Me: I've got bruises..ow...(She sits on her director's chair. Ameria walks over to her.)
Ameria: Good morning,Miss *****!
Me: Hello Ameria my bestest best friend in the world. (Ameria looks at her kinda funny and shrugs it off.)
Ameria: I heard you went into Miss Lina's trailer and heard what Mr. Zelgadis and her were saying.
Me: Yep,that I did. (Hands Ameria the tape recorder) Listen to that dearie and all shall be revealed. (Ameria plays the tape only to hear the Mamas and the Papas singing 'California Dreamin')
Ameria: What is this? This isn't funny Miss *****.
Me: Xellos! How dare he tape over that! It was gonna give me ideas for a fan fic..
Ameria: Can I be in it?
Me: Ameria you are in it. I can see it now, the Slayers version of Lord of the Flies. You get to be...hm...Piggy! Yes, Piggy!
Ameria: Piggy? I don't want to play a fat part, Miss *****.
Me: Really? Darn, how about the pig's head that talks?
Ameria: I don't wanna do that! (Ameria begins to cry) I want to play the hero.
Me: Hm..I really want to write another Shakespeare/Slayers crossover...I already have another one planned...minus the dialogue because well...you probably know.
Ameria: Aww. (Naga comes over to join them.)
Me: Hiya Naga
Naga: Hello! Ohohohoho.
Me: Can I ask you a question?
Naga: Yes?
Me: What are you always laughing about? My god nothing's really that funny and everyone knows that laugh is as fake as your bust.
Naga: I don't know what you're talking about. Ohohohoho
Me: Uh-huh..suuure you don't. (Lina comes to join them)
Lina: Has anyone seen Zel?
Me: I'm sure he's already waiting in the next scene. And you're supposed to be there you know. You're in it.
Lina: Oh that's right. (blush)
Me: (whispering to Lina) As requested I grant permission for you two to be in the nude, adds realism.
Lina: o.O
Me: Goodness, won't everyone be surprised at the movie premiere. (She laughs) You're gonna have to beat the Zel fans off with a stick, then! No one knows what I have planned. Now go scurry off. Light's Camera, ACTION!
"These times of woe afford no time to woo. Madam goodnight and commend me to your daughter." Paris trudged out of the parlor room of the Capulet mansion.
"But soft, what day is this?" called Lady Capulet after Paris.
"Monday, madam." Paris smirked. He turned around to stare into Lady Capulet's eyes. His action, however failed because Lady Capulet had no eyes to look into. She had been wearing a veil.
"Monday? Then perhaps Wednesday is too soon. O'Thursday let it be. O'thursday tell her, She shall be married to this noble earl. Will you be ready? Do you like this haste? We'll keep no great ado, a friend or two; For hark you, Tybalt being slain so late, It may be though we held him carelessly. Being our kinsman, if we revel much: Therefore we'll have some half a dozen friends, and there an end. But what say you to Thursday?" Lady Capulet smiled. Her face twitched as if she had an itch on her nose. She quickly looked at her watch. "Egads~! I'm late for my job!" she shrieked.
"What do you mean? This is your job, you're getting paid to act.." The happy-go-lucky director jumped in from the side.
"I took a part-time job in the deli mart next door. I was on break until now." Luna threw her costume off to reveal herself wearing some waitressing garb and ran out the studio. "I'm sorry! I'll have to finish this later!" The director looked blank for a moment.
"But..we're not finished with this scene yet." She noticed the cameras were still rolling. "Daa! I can't stop because time is definately money! I need a Lady Capulet right now! I can't be her so..who can play a substitute..It can't be Xellos because he's already in this scene." She looks around the studio. Ameria begins jumping up and down pointing frantically to herself. Too young. Gourry was eating a turkey sandwich. Hm... She walked right up to Gourry. "Gourry! Can I talk to you for a sec?" Gourry was dragged into Luna's trailer. After much struggling, the director opened the trailer door to reveal a Lady Capulet in funeral threads. As like before Lady Capulet was wearing a dark veil so there was no way anyone could see her eyes. However, this Lady Capulet was clearly taller than the original that skipped out on the scene earlier.
"Um..*****? I can't see a darn thing in front of me. I don't wanna do this!" Gourry whimpered as he tripped on his Lady Capulet dress. He fell face flat from the first step of the trailer door. Xellos watched on in amusement.
"Aww Gourry, you have to do it! Can't you see I'm on my knees begging you to be Lady Capulet just this once?" The director sighed.
"From my point of view you seem to be standing." Xellos giggled. The director glared at Xellos and he shut up.
"Please? I'll treat you to dinner." (I hope my credit card can cover it.) The director gave puppy dog eyes. Gourry frowned from behind the thick veil and nodded. "Alright then. Just read the cue cards." She smiled and motioned her camera crew to go on.
Gourry squinted at the cue cards. I can't see it.Um..I'll just make them up, yeah that's it! "Ok, Mr. Paris, you have to take my friend Lina, to be your wife, next Friday!" Gourry beamed proudly. He was happy he got Xellos' character's name right. The director shook her head.
"Ah well. Next scene!" The director yelled and her camera crew focused in on Juliet's bedroom. Giggles could be heard. What in the world? she thought as the sheets on Juliet's bed were ruffling about. She cued the lights and a bird call. "KAKADOODLEDOO!"
Zelgadis and Lina jumped up in the bed. Zel looked to the balcony window which artificial sunlight entered the room. He began to roll out of bed when Juliet pulled him back. "Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day. It was the nightingale, and not the lark, that pierced the fearful hoolow of thine ear. Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate tree. Believe me love, it was the nightingale." She pressed her head against his chest.
"It was the lark, the herald of morn, No nightingale: look, love, what envious streaks do lace the severing clouds in yonder east: Night's candles are burnt out, and jocund day stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops. I must be gone and live or stay and die." Romeo pushed Juliet gently away and tried to stand up. Juliet pulled him back on the bed crying.
"Yon light is not daylight, I know it! It is some meteor that the sun exhales, to be thee this night a torch bearer and light thee on thy way to Atlas City: Therefore stay yet, thou need'st not to be gone!" Lina improvised a kiss. This was a pretty long and passionate kiss for Zel was getting into this kiss as well. (..ahem.....goodness..) The director threw a tiny paper airplane that hit Lina on the back of the head. They broke the kiss and realized they were still shooting.
"Let me be ta'en, let me be put to death! I am content, so thou wilt have it so. I'll say yon gray is not the morning's eye; 'Tis but the pale reflex of Cynthia's brow; Not that is not the lark whose notes do beat the vaulty heaven so high above our heads: I have more care to stay than will to go. Come death, and welcome! Juliet wills it so. How is't my soul? Let's talk it is not day!" Romeo practically yelled out in a welcoming tone. He kissed Juliet again and as so they do not devour each other's mouths for another 10 minutes, the director threw a paper ball at them on the third minute. They broke away again but this time Lina was quiet. It was her turn to speak but it was really silent in the studio. The paper ball rolled toward the director's feet. She uncrumbled it and her eyes went really wide in disbelief.
"AN ACTOR'S CURSE BALL. THROW AT AN ACTOR AND THEY SHALL REMAIN IN THE CHARACTER THEY PLAY." The director read it aloud. She looked up to see Lina getting fully in character of Juliet, but not in a good way...
"But it is day! Romeo you must leave now! Now!" Juliet pushed Romeo out of bed. "Hurry!" She threw his clothes at him. Zel looked at her somewhat stunned but kept his tongue.
"More light and light. More dark and dark our woes." He began to scramble get his things on by the door. Unfortunetly for him the door was slammed open and it knocked Romeo onto the floor. Naga walked in with a blank expression as she noticed Juliet's shock. She looked behind her and mouthed out an 'oh my'.
"Ohohohoho! Romeo you shouldn't have been standing there. Juliet, your sister's coming so you better get lover boy out of here." Naga bounced out of the room closing the door behind her. Juliet jumped to her husband.
"Are you ok? Here let me help you out." She helped Zel up and led him to the balcony. Zel got ready to climb down when he gazed into Juliet's eyes.
"Farewell, farewell. One kiss and I'll descend." He was just about to kiss the waiting Juliet when the director pointed to her watch, meaning he better not drag it on this time. He closed his eyes and gave Juliet a short kiss. (Zelgadis: Damn that director.) He climbed down without the ladder and waved goodbye to Juliet. "Dry sorrow drinks our blood. Adieu, Adieu!" and he left the scene. Juliet still stood on her balcony in her robes as the nurse and Lady Capulet (hehehe Gourry's still in drag.) entered the room.
"Lina are you up?" Gourry replied kinda fuzzy. Lina looked puzzled.
"Lina? Who is Lina?" She looked closer at the veiled face. "You don't seem like my sister. In fact..you sound just like...a man.." Juliet noticed her "sister" fidgeting.
"Are you still weeping for your cousin?" Gourry asked, sweat beading at his forehead. Juliet pulled off the veil from Lady Capulet's face.
"I can't weep for him if he isn't deceased! Cousin Tybalt!" She gave Gourry a great hug. The director slapped her forehead. (First it's too mushy..golly, it's starting to become some cheesy soap opera!) "You got someone banished because they thought you were dead!" Juliet slapped Gourry on the arm. "All the trouble you caused. For shame!" The director walked on screen. She raised before her a bucket of water.
"Wake up from that character!" She dropped the bucket on Lina who woke up and became herself again.
"Gourry? What're you doing in drag again?" Lina asked raising the bucket slowly off of her head.
"I forgot..oh wait..***** owes us dinner though!" Gourry grinned and looked at the director.
"Really? Did we finish filming? I'm really tired and hungry." Lina got up. "That's a wrap then right? How nice you're treating us all to dinner." Lina smiled. "Hey Philly!Bob!***** says she'll treat us all to dinner!"
"I didn't say that..." The director stuttered. This production is gonna cost me everything. (;_;).
"What was that?" Lina asked with a grin completely ignoring the director. She grabbed her arm. "Come on everyone!" Lina dragged the crying director and the entire cast, and camera crew to the most expensive french resturaunt. I'm sure from there you'll guess how much $$ I'll have to cough up when the bill arrives.
Well that's the end of this chapter. I hope you read the next installment of our humorous tale affectionately called: For the Life of Juliet, Who the Hell Stole My Script!?! Until next time. =)