die. He fell on the ground with his tongue hanging out like some dead animal. (Good acting! needs an oscar!) Romeo looked around and ran away from the scene.

"Okay that was enough death on the play for now." The happy-go-lucky director smiled. "Let's call it a day!" She picked up a camera from her crew. "Come on Xellos! We're gonna go sing karaoke!" Xellos pointed to the camera.

"What's that for?" He asked playfully.

"Well if we film the karaoke of our fair cast I'm sure the tabloids would be paying millions or maybe we could sell it on Fox. 'World's Strangest Group of Shakespearean Karaoke Singers~'!" She hoisted the camera on her back. She grinned.

"I'll help!" Xellos grinned back. "You can be my bodyguard and I can call you Betty."

"Betty when you call me. No I think ***** is fine as is."

"You're right!***** is a great name! I believe I know a bunch of people use it for a middle name."

"Shuuut Uuup~!" They all laughed and the crew and cast joined them on their karaoke escapade. Little did they know they were being filmed or were going to be in another fanfic concerning that someday.. but that my friends that is another story.


Part 6   |   Fanfiction