Zelgadis sighed.
He looked around the clothing store and frowned darkly. Nuriko had insisted on buying new clothes before meeting the Emperor. He was still dizzy from all those nosebleeds induced by lingerie shopping.
Zelgadis: Just what the hell was Nuriko thinking? Dragging me into such a feminine place...It took all of my demon strength not to faint from libido overdose. It didn't help that Nuriko had looked pretty good with that purple -
Zelgadis smacked himself.
Zelgadis: What the hell are you thinking about?!?! You can't think about Nuriko that way? So she's cute and nice and got great legs and...drool...
Smack!!!
Zelgadis: Must control hormones. Must control hormones. Curses!! This is what happens when you don't get any! You start fantasizing about any cute girl who's nice to you! Damn you, Rezo! Why did you change me into this hideous creature!!
Nuriko: Oh, Zelly-chaaaann...what do you think of this outfit?
Zelgadis stared.
Zelgadis: Wow...you...um...look...um...really...um...great...
Nuriko giggled. She spun around to show off the back side. Zelgadis felt another nosebleed coming on when he saw how the cloth clung to her curves and the gigantic slit down the side that showed her legs.
Zelgadis: I can't handle much more of this. We gotta get out of here and get to the capital. Fast.
Zelgadis smiled...or he tried to anyway.
Zelgadis: You look great Nuriko. Are you done shopping now? I would like to get to the capital soon and search for my friends.
Nuriko: Oh silly me! Of course I'm done. I'm sorry it took so long.
She took all of her choices to the shopkeeper and paid the money. With the mountain (and I'm not joking here) of packages, they set off down the road.
They spent the hours of travel telling each other about their own worlds. Zelgadis was absolutely fascinated with the whole Miko deal and Nuriko was astounded at how common magic was in Zelgadis' world. By nightfall, Nuriko was quite tired...or so she said...
Nuriko: Zelgadis, could we stop at an inn for the night? I'm pooped.
Zelgadis: All right. Where is the closest inn?
Nuriko: I know just the place.
When they reached the inn, Nuriko made a beeline for the bar.
Zelgadis: Nuriko, I thought you were tired? Wouldn't you rather sleep?
Nuriko: Let's have a drink first. To celebrate, eh?
Zelgadis: Well...okay.
He sat on the bar stool and reluctantly lowered his mask. The bartender looked at Zelgadis with surprise. After much gawking, he left to get Nuriko's drink.
Nuriko: Just ignore him. There's nothing wrong with your face.
Zelgadis: What do you mean there's nothing wrong with my face? It's hideous! I don't blame him for being disgusted...
Nuriko softly touched his shoulder.
Nuriko: I'm not disgusted.
They looked at each other for a moment. Then Zelgadis smiled.
Zelgadis: Thanks, Nuriko.
Nuriko: You're welcome.
The bartender set the drinks in front of them.
Nuriko: Now drink up! This is my special drink. It's called the "Nuriko Special". It's a bit strong so don't over do it.
Zelgadis took a sip. He turned red and started coughing. Nuriko patted him on the back and Zelgadis' face slammed into the table.
Nuriko: Sweatdrops. Oops...I keep forgetting about my strength...are you okay, Zel-chan?
Zelgadis: Cough. Yeah, I'm okay.
Nuriko: Good! Now, when we get to the capital, Hotohori will tell us if their we're any visitors from your world. But if he haven't heard about your friends, we have to contact Chichiri. I'm sure that he'll be able to find your friends.
Zelgadis: I hope so. I feel so helpless in this world. I don't even know where to start looking for them. As for that damn &$^*%$@# Xellos...I'm going to be fry his @$$!!!
Nuriko: That's the spirit! Violence solves everything!
Zelgadis: I guess... I'm starting to sound like Lina...this is bad...
Nuriko took a sip of her drink and glanced at Zelgadis. His face was scrunched up while he thought about who knows what. Then Nuriko's gaze wandered...lower...
Nuriko: Hmm...I wonder if his rock down there too...is there some way I can pull down his pants and make it look like an accident? Hmm...
Zelgadis: Hmm...I wonder if Nuriko is really tired. She says she is but she looks pretty peppy...
A heavy silence settled over them. Finally, Nuriko finished off her last drop and yawned.
Nuriko: Boy I'm pooped! Time for bed!
She got off the stool and stumbled. Luckily, Zelgadis' demon reflexes kicked in and he caught her just in time.
Nuriko: Aya...I guess I'm more drunk than I thought. Can you help me up the stairs, Zelly chan?
Zelgadis blushed furiously and stuttered a yes. Nuriko leaned against his side and slowly made the journey up the stairs. Then suddenly, Nuriko stumbled again, and grabbed the nearest thing in her vicinity to stop the fall...Zelgadis' pants.
Zelgadis: Blink. Blink.
Nuriko: Stare. Stare.
With hands so fast you could barely make them out, he pulled up his pants, lifted Nuriko, slammed open the door, deposited Nuriko on the bed, and got the hell out of there.
Nuriko blinked and slowly grinned.
Nuriko: Heh...he's rock there too...that means...he's always...hard...
She started giggling hysterically. While Nuriko was having a laughing fit, Zelgadis was in his room, blushing so much his mask started to scorch from the heat.
Zelgadis: SHE. SAW. ME. OH. GODS. I. AM. SO. GOING. TO. KILL. MYSELF. DAMN. YOU. REZO!!!!!!!!!!!
The next morning, Zelgadis had trouble meeting Nuriko's eyes. She just chattered away, oblivious of his discomfort. Finally, Zelgadis decided to approach the subject of his...exposure.
Zelgadis: Umm...Nuriko...about last night...
Nuriko: Oh don't worry, Zelly chan. I didn't see anything. There's nothing for you to be embarrassed about.
Zelgadis: It's that not...it's just...I'm very sensitive about my body...so if you could, please don't tell anyone...
Nuriko: Tell people what? That you're hung like a draft horse?
Zelgadis narrowed his eyes.
Zelgadis: I thought you said you didn't see anything.
Nuriko: Oops. Goofed again. ^_^.
Amelia looked around her surroundings and gawked with awe.
Amelia: Where are we, Chichiri?
Chichiri: We are in the Temple of Suzaku, no da. This is the palace and if anyone from a foreign world came to Konan, it'll be relayed to Hotohori sama sooner or later. Let's go and meet him right now, na no da.
Amelia: Hotohori? Who's that?
Chichiri: The Emperor, no da.
Amelia: Oh! And here I am looking so bedraggled and dirty! I can't meet an Emperor looking like this!
Chichiri rolled his eyes. It seemed that women everywhere, even from another world, were all the same. He sighed and waved his staff. With a poof, Amelia was dressed in Konan finery.
Amelia: Oh thank you Chichiri! You are certainly a noble soul and a great ally against evil!
Chichiri: You're welcome, no da. Now can we get going? I want to be rid of her as soon as possible...damn I got a craving...where did I stash my supply of pills...
Amelia chattered non-stop right to the door of the audience room. Chichiri's smiling mask was working at maximum power to keep that smile on its face. It was threatening to become a gigantic grimace. A guard led them into the room.
Hotohori: Ah...Chichiri. It's been awhile since I've seen you. How is Taiitsu-kun?
Chichiri: She's fine, no da. Except the Nyan Nyans have been acting up lately. Hotohori sama, I'd like you to meet Princess Amelia, a stranger from another world, na no da.
Amelia stood silently as Hotohori examined her from head to toe, causing her to flush red.
Amelia: Wow! He's so handsome! He could be a supermodel or something!
Hotohori: Welcome, Princess Amelia, to Konan. What brings you to our august presence?
Amelia: Well, it's like this, Emperor. There is this REALLY evil Mazoku Priest called Xellos and he told us he found the Clair Bible but it actually was a really weird book that sucked us into this strange world and now I've lost my friends and I can't find them and I really need your help or who knows what dangers they're in, fighting against evil justice haters who-
Hotohori: THAT'S QUITE ENOUGH, AMELIA.
Amelia: Oops...sorry...I have a problem with making long speeches.
Hotohori and Chichiri shared a look that said "We noticed".
Hotohori sighed and adjusted his bucket hat.
Hotohori: Unfortunately, I have had no reports of your friends. Although there seems to be a forest fire near Mt. Leikaku...
Chichiri: Do you think it might be Tasuki? He might have accidentally set fire to the forest, no da.
Hotohori: No, he's not that careless. It's something else...
Amelia: Fire? Did you say fire? Well...wherever Miss Lina goes, she tends to Fireball people. It might be her! Could we go there!
Chichiri: I have a better idea, no da. I think I can project an image of the source of trouble. Then we can see if your Miss Lina is there.
Hotohori: Make it so, number one.
Chichiri: Sweatdrop. Hotohori sama...have you been watching Star Trek again?
Hotohori: Blush. Yes...
Chichiri sighed and started to chant under his breath. Amelia clutched her hands to her quickly beating heart and prayed for a miracle.
Amelia: Please be there Miss Lina...I long to see your happy face again...to hear your laugh as you set bandits on the road to goodness...no wait a minute, that's not right...
Slowly, an image started to form on the floor...
Amelia: It's Miss Lina! It's Miss Lina! It's...what is she doing?
Hotohori: It seems she is having a shouting match with Tasuki. Hmm...at least this explains the forest fire...
Chichiri: Tasuki and women don't mix, no da.
Amelia: Chichiri! We have to go there! We must join with Miss Lina and continue our search for my other friends! Oh Gourry! Oh my sweet Zelgadis sama!!
Hotohori: Yes, yes, Chichiri. You must help this poor girl! Leave for Mt.Leikaku immediately!
Chichiri: Whispering. But Hotohori sama...you can't be serious, no da? She drives me up the wall.
Hotohori: Whispering. I am very serious, Chichiri. If she continues to irritate me like this, I might do something crazy. Like screw up Konan. Capiche?
Chichiri: I understand...da...
The monk reluctantly took off his kesa and threw on to the floor.
Chichiri: Let's go, Amelia! Jump in, no da!
Amelia: All right! Here we go!!