Chapter 1: Xellos? Nani? The Clair Bible Again!?!?


The inn is filled with noises of laughter and curses. In the corner, the Three Bottomless Pits (A.K.A. Lina, Gourry, and Amelia) stuffs themselves silly. Zelgadis doesn't even touch the food, instead he is drinking coffee. He watches as a tug of war ensues between Gourry and Lina over a apple pie.

Lina: Get your filthy hands off it, Gourry!

Gourry: No way! You already ate the peach cobbler!

The tugging continues until Gourry gets distracted by some heavy-duty cleavage and his grip loosens.

Lina: AHA!! It's mine! Hey, wait a minute ... what are you looking at, Gourry?

Gourry: Me? I wasn't looking at anything!

Lina: You, you, pervert! How dare you let your eyes wander from the splendor of my beauty! My intoxicating charms!

Amelia: Oh, calm down Miss Lina. He probably just spaced out. You know how short Gourry's attention span is.

Lina: Well, he better be spaced out and not staring at some hussy's breast!

The Three Bottomless Pits continue their feeding frenzy.

Zelgadis shake his head and take a sip of his coffee. It sometimes baffles his mind why he continues to stay with them. He could probably find his cure much faster if he didn't have them with him. Still, there were moments that made up for all of his suffering. Like that time when Lina and Amelia had to get in those silly sailor outfits. Or that time when Martina had put that curse on Lina ...

Amelia looks up from her plate to see Zelgadis grinning with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

Amelia: What's so funny?

Zelgadis: Oh, nothing. remembers Gourry in drag Heh.

Amelia sighs with longing. To see Zelgadis with a smile on his face was rare and it just made her love him even more.

Amelia: Oh Zel, if you only knew just how much I love you. If you only knew ] just how bright my justice loving heart burned for you ...

Zelgadis chuckles as he thinks about Noonsa kissing Lina. Then he notices Amelia looking at him with big teary eyes with her hands clasped to her bosom.

Zelgadis: Uh oh. She's looking at me weird again. I have to do something before she opens her mouth ...

Amelia: Oh Zelgadis! To see a smile upon your handsome face! The Gods have surely blessed me today!

Zelgadis: Too late.

Zelgadis jumps up from his seat to escape and turns to run. Then he crashes into someone and looks up to a pair of purple eyes looking down at him.

Zelgadis: XELLOS!!

Xellos: Hiya gang. Missed me?

Lina and Gourry momentarily stop stuffing themselves to look at the Trickster Priest.

Lina: What the heck are you doing here?

Xellos: Oh, come Lina. Is that a way to greet an old friend?

Lina: You're not my friend, you nutcase! Now get out of here before I fireball your ass!

Xellos: Sigh I guess this means you don't want to know where the Clair Bible is ...

Lina and Zelgadis whip their heads around to stare at Xellos. They have a incredulous look on their faces that immediately dissolve into sneers.

Zelgadis: We're not falling for that one again. The last time you told us where the Clair Bible was, it brought us nothing but trouble.

Lina: Just what do you think you can accomplish by lying to us?

Xellos: But I'm not lying! I was told by a very reliable source where the book is.

Amelia: And just who is this source?

Xellos: That's a secret.

Lina: That's it!!!

Lina grabs Xellos into a headlock while Gourry charges up his Sword of Light, which he shoves underneath Xellos' nose.

Gourry: I suggest it no longer remain a secret.

Xellos sweatdrops as Amelia charges up a fireball and Zelgadis unsheathes his sword.

Zelgadis: I'm gonna enjoy this.

Xellos: Eye widens Okay! Okay! I'll talk! I'll talk!

Lina releases him from her headlock. Xellos rubs his neck while taking big gulps of air.

Xellos: I was told by a shriveled-up old woman.

Lina: An old woman?

Xellos: Yes.

Gourry: So who is she?

Xellos: I don't know.

They look at him silently.

Xellos: I mean it! She just popped out of nowhere and told me the Clair Bible's location!

Lina snorts. Zelgadis frowns as Amelia and Gourry look at each other with skepticism.

Xellos: Oh come on! Look, it's not that far away from here. I'll take you right to it.

The foursome huddles to discuss.

Lina: Do you think he's lying to us again?

Zelgadis: I wouldn't be surprised if he was, that namagomi!

Amelia: I don't know ... he sounds really sincere ...

Gourry: But didn't he sound sincere last time? And look what happened! We nearly got killed!

Lina: Okay, this is what we'll do. We follow Xellos and the moment it starts to feel fishy, we get the hell out of there.

Zelgadis: I don't like it, but we can't risk it in case he's telling the truth.

Lina: Alright, let's go.

They brake up their huddle and face Xellos.

Lina: Okay, Xellos, we'll go along with this. But the moment something feels wrong, we're bailing outta there. Right after we kick your ass, of course.

Xellos: Of course. Well now that's been settled, can we begin our journey?

He turns around and walks through the door. The foursome reluctantly follow him.


Chapter 2   |   Fanfiction